The Healer's Guard
by Rotten Adel
Summary: After an assassination takes the life of his mentor, Jude's employer hires him a bodyguard to assure he's not the next target. But there's more to Alvin than meets the eye, and Exodus isn't about to give up the chase. (AU-Canon Divergent, Alvin/Jude)
1. Chapter 1

The following work deals heavily with PTSD and racially-motivated terrorism as described in both Xillia and Xillia 2. I have done my best to handle these topics respectfully while still remaining canon-compliant. Events written in this story are not related to any real world happenings, and any similarities are coincidental. If you are sensitive to these subjects, this may not be the best fic to read. That being said, if you have any suggestions on how I can handle these differently, please feel free to contact me.

* * *

He'd never seen this many people in one place in his entire life.

Jude Mathis peeked between the red velvet curtains and surveyed the crowd; hundreds of people wearing fine suits and elaborate dresses were chatting among themselves in the darkened room. The fact that a vast majority of them were established doctors and scientists only added to the knot of nerves forming in his stomach.

 _I don't think this many people even came to my graduation..._ Jude thought, taking a step from the curtains and retreating further backstage. He took a slow, soothing breath to calm the butterflies threatening to force his dinner from his stomach and onto his freshly polished shoes. It wasn't as if he was the one that had to go out on stage and give a speech; he only had to stand behind his mentor and try not to look too dazzled by his presence.

Right out of medical school, Jude had been recruited by the famous Professor Haus, a prolific researcher of Spirit Artes and their applied healing properties. A great man, and an even greater scientist, he was someone that Jude had idolized since beginning his education in the big city of Fennmont. It came as no surprise that Professor Haus had been chosen to receive the Howe Prize for his achievements in the field, but Jude still couldn't figure out why he was being taken along to the ceremony. Research assistants normally didn't get that sort of luxury.

Then again, Professor Haus often spoke of his potential, to him and his colleagues. Not only had he completed an accelerated doctorate course at sixteen, but he had been one of only a handful of students chosen to attend university in Trigleph so he could continue his education while working. This would have meant little if it were not for his race.

Up until a year ago, his homeland of Rieze Maxia had been completely cut off from the neighboring country of Elympios, citing stark differences in religion and scientific views. The no-contact treaty allowed the two countries to develop separately, many completely unaware of the other's existence just a few hundred miles away.

That was until recently, when an energy shortage and declining environmental health forced the governing bodies of Elympios to seek aid from their neighbors. Their way of life was declining rapidly, and if they didn't come to a resolution soon their entire country would die out. The ruler of Rieze Maxia was sympathetic to their plight and agreed to the open sharing of technology and skill, hoping to build goodwill between the two worlds for the mutual benefit for both.

Unfortunately, many Elympions didn't see it that way.

Racial tension had been a hot topic of conversation since the opening of the border. Jude had faced it many times, being one of the few Rieze Maxian students on an almost entirely Elympion campus. It was unnerving, to say the least, to have his views and abilities scrutinized simply for his place of birth. He had even been accused of cheating his way into the university, his acceptance dependent on his heritage alone. Jude ignored it as well as he could, but the comments still stung.

But all that didn't matter in the end. He couldn't change the way others looked at him, he could only continue his work.

"Hey, Jude!"

Startled out of his reverie, Jude whirled around to see who had decided to sneak up on him, "L-Leia…! What are you doing here?" Bright-eyed and dressed in the latest Elympion trends was his best friend, Leia Rolando. They had grown up together in the mining town of Leronde, playing with each other every day before he left for school in Fennmont. When he had started medical school, Leia had worked as a nurse's assistant to his mother in hopes of joining her friend one day. But after Jude took the job as a research assistant and moved to Trigleph, Leia lost interest in the field, and began pursuing her "true calling" as a journalist.

"I'm covering the Howe Prize Ceremony, of course! This is the first time it's been held in Trigleph, so of course it's going to be big news."

"Your boss sent you to cover it?" Jude asked, honestly surprised. Leia was dedicated to her craft, but her writing left a lot to be desired. Her articles read more like opinion columns than actual news, something that her boss often scolded her on. But she did have a knack for sniffing out big news, and using her connections like a real pro. That explained her presence at the private event such as this; Jude was just one of many of said connections.

Leia's grin faltered only briefly before scribbling more notes on the paper, "Not exactly, but I couldn't pass this up! And since _you're_ here, you can give me a firsthand account of the presentation! It'll be a big hit!"

He admired her for her enthusiasm, but Jude wasn't quite in the state needed to offer a proper interview. "Wouldn't it be better to interview Professor Haus? He's the one receiving the award…"

The grin returned with renewed vigor and instantly Jude regretted saying anything. "That's a great idea, Jude! You can get me a sit-down interview with Professor Haus after this is all done!"

"What? I didn't say that!"

"Oh, c'mon, Jude!" She crossed her arms, puffing her cheeks. "This could be my big break! Won't you help me out?" The puppy eyes, she was giving him the puppy eyes and Jude could only groan inwardly at her antics. Leave it to Leia to twist his arm into helping her out. It wasn't like he particularly minded most of the time, it just became a hassle when he had to jump through hoops for her sake. But then again, Leia would do the same for him if it came down to something she could get, so in the end, Jude conceded.

"Fine, I'll ask him, but I make no promises. Professor Haus is a busy man and this is a big night for him."

"Ask me what, Jude?"

Finally, the man of the hour emerged from the dressing room, a kind smile upon his aged features. Immediately Jude straightened up, addressing the man with a proper nod, "Sorry, sir. My friend here is a reporter, and she wanted to do an interview with you after the award ceremony."

"An interview, you say?" Professor Haus seemed to consider this for a second, glancing between Leia's hopeful expression and Jude's apologetic one. After a moment of deliberation, he nodded, "I think I can spare a bit of time if it's for a friend of Jude's. Come find me after the ceremony and we'll talk."

Leia was absolutely beaming, her notebook clutched so hard in her fist that Jude was sure the poor, abused paper would never recover. "Thank you, Professor Haus! I'll write an article so mind-blowingly good that it'll make front page!"

"See that you do. Now, I must be going." He waved to her before heading to the opposite end of the stage to speak to the announcer.

Jude breathed a sigh of relief, glad his mentor was a generous man, then returned his gaze to Leia. "You're going to give me a heart attack one day. Don't put me on the spot like that when I'm at work." A warning, and one he intended to make good on by ignoring text messages and phone calls if Leia tried anything again. That was about all he could do; after so long, Leia knew just about everything about him, from his favorite foods to his deepest fears. That, and writing a juicy exposé about him and publishing it in the only major paper in Trigleph wasn't completely beyond her.

Leia could be scary at times, but at least she was always at his side when he needed someone.

The lights dimmed beyond the curtain and the chattering crowd began applauding. The ceremony was about to begin. "I have to go," he said to Leia, waving to her as he went to stand at Professor Haus's side, "Come find me after this and we'll get that interview done."

"Thanks, Jude!" She called back, flitting off to find her own seat. Once she was gone, Jude was all nerves again. Maybe it was his upbringing in Leronde, or maybe it was years of insufficient social stimuli as he shut himself away with books and papers, but the mere prospect of standing up in front of a crowd and giving a presentation always rattled him so badly he thought he would vomit. He was grateful when Professor Haus approached him again, hoping the man's glowing presence would calm him at least a little.

"Jude, I've a favor to ask of you." The professor began, placing a firm hand on his assistant's shoulder. Another favor, but coming from Professor Haus it was more of a privilege than a chore (unlike Leila's demands).

"Sure, professor, what is it?" Jude asked, curious. The man placed a great deal of trust in his young assistant, even charging him with taking care of his clinic's patients when he had to attend a meeting. A great responsibility, but a task he was more than willing to do to prove himself to his idol. That is, until the health board put a stop to it. Jude was still a student, after all, and though he had earned his doctorate in Rieze Maxia, the standards for education didn't carry over to Elympios.

"After tonight, I'll be taking a bit of a vacation from the spotlight. I've something I need to take care of elsewhere, and I would like you to hold down the lab while I'm away."

"A vacation? Now?" They had only recently begun a new project, and had even been given laboratory space at the Elympion military base, Helioborg. They were only a few weeks into their work and now the professor was intending to drop it all in the lap of his assistant?

Professor Haus nodded, his face sullen, almost grim. "It's something I need to do. I trust you to continue our work in my absence, Jude. You have what it takes to complete this task." And just like that, the somber frown was gone, replaced with the professor's usual, fatherly smile, "Besides, you'll still have Balan and Mary to help you. You'll do just fine with one less head in the mix."

Jude couldn't help the feeling that he was being duped into covering for his boss so he could gallivant off to some sunny destination, but being allowed to lead the project in his absence was an honor all the same. He offered an awkward bow, a show of thanks that was typical of his fellow Rieze Maxian when before their superiors. "I'd be honored, sir."

"Wonderful. We shall discuss our next steps in the morning."

The announcer on the other side of the curtains finished his pre-prepared speech, the crowd erupting into applause once again. Professor Haus said nothing as he walked onto the stage with the confidence expected of a well-established scientist, Jude following stiffly after. He accepted the gold, egg-shaped award graciously, shaking the announcers hand before setting the mounted piece upon the podium. Jude stood to his left, hands awkwardly at his sides as he tried not to sweat _too_ much in the presence of all the glory packed into one room.

Professor Haus began his speech, thanking the attendees for their warm response. All the while, Jude surveyed the room, attempting to pick out anyone he recognized from school or otherwise. He saw Leia towards the back, pressed against the stage exit door and hastily scribbling notes as Professor Haus spoke. There was another student from his class, one he recognized as the son of a prolific businessman in Drillan, and his father sandwiched between him and what he could assume was his wife. A small group of school children, youth ambassadors, he assumed, sat towards the front center to offer a better view of the precedings. And at the rear exits, a group of guards wearing full regalia, sent to oversee the event and maintain order.

But what caught his eye was not the guards at the exits, but the ones stationed above the audience, standing upon the scaffolding over the light fixtures. Strange that they would station anyone up there, Jude thought. Did they expect some kind of trouble? He couldn't imagine anyone would cause a scene at an elite gathering such as this…

He was wrong. So very, very wrong.

It was only minor at first; a sudden glint out of his peripheral, the lights from the stage lamps reflecting off a metallic surface. Jude barely had time to register what it was before he shouted his mentor's name, a warning that came too late.

A shot rang out, then another, and another. Jude could only watch in horror as his mentor fell to the ground with a sickening thud, limbs twitching, the split in his skull leaking grotesquely onto the polished wood. The audience burst into shrill screams and panicked cries as everyone began running, trying to flee the scene before they too met the same fate as the professor.

Except for Jude.

Jude did the only thing he could; he flew into action, his years of training telling him to act fast, heal what he could. He could save a life, he could save the professor, the man who took him under his wing and treated him like a son above all else. His hands were pressed against the gaping wound on the back of the man's skull and he concentrated all of his mana on trying to seal the wound, repair the damage to the man's brain. Yet no matter how much energy he dumped into the healing circle, the man didn't move, just stared lifelessly up at him.

"Come on, Professor! Wake up!" He screamed, voice cracking in his panic. Part of him said he could still save him if he tried just a little harder, if he had just a little more power, but logically he knew that the man was already dead, too far gone for even his spirit artes to recover him.

That didn't mean Jude couldn't try, concentrating until his head ached and his arms shook with the sheer effort of dumping his energy into a wound that was untreatable. More shots, a small explosion, and the hall began to fill with a thick, acrid smoke, adding to the terror of the crowd that was trying to push through the exit doors all at once. Were they shooting at the crowd? Was the building on fire? He couldn't think straight, the smoke burning his eyes and lungs, his body heavy with the absence of energy.

 _What do I do? The professor… The professor is…!_

"Jude!" Suddenly he was being tugged upwards, and through the fog of his mind he realized Leia was there and looked just as panicked as he felt. "Jude, we have to get out of here!"

"But the professor…!" He tugged away, taking his position next to Professor Haus once more, dumping mana he couldn't afford to spare into his already lifeless body. "Help me, Leia! We can still save him!"

"He's already gone, Jude!" Leia shouted, half-leading, half-dragging Jude away from the corpse of his mentor and towards the emergency exit, "We need to get out of here! They're shooting at people!"

Jude knew she was right. Maxwell above, she was right, and he had never felt like more of a failure than in that moment.

And he was left to wonder why anyone would want to end the life of someone who was only doing good in the world.

* * *

Hello and thank you for reading! I've been publishing this fic on AO3 for the past few weeks, but decided to post it here as well for those who may not have access to AO3 proper. I've been working really hard on this fic and I hope you all enjoy it! I would like to thank LividLillies for being such a wonderful editor and keeping things flowing smoothly. Without her, there wouldn't be weekly updates! Please feel free to leave feedback or comments on my work, and thank you again!


	2. Chapter 2

Most people take a sabbatical after being involved in a terrorist attack. It was offered to him, of course, but Jude had steadfastly refused the time off. Whether it'd be called commitment or just plain stubborn determination, Jude was back at Helioborg the next day, insisting he be allowed to pick up Professor Haus's research and continue where he left off. It was his way of coping with the loss of his mentor, an opportunity to make good on the promise of keeping their work going in the man's absence.

His superiors were certain this wasn't a good idea, especially when news broke of who was responsible for the attack: an anti-Rieze Maxian extremist group called Exodus. From the way the news painted it, they were a puritan group set on keeping the merger of the worlds from happening, and strongly opposed the aid offered by their benevolent neighbors.

Yet if you changed the channel, they were just considered a strongly opinionated party that thought it better for the people of Elympios to resolve their own issues without involving another country. Jude found it strange how one reportedly bi-partisan station could have such a conflicting view from another. He supposed that was just an Elympion thing; Rieze Maxia didn't have much in the way of public broadcasts outside from notices circulated by courier around the trade routes.

But having a name to the face didn't diminish the danger that Jude was apparently in. After the incident, he had been taken in for questioning. Did Haus have any enemies? Would anyone want him dead? Was he using funding improperly? Was he receiving bribes? All questions he didn't know the answer to, because they all seemed so far off-base from what he had come to expect of his mentor. Yes, Professor Haus could be a little eccentric, but what scientist wasn't? Even their superior in the lab, Balan, tended to be a little on the odd side, even going so far as to use his own body for new spyrix prototypes.

Thankfully, the both of them had been cleared of all wrongdoing and sent on their way, and Jude had been buried in work ever since.

The police's orders were clear: stay away from windows, unlocked doors, open areas. Have someone with you at all times, just in case something were to happen. It was clear to them that Jude was a likely secondary target if the assassination was anything beyond racially motivated. So having Jude show up to the lab Monday morning was more than a little alarming.

"I admire your dedication," Balan stood before him, pushing up his glasses with a perturbed expression usually reserved for unpaid interns and overzealous coffee-runners, "But is it really wise to be here right now? They still haven't caught the shooters."

Being confronted with the same declaration for the third time that day was really beginning to get to Jude. To hear it from Balan, the man who would live in the lab if his boss would allow it, was especially irritating. He knew it was just because they were worried, not only for him but for themselves. If there was another attack at Helioborg like the one at the event hall, the civilian casualties would be doubled from the patients in treatment alone. No one wanted that, especially not Jude.

But work was the only thing keeping him sane, and Balan knew this, yet continued to badger him about taking a break.

"Look, I know you want to finish Haus's research into spyrix stabilization, but consider your health and safety for once."

 _Big words coming from the man with the unstable prototype strapped to his leg…_ Jude grimaced, wrapping an arm around his middle, lowering his gaze. "I get that, but after what happened… I feel like the only thing I _can_ do is keep working. Professor Haus put everything he had into this research. I don't want to waste it."

Balan shook his head, planting a hand on his hip, "Be that as it may, you're risking everyone by being here. Until this dies down, you need to lay low, maybe get out of town for a while. Perhaps go see your parents?"

His parents… They were the last people he wanted to see. Jude had no doubt they had caught wind of the incident by now, especially with how much Leia and his mother talked on their GHS's. His mother would be worried sick, while his dad insisted that this was too big for him and to just give up and move on. His relationship with his dad had been strained at best recently; his harsh and critical nature was one of the big reasons he wanted to pursue his education elsewhere and not near his family.

Yet in spite of this, going back to Leronde would be a good idea. Hell, getting out of Elympios was a good idea, but he couldn't bring himself to do it.

There was so much that needed to be done, so many leads left unchecked. If he left now, he'd probably go stir-crazy just thinking about all that he had left behind.

"Listen, Jude, I'd hate to have to do this, but if you don't take a break, I'll have to revoke your clearance…" A serious threat, especially from Balan who admired progress above all else.

Jude was about to go on the defensive, when the door to the lab slid open with a mechanical whir, "That won't be necessary, Balan."

Pressed suit, tanned skin, white hair with a stunning smile. Jude had only met the man once, but his presence alone resonated with power and money. A real man of status, and one not to be trifled with, the CEO of Spirius, "President Bakur…"

The prestigious man aimed a smile Jude's way, hands tucked behind his back as he spoke, "Your resolve is commendable, Dr. Mathis, even if it is a bit unwise."

"That…" _Wasn't really a compliment…_ Jude thinks, but lowered his gaze respectfully at the man standing before him. Without President Bakur's interest in his and Professor Haus's skills, they never would have had the opportunity to work in a technologically advanced lab like Helioborg. Not only that, but it was his influence that allowed him to be admitted into the university in Trigleph as well. He owed a lot to this man and his faith in their research.

"I understand the strain that the tragic incident at the award ceremony must have caused you. Therefore, I have arranged for you to telecommute your research for the time-being." Telecommuting, another concept foreign to him. Elympions possessed the technology to have information and materials transferred via wires and prompters, something Jude had never experienced before the border was opened. He knew Balan had several pieces of equipment at his apartment for this purpose, so he could continue to participate in work on days where his leg was especially bothering him.

Jude knew well what this meant, "So you're also saying that I shouldn't return to the lab…"

Bakur nodded, "You must understand our position, Dr. Mathis. While we appreciate the work you are doing for the good of Elympion citizens, until the issue of the assassination is resolved, we need to prioritize the safety of others on base."

 _So I'm a liability… Great…_ The worry must have been apparent on his face, because Bakur did not stop there. "Ah, but it isn't as if we are completely abandoning you in your time of need. Come, there is someone I would like you to meet."

His words were far from comforting. Jude wasn't looking to be coddled or treated like an unfortunate victim damaged during a horrific event. He just wanted to continue working quietly, even if his ideals were enough to put a target on his back. But he couldn't very well deny his boss's requests of staying clear of the facility, nor could he turn down virtually anything offered to him. Doing so would be career suicide and Jude knew it.

Jude silently followed Bakur as he lead him from the lab and out to the main entrance, all the while wondering just who he was supposed to meet and for what reason.

At the front gate there stood a man, tall with a muscular build, chestnut hair slicked away from coppery eyes. He wore a finely tailored suit of navy blue and bold violet, a yellow scarf around his neck in place of a tie. He looked his way only when Bakur approached, offering a cocky grin to the two of them. "There you are." He exclaimed with a playful grin to the president, "Took you long enough. Did he fight or something?"

"Hardly, I was merely explaining the situation." Bakur turned to Jude, motioning to the strange man, "Dr. Mathis, this is Alvin Svent. Your new bodyguard."

"Bodyguard?" He wouldn't have guessed that was the reason he was being brought here. His research was important to Spirius that much he knew, but Jude had no idea that Bakur held so much stock in it that he'd go out of his way to hire a personal guard for him. He's flattered, but still very, very confused.

The guard, Alvin, wasted no time in getting friendly with his new charge. A hand was offered to Jude to shake, a broad smile on the man's face. "Just call me Alvin. Pleasure to meet you, kid."

Jude grimaced at the nickname, but took the hand with only minor hesitance. "Jude is fine, and… I wasn't expecting this, sorry." He returns the shake firmly if only to prove that his height was not an indication of how skilled or intelligent he was. Jude had always been a little on the scrawny side.

Bakur clears his throat, catching the men's attention, "Until further notice, Alvin is to remain at your side at all times to assure your continued safety. Given that these extremists have already taken the life of one of our most valued researchers, we are sparing no expense for your protection."

It was strange to hear his importance validated by this man, and even stranger to hear that his work was important enough to garner around the clock protection. Jude did stop to wonder why Balan wasn't being extended the same courtesy, but the answer to that seemed clear; he was Rieze Maxian, and Balan wasn't. Exodus had no interest in executing their own, just the "monsters" that lived just over the border.

In the end, he could only thank him. "I appreciate your concern for me, President Bakur. I hope that this is cleared up quickly so I don't trouble you further."

"Worry not, Dr. Mathis. Everything will become clear in due time. For now, you are to stay indoors and continue working from the safety of your home." He glanced to Alvin, who offered up a wave, one Bakur did not bother to return, "Alvin will see you onto the train. I expect a report on your progress by week's end."

"Yes, sir."

"Do you really have to follow me _everywhere_?"

"Yep, that's my job," Alvin answered with a shrug, clearly taking amusement in Jude's embarrassment. "Wherever you go, I go, that's the rules."

Jude was very much against these rules.

They had been in each other's company for under an hour and Jude was already finding Alvin's constant presence irritating. It wasn't just that he was a complete stranger, he'd get used to that eventually. It was more that he had been hired to be within a certain radius wherever Jude went. Alvin had sat in the seat beside him on the train, kept close as they wove through the busy crowds at the Trigleph station, and even stood next to him when he ducked into the restroom to relieve himself. For someone who valued his privacy as much as Jude, having Alvin glued to his side was becoming very frustrating, very fast.

To make matters worse, Alvin was supposed to stay with him at his apartment. His very small, very messy apartment.

Jude unlocked the sliding door and carefully navigated the cluttered entryway into his apartment. He was hardly ever home, and when he was, he was either too tired from work to bother cleaning up, or too busy studying to care. Bringing Alvin into the chaos that was his quarters marked the first time a stranger had come into his home, which only served to add to Jude's already frayed nerves.

"Sorry, I don't have a guest bedroom. It's a pretty small place." Jude commented as he stepped over a collection of unread research papers piled in the living room, taking a moment to clear the mass amount of books from the couch. The least he could do was offer his guest a place to sit; the table was already overtaken with books stacked higher than he was tall. He'd tackle those another day.

Alvin looked around the living space with mild curiosity, noting the overstuffed shelves, the absence of anything that could be considered a luxury. Save for the old television set sandwiched between two of the shelves, Jude's apartment looked less like a home and more like a catchall for his research materials. "I thought researchers made a lot of gald?"

Jude merely shrugged, trying to organize the books into a cohesive order before setting them aside. He'd alphabetize them properly later. "Most of my funds go to procuring research materials outside of the lab's budget. I barely have enough to cover this place as it is."

"And here I thought I was assigned to watch over a prolific researcher and live in the lap of luxury while doing it."

There was a distinct twitch in Jude's left eye as he tossed yet another stack of books onto the growing assortment on the table. "I didn't become a researcher for the money."

"Why not?" Alvin asked, genuinely curious, "Most researchers I've met are either obsessed with glory or gald. I didn't peg you for the mad scientist type, so..."

"It's not about that. Did you become a bodyguard for the money?"

Alvin cocked a brow, "Yes, I did."

And there went Jude's argument. Of course, why would someone put their life on the line for something other than cash? It wasn't like everyone had some true and pure motivation to pursue their careers, especially not Elympions…

It was that train of thought that brought him to a halt. Generalizations like that were what extremist groups like Exodus used to justified their actions. He couldn't think the same as them.

With the couch sufficiently cleared, Jude turned to the desk to begin clearing it as well. The equipment for his job was to be delivered in the morning, and he was going to need room for all of it. "Anyway, I've got some studying to do. You can watch television or something…"

Alvin flopped onto the couch and began fiddling with the remote, "All right. Let me know when you need to go out so I can go with you."

"Is that really necessary?"

Jude was cut off by a wave of Alvin's hand before he could protest further. "Bakur's orders were protect you from any potential attackers," he repeated for what felt like the sixth time since leaving Helioborg. "So, yes, I'm going with you wherever you go. Whether it'd be the store, the lab, on a walk," his voice dipped lower, "or on a date…"

"D-date?"

Alvin gave him a playful wink, which only served to make the heat rise in Jude's cheeks, "Even on a date. Where you go, I go. That's my job."

Something told him he wasn't going to like this. Not one bit. But before he could voice this, Alvin interrupted, as if he too sensed the discomfort in the boy's mind. "Look, the guy who did that to Professor Haus is still out there. Until we find him, I'm sticking to you like a shadow."

"But… How do we know they actually want me dead?" That was another thing Jude couldn't wrap his head around. If he was a target as well, would they have not taken the opportunity presented at the event hall? He was right there, completely unguarded and too exhausted from trying to save his mentor to heal himself had he been hit. Would it not be an opportune time for an assassin to strike?

Again, Alvin seemed to have the answer, "That's just it, we don't know. They wanted Haus dead, and Haus and you were partners in your field, so it serves to reason they would want you out of the picture, too."

He was right. Damn Alvin and his logic.

"Fine, but please leave me be while we're here. I'll have to work double-time if I'm going to pick up where Professor Haus left off." And with that he flopped upon his desk chair and went to work, efficiently shutting out Alvin and his stupid logic. He didn't have time for this; there was so much work to be done and not being in the lab made it harder to complete.

The conversation came to the end, Alvin flicking on the aged television set that he was sure came with the already run-down apartment. For a time the only noise to fill the room was the quiet ramblings of the news broadcast and Jude's hasty scribbling. As usual, the lackluster happenings of the world hardly held his attention, and soon his focus drifted to the boy sitting at the desk across the room.

"You sure do work hard, don't you?" He asked, attempting conversation if only to ease the tension between them.

The interruption had the opposite effect, Jude's shoulder's stiffening as soon as he spoke, "I'm the only one who can continue this line of research. No one in Elympios has the ability to."

"Huh… Is it because you're some kind of super genius, or something?"

"Uh… Well…"

"How old are you anyway?" Jude wasn't small, nor was he particularly muscular. His slight build was accented by lithe muscles and calloused hands, his youthful amber eyes darting across the paper with each line written. Young was a fair way to describe him, far younger than someone claiming the title of doctor should be.

Jude gave up on writing notes for the time being and turned his chair to face Alvin properly. It was only polite if they were to have a conversation, after all. "I'm sixteen, and I'm still in school. But by Rieze Maxian standards, I've already earned my PhD."

"Sixteen _and_ a doctor?" Alvin was impressed and it showed.

"Yes, Dr. Jude Mathis… But like I said, the criteria for being a doctor by Elympion standards are higher, probably because of the differences in technology."

"Oh yeah, that's right… Is it true that doctors in Rieze Maxia can heal people using just the power of spirits?" He wasn't trying to be rude, Alvin was just genuinely curious. He had met so few Rieze Maxians that had a proper grasp of the spirits around them, and even fewer who were willing to answer a simple Elympion's questions about them. Jude seemed willing enough, at least.

"Not all of them, but yes, with the proper training someone who is well-versed in Spirit Artes can heal anything from cavities to sprains to broken bones."

"But not gunshot wounds."

The proclamation shook Jude, his gaze lowering to the floor. It was a harmless comment, he knew, but the timing… It hurt, it really did. "I… I tried to save him, you know." He sighed, tucking a bit of stray hair behind his ear. It was getting too long again. "But the wound to his head… I wasn't able to…"

"You were lucky to get out alive." Alvin interjected before Jude could deprecate himself further, "Be grateful for that."

"But Dr. Haus…"

Alvin shook his head, "You're continuing his work, aren't you? That has to count for something."

As harsh as the words were, Jude couldn't help the somber smile on his face.


	3. Chapter 3

"Uh, Jude? Don't look now, but there's a shady looking guy who's been tailing you since we left physics…"

Jude sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Dennis wasn't wrong; Alvin _did_ look shady, and he _was_ tailing him, but he was also being paid to do so. No matter how much he protested, Alvin had insisted on coming to school with him, even if it was horridly embarrassing to have a grown man following him around all day.

"Yeah, that's just Alvin. My boss hired him to be my bodyguard." Even just saying it was taking some getting used to. It had only been a few days since Alvin had come to stay with him, and so far it had been just as awkward as the first. Jude had lived alone for years, staying in dorms and student housing since he left home at the tender age of ten. Having someone suddenly in his private space at all hours only served to make him feel anxious in his own home. He knew Alvin was only there to keep him safe, but Jude was beginning to wonder if that was worth his mental discomfort.

"Oh, right…" Dennis, ever the observant one, finally realized just what happened to merit his classmate having a bodyguard. He shuffled awkwardly closer, extending a cautious hand to Jude's shoulder, "Hey, are you doing okay? It's only been a few days… I'd take a vacation"

"I'm fine," Jude insisted. "I'm just focusing on my research for now."

Four days in and he was already sick of people asking if he was okay. He wasn't, and that was to be expected, yet he was doing his best not to focus on it. Jude didn't want everyone to pity him for the loss of his mentor, or for witnessing such a heinous crime. He just wanted to move on, to continue his studies and not think about how he saw one of the most influential men in his life murdered in cold blood.

But everyone around him continued to bring it up.

Dennis was less than convinced, but let it drop either way. "Well, all right… But if you need someone to talk to, you have my number."

"Right… Thanks, Dennis."

The older student made a show of checking his watch before waving at his classmate. "I have to head to Anatomy. I'll see you later, Jude. Nice meeting you, Alvin!"

Alvin gave a sort of half wave with a smile, "Take it easy, Dennis."

Dennis disappeared down the hall and once again Jude sighed in defeat. He turned to face his bodyguard, brow furrowed, "Look, don't take this the wrong way, but can't you make yourself less conspicuous?"

Alvin shook his head, crossing his arms across his chest, "No can do, kid. The purpose of a bodyguard is to, you know, stand guard. It's supposed to make people think twice before messing with you."

Jude quirked a brow, "I'm at school. No one is going to _mess with me_." Well, at least not in the sense that Alvin was likely thinking. Being one of a handful of Rieze Maxian students on campus didn't award him the luxury of popularity. In fact, he had already been a forced participant in his fair share of fist-fights. It wasn't like he wanted to get into a brawl, but when it was three-on-one and the teachers had decided to look the other way, he wasn't going to go down without throwing a few punches.

Thankfully, much of his childhood had been spent sparring with Leia and learning martial arts from her mother. Although, knowing Sonia, she would have beaten his rear with a broom handle if she knew he instigated a fight. That was just her way.

"How can you be so sure?" Alvin slung an arm around his shoulder, a playful grin upon his face, "For all you know, an assassin could be masquerading as one of your classmates!"

Jude's eyes grew wide; he hadn't considered that a possibility. Was Exodus really the type to recruit teenagers into their ranks? If the only requirement was want for coin and a disdain for any race other than their own, then there were plenty of potential candidates. The thought alone was enough to send a shiver down his spine. "You don't think they'd actually do that, do you?"

Alvin gave his shoulders a squeeze. "Who knows?" He was teasing, Jude knew, but that didn't settle the sudden sinking feeling he felt in his stomach. "But don't worry, you won't die on my watch. I'm a professional."

"Oh?" _That's right, Bakur said he trusted this guy..._ "So you've been a bodyguard for a while?"

"Yeah, I've had a few steady clients."

"How did it go? Any references you could share?"

Alvin went quiet, taking a sudden interest in the school's choice of billboard décor.

Not exactly the reaction Jude was looking for, "No references?"

Alvin shook his head, throwing up his hands in defeat, "Hey, I'm not responsible for what happens _after_ my assignment is done."

The answer only served to make Jude even more nervous than before. He knew Alvin was a guard for hire, but he hadn't considered what would happen to him if Bakur suddenly stopped paying him, or decided Jude wasn't worth protecting. It was disconcerting to know that his life was only worth as much as his weight in gald to Alvin, and probably only worth his research abilities to Bakur. It was all about what _he_ could do for _them_ , and not much else.

Self-worth sufficiently in the toilet, Jude shook off whatever nervousness he felt and faced Alvin properly. "Anyway, I have chem lab next. It's dangerous for outsiders, so I'll need you to wait outside."

"After all that, you _still_ want me to stay away?" Alvin seemed honestly shocked. Jude could understand why; most people wouldn't dream of telling their bodyguards to wait outside if they knew they were being targeted. To anyone else, he must have looked like he was incredibly brave, or had a deathwish.

Jude shook his head, offering a nervous smile to his bodyguard, "It's fine. Honestly, I know everyone in that class. They're all nice enough. I'll be out by three."

In the end, it wasn't courage or a death wish; it was just Jude being far too trusting of the people he thought he knew. A rookie mistake, but he wasn't going to let Alvin convince him otherwise either.

Alvin shook his head with a heavy sigh. "Fair enough, but disclaimer, not responsible and all that."

From Alvin's pocket came a jaunty tune, one Jude recognized as the default ringer for the latest GHS model. The device was pulled from his pocket and Alvin frowned as soon as he looked at the display.

"I have to take this. Wait at your classroom when you're done and don't wander off." And with that, he was gone, leaving Jude alone in the rapidly clearing hallway.

 _He lectures me, then he up and leaves anyway._ For all the questions Alvin had asked of Jude since coming to stay with him, he still hadn't talked much about himself. So far all Jude had gathered was that he was your typical mercenary, that he was a born and raised Elympion, and that he had an inordinate amount of scarves that took up one full drawer of the already overstuffed dresser that Alvin insisted on cramming into the corner of Jude's bedroom. In fact, his fashion sense was about the most detailed thing Jude knew of Alvin. The rest was a mystery… And something told him Alvin wasn't the type to openly talk about himself, either.

Nothing for it, Jude decided, and headed to his next class.

The chemistry teacher wasn't particularly fond of Jude. It wasn't because he was a poor student; on the contrary, of all his pupils Jude put in the most effort in learning the course material. It was more that Jude had a knack for asking questions; too many, in fact. Chemistry courses in Rieze Maxia were primarily about compounding herbs and minerals to make various medicines and healing salves. When he started courses in Elympios, he was bombarded with complex elements and reactions that were completely foreign to him. Jude often compared the lab setups to the traditional alchemist rigs he had fiddled with back in Fennmont, except these were far more complex and had many more parts that could be damaged if not handled carefully.

Thankfully, his lab partners were more concerned about their own grade than his participation, so they usually took to setting up the experiments on their own while Jude documented the process.

He listened as the lecture covered various solvents and their reactions, scribbling fervently into his notebook and copying diagrams onto the edges. They were to perform a simple experiment as an example of the course material they had studied earlier in the day.

Before he began handing out materials, the teacher took the time to go over safety and emergency procedures. "There's always at least one." He said, pointing to the lab safety poster on the white board.

But as Jude's team donned their smocks and began setting up the experiment, he was having a hard time keeping focused.

 _For all you know, an assassin could be masquerading as one of your classmates!_

Alvin's words echoed in the back of his mind. It seemed farfetched for Exodus to go so far for a student, but the more he thought about it, the more nervous he became. Jude started to look over his classmates, trying to discern any differences in their stance, their attire, anything that felt off. Shanna was wearing her hair differently, Mikael didn't have his usual wristband, Toby kept sloshing the florescent liquid in the tube with an amount of fascination no man should have for a chemical…

 _No, this is stupid._ Jude shook his head, choosing to scrutinize his notes instead of his classmates. _I'm being paranoid… There's no reason for me to act like this. Nothing is happening._

"Jude, you in there?" Mikael was looking at him, brow quirked, test tubes held aloft in both hands.

"Oh, sorry, what did you say?"

"I asked how much of each…"

Jude hastily went through his notes, finding the quantities specified and reciting them out loud. The group continued their work, side-eyeing Jude from time to time. "You know Jude, chem lab isn't the best place to space off. Maybe you should sit this one out?"

Mikael had a point, and as much as it pained him to admit, he wasn't in the best state of mind to be messing with dangerous chemicals.

"Right, sorry…" He set his notebook next to the rig and gave an awkward bow before heading to the back of the class. He pulled his textbook from his bag and propped himself next to the window, figuring going over the lab outline was about as close as he was getting to conducting the experiment himself.

 _Maybe it is too soon to go back to class…_ Jude sighed, flipping through the book in hopes of a distraction.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Put that thing down!"

There was a loud pop, like a firecracker being set off, sparks flying from one of the front lab tables. Several curses were hurled as one of the lab beakers started billowing a thick, black smoke into the air, more sparks and material shooting out of it.

The fire alarm sounded and the class erupted into a panic. "Everyone out!" the teacher shouted before he bailed with little regard for the safety of his pupils. It was like a stampede after, hundreds of students fleeing into the halls to escape the smoke and presumable fire that had occurred in the lab. More popping, more screams, everyone panicking and running into the halls.

Except for Jude.

Students and teachers pushed against the exit doors, trying to escape all at once, stepping over each other in sheer terror as the room filled with smoke. Shouting, pleas for escape, the telltale pop-pop-pop of explosions from Maxwell knew what. And all the while Jude stood still, frozen in place while chaos whirled around him.

The acrid smoke that burned his eyes and nose, the sounds of explosions and screaming… the broken glass, the polished wood floors, the curtains behind him, and the blood on his hands. Suddenly Jude wasn't in chem lab anymore, he was back at the event hall with a broken body in front of him and there was blood, so much blood and they were shooting at him.

He couldn't see straight, he couldn't catch his breath. There were alarm bells all around him and within his head but he couldn't will his body to respond. Jude felt like he was going to die and he couldn't even find the strength to cry out. They were coming for him, they were going to _kill him_.

Arms wrapped around his waist and he lashed out, finally finding his voice as he started yelling. Jude tried to twist around and strike his adversary, but his eyes wouldn't focus, he couldn't concentrate. He couldn't even hear his own voice properly as he struggled, everything sounded so distant, as if he wasn't really there at all and this was all a nightmare conjured by too little sleep and too much stress.

Hands gripped his wrists almost painfully, forcing them to his sides and Jude wished he could think clear enough to remember any of the self-defense moves that Sonia had taught him when he was younger. His throat burned from the smoke, the effort of screaming. Even breathing hurt and he was quickly losing the battle between himself and his unknown assailant.

"Jude, get ahold of yourself!"

It was the first clear sentence he could comprehend and his struggling ceased. Jude registered rather belatedly that he was being lifted off the floor and into someone's arms. Alvin's arms. Alvin, who looked just as frightened as Jude. He ran to the nearest window and tore it open, pausing long enough for Jude to get a look at the crowd gathering in the courtyard below, the long drop below.

Jude could only hold on as Alvin jumped from the second floor down to the ground below, landing gracefully with Jude firmly in his arms.

It was then that Jude realized he was definitely not okay, and that Alvin knew it too.

When Jude came to, he was in a makeshift medical tent being looked over by emergency personnel for any signs of poisoning. They asked him questions, poked and prodded his eyes and tongue, checked for any signs of inflammation or burns. He had been in the lab quite a bit longer than his classmates, inhaling what he was informed was toxic smoke created by an improper mixture of leftover chemicals. By the end of it, he had been cleared to leave and told to go to the hospital if he started to feel ill.

He only realized once they were off campus that he hadn't spoken a word; that Alvin had been the one answering the paramedics and asking all the follow up questions.

Back at the apartment, he sat upon his bed with his knees to his chest, a blanket draped around his shoulders. From the kitchen he could hear the sound of clattering pans and running water, Alvin having said something about making them some grub while he rested.

 _Alvin… After all the grief I gave him, he still ran in to save me…_

It should have come as no surprise, Jude realized. Alvin was hired to protect him, and had run in to rescue him from a dangerous situation, just as a bodyguard should.

It wasn't an assassin or an Exodus agent, it was just some dumb kid messing with the wrong chemicals. Yet Jude had been overtaken by a fear he couldn't describe, completely unable to move.

He had read this in a book before; when people experienced something traumatizing, similar noises or smells could cause mental distress. It felt so much more complex than that, but giving it a name somehow made him feel better about his actions, as if a title could justify being so terrified that he couldn't escape a fire.

That didn't do much for his current state, however.

There was a soft knock, the door to his room sliding open to reveal Alvin with a tray of food. "I made soup." He announced, "Or at least tried. Half your pantry is expired."

Jude said nothing as Alvin set the tray on the nightstand, taking a seat next to him on the bed. "Well the good news is, classes are canceled for the rest of the week. Guess you're getting that vacation after all."

Jude could only nod, staring at the book-covered floor in front of him.

"…You okay, kid?"

He wasn't, they both knew this, but something told him that Alvin wanted to hear it voiced.

"I… I thought they came for me…" He muttered, voice still hoarse from the smoke, "When it happened… I thought I was done for… And I was so scared that I couldn't move…" He was shaking again, his eyes burning not from smoke but from tears he was so desperately trying not to shed. Not in front of Alvin, anyone but Alvin…

He regretted it. Jude regretted telling Alvin to leave him be, for giving him such a hard time. He was there to keep him safe, right? Maybe not from Exodus, but from the terrors conjured in his own head.

"I just… I felt like I was there again… I could hear the gunshots, I could feel Dr. Haus's blood on my skin and I just…"

Alvin wrapped an arm around his shoulder and for a split second Jude was frozen up again, terrified. But Alvin's embrace was warm, gentle, and the panic slowly eased from his mind. Finally he lifted his head to meet his bodyguard's gaze, noting the bruise on his cheek from where he had been struck during Jude's episode.

"Look, Jude… You don't need to put on a strong face. Literally no one expects that of you except you, and… bottling this kind of thing up isn't healthy." Alvin shook his head, his free hand coming up to run through his slickened locks. With a sigh he tugged Jude just a bit closer, holding him a little tighter. "I guess what I'm trying to say is… If you need to cry, go ahead and cry. I won't tell anyone. Promise."

"Alvin…" Those words, the warm embrace, they alone let the floodgates open. Jude buried his face in his knees and let out a shaking sob, wishing he could go back in time so that none of this had ever happened.

It was impossible, but at least Alvin was there to assure him he was safe.


	4. Chapter 4

After almost two weeks of staying with him, Alvin figured out a couple things about Jude.

First was that he was terrible at sleeping like a normal person. He spent a vast amount of time hunched over his desk, researching, studying, or tinkering with prototypes sent over from the lab. This would continue into the wee hours of the morning, when Jude would finally take note of the time and toddle off to bed.

More than once Alvin had woken from his light sleep to a distinct _thunk_ and he'd look up to see a book, device, or Jude's own head dropped upon the desk. The first few times Alvin had gotten up to tell him to go lay down, but after the fifth he had given up; Jude would go on his own eventually.

To make matters worse, Jude was not a morning person. Alvin always woke with ample time to shower, shave, style his hair, and dress for the day. Jude, however, would sleep past his alarms (all three of them) and continually beg for "five more minutes" until Alvin threatened to flip the mattress with him still on it. How this kid managed to not get kicked out of class for being late was completely beyond him.

The second thing he noted was just how abhorrent his diet was. Jude claimed to know how to cook, and to be actually skilled at it, and yet his pantry was barren and his fridge lacking much beyond canned coffee and instant meals. The only time he seemed to eat anything proper was when his friend Leia came knocking, carrying bags of takeout and chattering excitedly about the latest news around town.

That was the third thing; his best friend Leia. From what he had gathered, or rather what he had been told by the subject herself, Leia and Jude had grown up in the same town back in Rieze Maxia. She had introduced herself straight away, offering a hand to shake and taking note of his contact information, just so she could check up on things. She was a bright, cheerful girl, but a bit pushy. The two of them tended to bicker like siblings and more often than not it would end with Leia pouting for a few moments before changing the subject, completely forgetting why they were arguing in the first place.

Yet, in spite of their quarrels, they were obviously close. Alvin would venture a guess that she was one of the few friends he had, and likely the only one in the city.

And there was the fourth; Jude was, inexcusably, a recluse. He was intelligent, gifted even, but since Alvin had come to stay with him he had not asked to go anywhere, meet anyone, or even leave the apartment outside of attending classes. Jude was sixteen, yet his life focus was so far off from what a typical boy his age should have that Alvin was beginning to wonder if all geniuses were this stunted.

Had he always been like this? Or was this a new development, a characteristic gained after the incident? He thought to ask Leia about it, but figured it was information he didn't really need to know. Less going out meant less work, and a slimmer chance that anything would happen.

It also meant he was incredibly bored.

Alvin wasn't the type to sit idly all day; all his previous jobs involved a level of danger, of physical prowess and constant vigilance. But this gig… Aside from the incident at the school, Alvin's days had been filled with bad television dramas and trashy fashion magazines. These could only capture his attention for so long, and so Alvin began trying to talk to Jude, seeking a cure for the monotony of sitting on the couch all day.

"So what were you and Haus researching anyway?"

At his desk across the room, Jude paused in his thoughtful scribbles to look over his shoulder at Alvin. "You don't know?"

Alvin gave a half-hearted shrug, "I don't subscribe to scientific journals. Enlighten me."

Jude seemed to give up on his work for the time being and turned his chair to face Alvin proper. "We were researching a way to make spyrixes safer."

Spyrix, the machines used to power a vast majority of the technology used in Elympios. Up until the open border, it had been completely unheard of in Rieze Maxia, which only served to confuse Alvin further. "What do you mean?"

"You know how spyrixes work, right?"

Alvin shook his head. Jude sighed.

"Basically, spyrixes consume the energy of spirits. Once that power is gone, the spirit dies, just like any other creature. Because of this process, spirits have been gradually dying out in Elympios, affecting the climate and causing the wildlife to gradually die out along with the spirits."

Alvin vaguely recalled hearing about this in the paper; the discovery of the existence of spirits and their connection to the recent shortage of energy was a shock to many Elympions, who had gone their entire lives without knowing such fanciful things existed. It was the primary cause of the recent energy price hike, and the main driver for the open border treaties with Rieze Maxia.

"In Rieze Maxia," Jude continued, "Most of the population possesses what's called a _mana lobe_ , which allows us to give up a bit of our own energy in exchange for borrowing the power of the spirits. It's nearly a completely green cycle when it comes to conservation, and our society has grown without the use of spyrixes."

"So you intend to apply this to spyrixes?" Alvin inquired, somehow more interested in the subject now that Jude was explaining it instead of simply being a headline for a propaganda poster.

Jude nodded with a slight grin, "Elympions don't have mana lobes, and spirit channeling obviously can't be utilized for things like medical devices and GHS's, so we're trying to figure a way to combine the two theories without bringing harm to spirits."

"Without harming spirits… That's a mighty pragmatic goal there, Jude." A joke, one that Jude seemed to take far too seriously.

"It's important!" he countered, nearly hopping up out of his seat. Alvin could not help but wonder how many times Jude had had to defend his views on this matter, and just who was giving him such grief in the first place. "You've seen the effects of spyrix use. If all the spirits die, the land withers, lakes dry up, food becomes scarce, and illness runs rampant! I have to find a way to make these machines work without hurting anyone, before Rieze Maxia starts to look like Elympios…"

So that was it. It wasn't just because of some benevolent desire to help Elympions, it was also because the same would eventually happen to his own world, too. The kid had fire, that was fore sure, and Alvin couldn't help the smile that crept across his face as Jude spoke passionately about his goals. Seeing him get all sparkly-eyed about it almost brought a laugh to his lips, but he refrained. No need to make Jude feel like the butt of a joke.

Almost like he was half expecting to be belittled for his convictions, Jude turned around in his chair and began hastily writing again, as if the conversation had renewed his vigor in his research.

A glance at the clock above the television noted that it was past noon, and neither of them had eaten more than toast and coffee for breakfast. Alvin stood and headed for the kitchen, hoping to dig up something he could claim as sustenance for the two of them.

After going through what remained of the pantry, Alvin laid out his findings on the laminated countertop; a bag of crisps, a bottle of cayenne pepper, half a tin of instant coffee, and an expired can of soup. Nothing that could even be remotely considered a meal. When was the last time Jude had gone grocery shopping? Perhaps he was the type to just pick up meals on his way home; he was living alone, after all.

"Jeez, no wonder you're so small… You don't get any nutrition at all, do you?" Alvin quipped, a laugh in his voice.

Jude didn't even bother turning around, "Har, har, funny. If you're hungry, go to the store or something."

Alvin rounded the kitchen counter and stood behind Jude's chair, bracing both hands against the wooden back, "No good, Judy. We gotta stick together, remember?"

"I'm busy, Alvin," he stated flatly, barely acknowledging the man hovering over him, "And don't call me Judy."

The guard waved his hand flippantly, "Take a break. You've been at it all day. Besides, isn't today your day off?"

"I'm studying."

"Jude," Alvin braced a hand against the desk, leaning into Jude's field of vision, "You need to eat."

Finally Jude's pencil stilled and he sighed, his eyes rising up to his bodyguards with a vague hint of disdain in his gaze. "Fine… Let's just be quick, okay?"

"As quick as a bullet."

Jude visibly shuddered at the analogy.

The open air market in Trigleph was close to Jude's apartment. It stocked fresh fish, fruits, vegetables, meats; anything one could wish for when it came to a home-cooked meal. It was often crowded with locals, making it difficult to navigate at times, but it was the best place to get food without having to trek all the way to Marksburg.

Alvin led Jude through the throng of shoppers in search of something quick they could fix up for their lunch. So far, they had come across a stall selling dried bricks of what they were told was mabo curry. "Just add water and boil!" the merchant had said. Somehow Alvin wasn't entirely convinced that was all it took to make the famous Rieze Maxian dish.

"It needs vegetables," Jude had mentioned after eyeing the brown packet. "And rice. They sell at some at the stall down the way."

The fifth thing; in spite of the lack of supplies in his kitchen, Jude was apparently a decent cook. He cited his time living in Leronde, where he would play house with Leia and learn to cook alongside her father. The craft was perfected in the most unusual ways when he moved to Fennmont, where he mastered the art of cooking with instant ingredients and fire-spirit powered hot plates.

Alvin allowed Jude to lead the way, the boy clinging to his side like a magnet. It was then that Alvin noticed something amiss; not with the people around them, but with Jude. His eyes were constantly darting around his surroundings, as if surveying each and every person for any potential threat. Alvin noted the slight tremble to his hands as he picked through the pile of carrots and potatoes at the market stall, the way he stood almost too erect and refused to meet the merchant's gaze when he spoke.

All at once Alvin realized just how little they had been outside since coming to stay with him. They had ventured to and from the school once, and not again since the accident at the chem lab.

Jude was terrified, and Alvin was kicking himself for not realizing sooner.

He slung an arm around the shivering boy's shoulder and leaned closer to his face, "Here, let's pick up some onion, too." He suggested, plucking the white vegetable from the pile of produce, "You Rieze Maxians are partial to spicy foods, right? We can put that cayenne back at the apartment in it as well."

Jude almost smiled as he nodded, the shaking in his small frame ceasing altogether.

After two weeks and much time arguing, Jude was allowed back into Helioborg.

He was ecstatic, a clear spring in his step as he marched down the dirt trail leading from Trigleph to the military outpost. It was almost strange to see someone so excited about returning to work, but then again, Alvin's job wasn't exactly his passion. Jude's obviously was.

Once they arrived, Jude signed in at the gate and headed inside, stopping to talk animatedly to one of the patients who waved him down. It brought a bit of a smile to Alvin's face to see the boy so upbeat for once; the past few weeks had been rough on Jude, and this was just another step towards recovery.

But once they reached the elevator, Alvin was barred from entry.

"What do you mean I can't come up with him?" Alvin confronted the guard, convinced he couldn't see properly with the ridiculous helmet he was required to wear.

"Sorry, sir. Authorized personnel only on the upper floor."

Alvin scowled at the soldier, "I have to be authorized!" he insisted, "I've been hired to watch the kid!"

"Alvin…" Jude stepped over to him, his hands raised in the defensive, "It… It's fine. It's a secured area, so I should be okay, right?"

 _You don't know that…_ Alvin thought, but saw no reason to alarm Jude needlessly. He growled in the general direction of the soldier and crossed his arms, "Go straight to the lab. I'll be up there in a bit."

"But sir!" the soldier protested, but before he could go into another speech about authorization, Alvin turned on him again, "Get Bakur down here. He'll give you the authorization."

The soldier visibly tensed before radioing to his commander for clarification. Alvin took this time to give a more relaxed smile to Jude, "Go on, I'll catch up."

Jude nodded silently before shuffling into the elevator, leaving Alvin behind.

 _What a nuisance._

"Sir," the soldier was on his back again and Alvin had to actively resist the urge to knock his stupid helmet off his head, "You need to wait outside for my commanding officer to arrive."

Alvin quirked a brow, "And just how long is _that_ going to take?"

"He is en route from Marksburg."

"Marksburg, huh." Alvin sighed, scrubbing his hands against his face. No need to make a scene, he'd just have to leave for now.

Or so he wanted the soldier to believe.

No sooner did he exit the gate was he running down the corridors once again, surveying the outside of the base. That's one thing he never understood about Helioborg and its design; so many footholds, so many freestanding cables. It would be so easy to break into, even more so for someone who had been trained to do so. It was all too easy to scale the exterior of the first and second floors, and even easier to find an unlocked door on one of the terraces.

Ten flights of stairs later, Alvin had managed to make his way unnoticed to the hall labeled _Spyrix Research and Development_. Obviously, he was in the right place, but which of the doors had Jude, and which held certain ejection from the base and possibly his job? He lucked out, it would seem, when he overheard a familiar voice from down the hall.

"Have they tracked down the data that Professor Haus collected?"

It was Jude, obviously. He could recognize his Rieze Maxian inflections easily. But the second voice also proved recognizable, if only vaguely. Alvin crept closer to the door, sticking to the wall to avoid being spotted.

"Not so far. We're waiting for his family to finish clearing his estate. He refused to put a lot of his personal research on the computers here. Apparently he didn't trust them. I think he carried a disc on his person that had a lot of it."

"That sounds like Professor Haus. Still, it's strange that it's taking them so long." A pause, a slight sizzle of electricity against metal, "Did they… Did they find it when they recovered his…"

"No, he didn't have anything important, apparently. He probably hid it somewhere, knowing him."

 _Professor Haus's research…_ He had found the right door, but…

"Sir?"

So engrossed in his eavesdropping, Alvin hadn't even notice the click of heels approaching. Before him stood a woman with dark hair and glasses, dressed in the business casualwear so stereotypical of the Helioborg scientists.

"What are you doing here?" Then she gasped, taking a half step back, "You're not here to trouble Dr. Mathis, are you?"

"Whoa, whoa, hold on. I'm not here to _trouble_ him…" His hand slid towards the keypad, hoping to open the door long enough for him to make his escape into the lab and leave the woman behind before she could make a stink.

Too late. She grabbed for his arm, tugging it away from the keypad in a vain attempt to stop him,."Sir, you can't go in there! Please leave!" she shouted, surely catching the attention of every guard on the floor. Alvin yanked his arm away, managing to smack his elbow against the keypad at just the right angle, the door sliding open behind him.

"Dr. Balan! Dr. Mathis! Help!" she shouted as Alvin made a break for the lab, running straight for Jude. But before he could get there, another person blocked his path and he was forced to stop short to avoid colliding with him

"Alfred? What are you doing here?" The source of the familiar voice suddenly became apparent as Alvin stared blankly at the man smirking at him, arms crossed. Suddenly it made sense why Haus and Jude had ended up setting up shop in Helioborg.

"Balan…" Alvin breathed, his stress level suddenly shooting through the roof, and not entirely for the reason one would expect.

The older man smirked and planted a hand on his hips, "Surprised to see me? It _has_ been quite a while since you stopped by."

"Balan, do you know Alvin?" Jude, of course, was ever the observant one. Alvin groaned inwardly, wishing he had waited for the commander to arrive just so he could avoid the awkward reunion.

He crossed his arms, expression less-than-pleased, "Yes, regrettably. He's my cousin."

And then, to make matters worse, Balan started to laugh. Not just a chuckle, but a knee-slapping guffaw. "Oh, this is rich! So the bodyguard Jude was assigned was _you_ , Alfred? What a small world!" His attention turned to Jude, almost completely unable to stop laughing, "Hey, Jude, you remember the little cousin I was talking about that cried whenever he had a stomachache?"

"Balan, I _swear_ to Maxwell…"

Jude snorted, a hand quickly coming up to cover his mouth, "You're joking! The Alfred you keep talking about is _Alvin_?"

Alvin buried his face in his hand, sighing morosely. "Spare me, _please_."

He couldn't escape, not when Balan continued to laugh and began telling more embarrassing stories about their shared childhood. Balan was family, and someone who had stuck by him even with the ongoing feud surrounding them, but more than once Alvin was tempted to toss the crippled man out into the hall just to spare himself the embarrassment.

Yet in the end, he couldn't do it, and the reason being was the laughter they brought Jude. Even if it was at his expense, it was… strangely nice to see the boy actually smiling and laughing.

And somehow, that made the humiliation worth it.

Surprisingly, Balan left the lab at a decent hour. He had implored Jude to do the same, and Jude had agreed, yet somehow it was nearly one in the morning and Jude was still tinkering away at his worktable.

At that point, Alvin had taken up the couch, keeping himself occupied with the discarded magazines, courtesy of the very apologetic researcher Mary that had tried to bar his entry earlier in the day. She, too, had left the building, leaving just him and Jude in the lab. It was almost eerie to be hanging out in the military base with no one in sight; Alvin was fairly certain most of the guards had left for the evening, or had taken up posts outside. Were they even aware he was up there? The commander hadn't found him, so he assumed that his access to the upper floors was still very much unauthorized.

 _Oh well, I'll sort it in the morning._

Alvin tossed the well-read magazine onto the floor before sitting up, stretching languidly upon the worn couch before seeking out Jude in the dim light. As expected, the boy genius was still at his desk, head nodding to the side, a soldering iron in one hand, a roll of filament in another. Alvin's eyes rolled as he stood, plucking the tool from Jude's hand and turning it off. "Did Balan ever tell you not to deal with dangerous tools while you're impaired?"

"I'm not impaired. I'm just repairing." Jude protest, rubbing his eyes as he blindly reached for the misplaced soldering iron.

Alvin set it aside, reaching to turn Jude's chair and hoist him up. "C'mon, smartass. If you stay up all night working on that thing, you'll become weird and creepy like Balan."

Jude stood almost too easily, swaying slightly before Alvin steadied him, "Balan isn't creepy. He's just… No, that's a lie, he's a little creepy."

The guard snorted at the comment and lead Jude over to the couch. "Right, see my point? Now get some sleep. We have to walk back to Trigleph tomorrow morning so you can shower before class."

Jude made something of a non-committal groan before curling up on the couch, not even bothering to remove his coat or shoes. Alvin wasn't about to wrestle them off him; he merely pulled the knitted blanket from the back of the couch over the sleepy researcher.

For a moment, Alvin just stood, watching, observing Jude. The boy was only sixteen, yet he was already a full-fledged doctor working to better the lives of millions. And yet, even with the degree under his belt, he was still a kid unaware of the world and how it worked. Alvin wished he could live like Jude did; constantly striving to better his work, persevering through ridicule and racism alike for the sake of a common goal. He was naïve, yet knowing this, he continued on the path he believed in, and people believed in him.

He envied him.

Alvin's phone buzzed in his pocket, and a glance at the display brought a scowl to his face. He stepped out of the lab and into the empty hall, the sound of his steps echoing among the faint hum of the emergency lights.

A number was dialed and after only a brief pause, the line connected.

" _Report_." A stern voice, one he knew well, but wish he hadn't.

"Yeah, I've got it under control."

" _And his progress?_ "

"He hasn't found anything… It looks like the data wasn't on him or with-"

" _Are you certain? He's unaware?_ "

"No, J-" Alvin almost slipped, "The _target_ knows nothing. He's having to start again…"

" _And you know what needs to be done if he finds anything._ "

"I'm well aware, but…"

" _Good. Tomorrow, a group of radicals intend to start a disturbance in the square in Trigleph. Make sure you and the boy are there._ "

" _What?_ " Another attack? "You're shi- Is that _really_ necessary?"

" _It is imperative that he trusts you entirely, Alfred, lest he never reveal if he knows anything. If you cannot handle at least this, then I'll be forced to terminate him and bring in a new researcher. Is that clear?_ "

A harsh ultimatum indeed. Alvin pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration, "…Yes. Send the coordinates so I can prepare…"

" _Good. I expect a report afterwards on his condition._ "

"…Understood, Uncle."

The phone was snapped closed and Alvin had to resist the urge to throw it against a wall.


	5. Chapter 5

Since they had left the lab at dawn, Alvin had been messaging someone almost constantly. His phone would buzz, he'd flash a brief smile or frown, type a quick message, then pocket his phone, only to do it all again a few minutes later. Jude felt it strange for him to be so avidly interested in a GHS conversation when they were out in the open; shouldn't he be keeping an eye out for any potential attackers? Or did he feel they were both safe at the moment and they could relax?

 _It'd be great if he could convey that to me so_ I _could relax…_ Jude sighed and took a seat on one of the benches overlooking the ship's deck, watching the currents flow around the vessel.

Commuting to and from Helioborg had become easier recently. With the Spyrius Corporation funding all the new projects, the increase in workers prompted a new seahaven to be constructed. It was small, with space for only two commuter ferries and a supply ship, but it was far easier than hiring the amount of guards needed to escort the civilian workers through Torbalan. That, and the ferry cut down the commute time significantly; Jude could get across the bay in under an hour, as opposed to taking two hours or longer depending on the level of beast activity.

It was less dangerous as well, for which Jude was grateful. He was dedicated to his job, but that dedication meant late hours, and traversing the highroad late at night often left him with cuts and bruises from run-ins with hungry monsters. Nothing a good healing spell couldn't fix, but it was the principal of the thing.

Jude's eyes drifted to Alvin, who was _still_ messaging someone, and his disgruntled face and hectic typing cued him on the current mood of the conversation. Was he having an argument with someone? His boss? A friend? A lover?

His eye twitched at the last possibility, but for what reason he couldn't tell.

Fed up with the silence, Jude spoke up. "Hey, Alvin? Who are you talking to?"

Alvin's hand stilled and his head whipped around, his eyes falling on Jude who was, at the moment, staring up at him, arms crossed. Alvin gave a weak chuckle and pocketed his phone, ignoring the next two buzzes as he responded. "Don't you worry your little head about it, Jude. It's just boring adult stuff."

Jude quirked a brow. "Boring adult stuff? I'm not a kid, you know."

To that, Alvin chuckled again, and turned to lean his back against the railing, propping his elbows on the metal bar. "With a reaction like that, I'd say you are. It's nothing, really. Just a debate with someone."

"A debate? With who?" He looked far too into the conversation for it to be someone he didn't care about. This was something Jude didn't like about Alvin; he avoided anything even remotely close to his personal life. Even after they had spent this much time together, Jude hadn't learned anything past his love for fashion and good booze. Anytime the topic ventured in the direction of his life, Alvin would expertly reroute the conversation to something else. Jude was unsure if this was due to his line of work, or for personal reasons, but it was a bit daunting knowing so little about someone that was living with him.

At his inquiry, Alvin merely shrugged. "A man is entitled to his secrets."

 _There he goes again_. "I bet it's a woman," Jude accused, shaking his head.

Even Alvin had to laugh at that. "What, are you jealous, Jude? Should I message you more?"

"Messaging me would be pointless if you're standing next to me!" Jude countered. "And besides, any woman who dates you must have poor taste."

"Ouch!" Alvin gripped his chest. "You wound me, Jude. However will I recover from that sick burn? I may need to see a doctor!" He nudged at Jude's side just for affect, grinning mischievously.

Jude gave an exasperated sigh and returned to the railing. "Whatever, I need to shower when we get back then head out. I have a lecture this afternoon."

"No time for a nap?"

"I want to get there early." Jude shook his head, though the man's sentiment was noted. Was Alvin really all that concerned about his sleeping habits? He got a few hours last night, he'd be fine…

Alvin shrugged and sighed. "All right, but you should go to bed at a decent hour tonight. Kids your age should enjoy their free time, not spend all of it glued to books and paperwork."

A glare was cast his way. "Stop calling me a kid. I'm old enough to attend university and hold a high-profile job, you can at least treat me like an adult."

"That's a pretty childish thing to say."

Jude frowned deeply and was about to retort when his own GHS buzzed. He pulled it from his pocket and flipped the screen open. Two messages from Leia.

 _tell alvin he DOES look like that frog! :[_

 _it has his droopy eyes and everything!_

Attached was a cartoon depiction of a frog, and suddenly Jude was snickering. "Have you been talking to Leia all this time?"

Now it was Alvin's turn to frown. "She asked for my number when she came over the first time. Why?"

"She says you look like a frog." Jude turned the device around for Alvin to see the message. "I agree."

Alvin groaned inwardly and scrubbed his face. "I can't handle you kids."

"Serves you right."

Trigleph was just as busy as one would expect on a weekday morning. The commuters were making their way to and from the station and docks, ready for the day. Save for Jude, of course, who trudged along beside Alvin with bleary eyes and unkempt hair. Adrenaline kept him upright on the ferry ride in, but that had long since worn off once they arrived in the city.

"How're people so _active_ this early in the morning…" Jude asked, bringing a hand up to stifle a yawn before glancing Alvin's way. "What time is it anyhow?"

Alvin pulled his phone from his pocket, checking the time before tucking it away again. "I wouldn't call it early. It's half past nine."

"That's early, Alvin." Jude groused, running his hands through his dark locks. He winced when his fingers caught on a tangle. _I really need to shower…_ Perhaps Alvin was right about his sleeping habits; Jude did tend to keep odd hours, and he caught himself dozing off more and more during the day. Not for not trying, of course. Jude had made an effort to get more sleep, even just an hour or two, yet somehow time always managed to get away from him when he was in the middle of his work.

It was an unexpected benefit of Alvin's constant presence; having him around meant an alarm clock he couldn't sleep through and a constant reminder that he required sleep. It was like having a roommate. A roommate that somehow had his life together far better than Jude did.

Once they arrived at the apartment, Jude shed his shoes and lab coat, tossing them onto the couch before shutting himself in the bathroom. It was one of the few places in his home that Alvin did not follow. It wasn't for his privacy; Alvin had followed him into public bathrooms on a number of occasions, citing it was one of the best places for Jude to be attacked. But at home, without any windows and only one door, it was merely unnecessary.

For a long moment, Jude stood beneath the steady stream of hot water and collected himself. The heat relaxed his weary joints and tense muscles. With a sigh, he allowed his mind to decompress. He had been doing better lately; he didn't feel so scared of going out, and he found he wasn't constantly on the lookout either. It felt like things were finally starting to calm down around him, the excitement of the attack just a few weeks ago dying off, leaving those involved to pick up the pieces.

Yet there was a strange sort of peace with that; with Alvin around, Jude didn't feel as if he needed to worry about the dangers of another attempt on his life. He supposed that was the intended purpose of having a bodyguard; to make you feel safe while you went about your daily life. That lead Jude to wonder what would happen after Alvin was released from his duty. Would he still be safe? Would they wait for the attackers to be apprehended? Or just for his project to be finished? Jude supposed if he finished and went home to Leronde he'd be all right, but… What if they didn't stop at the border? What if they continued chasing him simply for finishing his work? If Alvin wasn't getting paid, he wouldn't follow him, wouldn't protect him…

Jude pressed his back against the cheap tile of the standing shower and he forced himself to take a slow, deep breath. _I can't do this…_ he thought. _If I finish then Alvin will leave, and I'll have to go back to looking over my shoulder… What do I do? Will I ever be safe?_

A sudden knock on the door startled him out of his reverie and Jude nearly jumped out of his skin, his hand knocking over the small array of soap bottles on the shelf. His mind flashed to all the possibilities of who could be on the other side of the door, who could be coming for him, until—

"Hey, kid, you okay in there?" Alvin. Of course it was Alvin. Who else would it be?

Jude took a second to calm his erratic breathing before sliding the shower door open to answer. "Yeah, I'm fine." His voice cracked slightly and he grimaced, clearing his throat. "What's up?"

"Are you sure you don't want to take a nap or something?" Alvin asked, his concerned voice muffled by the door. "You didn't sleep much last night."

 _A nap does sound nice, but…_ Jude shook his head even though Alvin couldn't see it. "No, it's better that I just power through it and sleep when I get back. If I nap, I'll sleep right through the lecture."

"You can always skip lecture, you know." It was a weak, but valid argument, yet Jude wasn't inclined to play hooky just because he worked too late the night before. Even though he had been tardy a number of times, he never actually missed a class. Many of his professors docked points if you missed more than a few days, and Jude wanted to save those for emergencies.

That didn't mean he wasn't tempted.

Jude slid the glass door shut again and went about his bathing regiment, effectively cutting off any means of protest Alvin could offer.

Somehow the square seemed more crowded than usual, not even with the usual businessmen and commuters, but with visitors as well. It was one of the biggest cities in Elympios, yet even knowing this there seemed to be an unreasonable amount of people wandering around it.

Balan had mentioned that Trigleph had one of the highest cost-of-living rates in the area, and that many people chose to live in the outlying towns and made the commute to save money. It would definitely save him a good chunk of gald, but the convenience of being within walking distance of school and just a ferry away from work beat riding a train multiple times a day.

"Is there an event going on?" He asked of Alvin, who pulled out his phone and brought up the calendar.

"I think today was supposed to be the United Market in Marksburg."

"Oh, that was today?" With all the goings-on, Jude had completely lost track. The monthly United Market allowed vendors from both sides of the border to sell within Marksburg without having to pay the international tariffs normally imposed to regulate trade. The increase in variety and decrease in cost brought shoppers from all around to stock up on goods they couldn't normally obtain. These crowds often spilled further inland, with Trigleph becoming a hotspot for the newest fashion trends not found in Rieze Maxia.

Jude himself usually took advantage of this to buy produce only available in his homeland. His mouth watered at the thought of fresh napples and poranges from the orchards in Hamil, and the fresh caught fish that only swam off the coast of Sharilton and served over rice…

"Jude, you're drooling."

Jude jumped, quickly wiping his mouth with the back of his sleeve, only to find it completely dry. He aimed a pout Alvin's way, cheeks lightly flushed. "Jerk."

Alvin gave a chuckle and clapped him on the back. "You sure you don't want to skip class? We could go to the market before they close up for the day."

Tempted, sorely tempted. "No, I'll-"

Jude was cut off mid-retort when he suddenly smacked face-first into the back of another pedestrian, falling back with an indignant squawk. "S-sorry, I…" He froze when his eyes met with whom he had run into; a tall man, pale with silvery hair accented with crimson streaks. He wore a suit of indigo and black, one Jude recognized as a designer brand that he had caught Alvin, and carry a briefcase in each hand. But perhaps what struck him speechless was his eyes, barely visible beneath his locks and glaring almost hatefully down at Jude. He said nothing, not even a remark on his clumsiness, before turning away and disappearing into the crowd.

A shudder ran through his thin frame. _Scary…_

"You all right, kid?" Alvin knelt at his side, picking up his books that spilled onto the sidewalk when he fell.

"Yeah, I…"

"It's not too late to go back and sleep," Alvin said, and there was no play in his voice, only concern. "You're really out of it today."

Jude sighed and carefully stood, dusting off his pants. _Maybe I should consider going back…_ He took his bag back from Alvin and slung it over his shoulder. "Maybe, but…"

There was a startled yelp somewhere behind him, and the clamor of footsteps against pavement as a group of men pushed their way to the center of the square. A dozen of them, all with sunglasses, medical masks, black fatigues… and guns.

"Listen up, Rieze Maxians!" shouted a man from the center of the group, drawing the attention of the mass of visitors. "Your fool king may believe that peace can reign between monsters and men, but we proud Elympions will not stand to have the heathens tainting our land!"

Jude stared, the feeling of dread filing his chest as he looked to Alvin for answers. "A protest?" He asked quietly, but something told him these were not mere demonstrators exercising their right to picket.

Alvin's angered expression confirmed this. "Jude, we need to go."

"What?"

There was a collective gasp as the guns were lifted into place, pointed directly at the people gathered around the square. "We of Exodus will purge the filth from these lands! Men, destroy the Rieze Maxian scum that plagues us!"

 _Exodus_.

Jude felt his blood go cold, frozen in fear. Exodus, the anti-Rieze Maxian group. Exodus, the terrorists. Exodus, the ones that killed Professor Haus.

" _Jude!_ "

All at once he was forced onto the ground as the terrorists opened fire, Alvin shielding him with his body as bullets sprayed into the crowd. Their leader cackled insanely as people yelled and screamed around him. Jude couldn't see, but he could hear the cries of pain, the men and women alike crumpling to the cobblestone as others climbed over them to escape the chaos. He wanted to scream, he wanted to run, but Alvin was holding him down and even if he hadn't been, he would've been too terrified to move.

More gunfire, more shouts of dismay, calls for the guards, for anyone to stop the madness. And through it all was Alvin, his voice stern, lips pressed against the crown of his head. "When I say go, I'm going to let you up, and you're going to run as fast as you can back to the apartment."

"What about you?" In spite of his fears, Jude's first thought was not of himself, but of others, of Alvin. "And these people… We have to help them!"

"Don't worry about them!" Alvin scolded, his arms bracing on either side of Jude as someone stepped on the man's back, tripped, then scampered away. Not once did he allow any weight on Jude, using his own body as a shield from anything that might bring him to harm. "These guys aren't messing around. We need to get you out of here."

"But…"

Another scream, this time closer, and from beneath the fabric of Alvin's jacket Jude could see a man collapsing to the ground, his blood seeping onto the stone. Dead.

Jude squeezed his eyes shut, and Alvin's grip only tightened.

"You're too important," Alvin whispered, almost too quiet for Jude to hear. He nodded silently against his chest.

The weight left him entirely and suddenly Alvin was towering over him, gun cocked and aimed straight ahead. He fired two bullets, both landing into the chest of the proclaimed ringleader of the attack. An opening.

"Run! Now!"

Jude scrambled to his feet and broke into a sprint, pushing his way through the mass of horrified pedestrians making their escape. More shots in the distance, more of his fellow countrymen shrieking, begging for mercy. And all he could do was keep running, because if he didn't, he'd be next.

But that was it, wasn't it? Those people, Exodus… They weren't just after Rieze Maxians in general. They had killed Professor Haus, and the entire reason why Bakur hired a bodyguard for him was because _he_ was a target, not just the people of his country.

It was this thought that stopped Jude in his tracks.

 _They're after me._

The guilt that struck him was unlike any he had felt before.

 _These people are getting hurt, because of me._

Another round of gunfire in the distance; streams of bloodied and injured civilians limping their way to safety. Jude watched as a woman hobbled along, unable to keep up with the crowd, a gash along her leg. She made it only a few more steps before collapsing mere feet from him, sobbing in agony as others bashed into her, caring not for her injuries as they fled.

She was Elympion, Jude realized. Exodus had fired indiscriminately into the crowd, not even caring if their own people were caught in the fray.

 _Because of me._

His body moved without thinking, crouching before the woman, pressing his hands against her wounded leg. Jude took a deep, steadying breath, and focused his mana, willing the skin to mend. For a moment the woman stared, eyes filled with tears and fright both.

"What are you doing?" She asked, voice shaking. Had she not seen Spirit Artes before?

"Don't worry, I'm a doctor," he said, trying for the most clinical voice he could muster under such pressure.

Somehow, she looked even more frightened, "You're… You're one of them, aren't you? Rieze Maxian."

There was really no denying it, not when he was already pouring energy into healing her injuries. "Please hold still, I'll have you fixed in no time." A small smile graced his features when the tear in the skin began to slowly stitch together. _I can do something. I can help._

His hand was smacked away before he could finish.

"Don't touch me, you monster!" She shrieked. "It's because of you that this happened!"

Jude stared at her, stunned, as she forced herself to her feet again, caring little of the freshly closed wound tearing open again from her struggles. She pushed past Jude, as if he was the enemy all along. As if he was something to fear.

All the while Jude could only stare, his heart sinking in his chest.

 _Monster._

 _Because of you this happened._

 _Because of you!_

"Because of… me…"

A bullet whizzed over his head and Jude hardly had time to duck before another barrage came his way. He couldn't tell if the fire was coming from Exodus, the guards, or both, but they had moved beyond the square and into the streets. How long would this go on before the authorities got it under control? Jude didn't know; he could only crouch on the ground with his hands over his head, begging for it to be over.

Jude was grabbed roughly by the back of his shirt and wrenched upright. With a gasp he was dragged to his feet by none other than Alvin, and if looks could kill, he'd be dead upon impact.

"The hell did you stop running for?! Do you have a death wish?!"

Jude blinked rapidly, a mix of relief and renewed fear filling his chest, "I-I was trying to help and…"

A group of black-clad men rounded the corner, stopping when they spotted the pair. Alvin cursed openly and fired a warning shot in their direction, running in the other, forcing Jude along with him.

"Go, go, _go_!"

The two sprinted onward, weaving through the escaping mob, Alvin at Jude's back, putting himself between him and any danger that could come his way. A shot sounded, this one too close for comfort, and Alvin stumbled, muttering another colorful phrase before firing a shot behind him. It quickly became clear that just running wasn't going to get them to safety, not with this many people and more agents coming their way. Alvin dragged hold of Jude's shirt again and ducked into an alleyway, pulling him into the darkness.

Alvin pressed Jude against the wall and waited, watching like a hawk as the assailants rushed past the entry, pursued by the military.

Safe, for now.

Jude let a sigh of relief, the tension leaving his limbs all at once. "We made it…"

His rest was short-lived; Alvin grabbed ahold of his collar and gave him a firm shake, rage flashing across his eyes. "What the _hell_ were you trying to pull back there? Why did you stop running?!" he shouted, mere inches from Jude's face. "Those guys were out for your blood and you just stop halfway down the street?!"

"I was trying to help!" he protested, pushing the man off as best as he could. But Alvin remained close, his anger practically radiating off his skin.

"They don't _want_ your help!" Alvin shook him again. "You're the reason they're in this mess, don't you get that?!"

"I'm… That's not…!" Jude shoved Alvin back, holding him at arm's length. "How can you say that?!" he shouted, shaking his head, the beginnings of tears pricking at his eyes. "I didn't _do_ anything! Are you saying Exodus attacked all those people because of me!?"

Those words caused Alvin to falter, his gaze falling away from Jude. "I didn't mean it like that."

Jude scowled, clutching at the silk of Alvin's shirt. "Then how did you mean it, Alvin?!"

For a long moment, Alvin refused to look at him, brows furrowed, teeth grit. Finally his hands came up and tugged at Jude's, loosening them from his lapels. "It's not you, but the Rieze Maxians," Alvin said, voice low, his vermillion eyes finally connecting with Jude's amber. "The Elympion people will see this as another reason to hate your people. Exodus is just a group of people; they can't single handedly stop Rieze Maxians from coming to their land, so they incite unrest with their actions."

Suddenly there was some sense to Alvin's words. "And if they make the Elympions hate Rieze Maxians…" The woman's words echoed in his head. ' _Because of you… This wouldn't have happened…_ '

Alvin nodded, leaning heavily against the brick opposite Jude. "Then Rieze Maxians eventually stop coming to Elympios for fear that they'll be next."

It made sense, yet somehow something didn't feel right. Yes, they came from different worlds, but their people were not all that different. That, and researchers like Jude were brought over to help Elympios, to solve their energy crisis. And the participants of the United Market brought fresh fruits and vegetables that couldn't grow in the dying region for everyone to enjoy. Why? Why did they insist on driving his people out?

' _Monster!_ '

"They're afraid of us, because of what we can do with the help of spirits." Jude murmured, his gaze falling to his hands, the sticky red that was there.

 _Blood? From that woman? Or…_

His eyes darted to Alvin as the man ambled towards the opposite entrance, leaning heavily to his left, "Let's go back to the apartment. The police should have things under control…" He staggered, barely catching himself on the brick before he could fall.

"Alvin!" Jude rushed to his side, steadying him as best as he could. It was then he saw it; the blood seeping onto Alvin's shirt, a tear just beneath his ribs, a bullet wound. "You idiot! Why didn't you say anything?"

"I'm fine." Alvin waved him off, pushing away from the wall again. "Let's just get to the apartment, I have a first aid kit in my stuff."

Jude pressed his hands against the wound, provoking a pained curse from Alvin. He didn't ask permission, he didn't try to offer the clinical comfort he was taught to give his patients when performing emergency first aid; he just focused on healing Alvin, even as his mana lobe strained, out of practice from months of disuse.

All the while, Alvin stared awe at the boy before him. "Jude, you…"

"We're not monsters," Jude muttered, voice trembling, breathless. The alley around them started to move of its own accord, a fog filling his head from the sudden outpouring of mana, but Jude refused to stop until the wound was completely closed. "We're people, too, and we just want to help."

The boy let a shaky breath and pulled away, bracing a hand against the brick to steady himself. He watched with a vague sense of satisfaction as Alvin gingerly lifted his shirt, finding the skin there coated in blood, but otherwise unmarred.

"I didn't know you could do that." Alvin's mesmerized gaze returned to Jude, who smiled in return.

"I told you before," he chuckled, scrubbing at his eyes with the back of his sleeve. "I'm a doctor, and I want to help people." In spite of his efforts, the tears finally slid down his cheeks.

Alvin clutched Jude's shoulder, trying to get a better look at his face. "What are you crying for?"

Jude shook his head, smiling through his tears. "I'm just… relieved. I was able to heal you just fine, even though I'm not that strong." He wasn't able to save Professor Haus, or help the woman at the square, but he was able to help Alvin, heal him fully. He hadn't failed, and for that he felt so happy he wanted to cry.

A hand came to rest upon his head, gently ruffling his hair, an action he was quickly coming to associate with Alvin. He brought his teary gaze up to meet the Alvin's, who smiled in return.

"You did good, Jude."


	6. Chapter 6

"Are you sure you're up for work?" Jude asked, casting a worried gaze up at Alvin as they traversed the short distance from the ferry docks to Helioborg. In spite of the chaos around them, things had returned to normal the following morning. This was due almost entirely to Alvin's insistence that he was fine, and that Jude had healed him enough that he didn't need to take any days off. Jude wasn't so inclined to believe him; he had found out firsthand just how much Alvin liked to play down his injuries, even critical ones. He wondered if this was due to his line of work, or some other conviction engrained in the snarky mercenary.

Jude didn't feel it his place to ask.

"I'm fine, Jude." Alvin said, casting him a spirited grin in return and patting him on the back. "I'm not the type of guy that a bullet can take down."

"A bullet can take anyone down if aimed right, Alvin." Jude groused, giving Alvin a jab in the side, causing the man to wince. "And just because I healed you doesn't give you the excuse to act reckless."

Alvin mocked offense, a hand pressed to his chest. "Me? Reckless? Perish the thought!"

Jude groaned at his antics. He was glad that he was able to help Alvin, there was no doubting that, but there were things weighing on his mind now, things he hadn't considered.

Exodus, the terrorists that claimed they wished to purify the land of Rieze Maxians, had openly attacked one of the busiest cities on their home turf. Not only that, but there had been dozens of casualties from both sides of the border, yet the anger and outrage from the people didn't seem to change a thing. Wouldn't an attack on a public space like that call for more guards to be put on patrol? Why did it take them so long to arrive at the square? And why hadn't the parliament made a statement?

It must have been a media nightmare to have a terrorist attack a public venue, and even more so when a second attack took place in only a few weeks. But Jude couldn't help but wonder why everyone seemed so relaxed about it. If something like that had occurred in Rashugal, the chief of staff would have the military lock down every port and highroad to make sure the culprits didn't escape. Hell, if it happened in Auj Oule, the King's personal army would have been dispatched to remedy the situation.

Yet, the Elympion Parliament was completely silent. The attack made the news, but no public officials had made a statement. It was odd, and unsettling, and Jude knew it was because the attacks were directly related to the presence of his people in Trigleph.

It left a poor taste in his mouth, especially Alvin's words the day before.

' _You're the reason they're in this mess.'_

The comment was directed at Rieze Maxians as a whole, but it still hurt. The death of his mentor, the attack on the square… Jude blamed himself for them, even though he knew it was useless to think that way. The sinking feeling he felt whenever he thought about those incidents, the gripping fear, the guilt, it all made him want to curl up in a corner and vomit. But at the same time he knew if he did, it'd only make things worse. _What if I can't complete Haus's work? What if I'm not smart enough to figure it out? What if all these people really_ did _die because of me? What if the attacks just get more violent and eventually…_

"Jude."

Jude physically jumped when his name was spoken, breaking him from his nihilistic thoughts. Before he could properly answer, Alvin draped an arm around his shoulder and pulled him close, leaning close to his face. "You're thinking too much. Just focus on your work, yeah?" Alvin winked, and Jude fought the blush on his cheeks from having him so close.

Yet another thing plaguing his mind; Alvin. How could he be so calm when he could have died the day before? When he saw his own brethren shot just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time? Jude admired his strength, his ability to keep going even when Jude himself wanted to hide in the lab until his research was complete or the world stopped turning, whichever came first.

"Right, sorry." Jude was, however, grateful that Alvin didn't pry. These were things he wasn't ready to share with anyone, let alone the seemingly care-free bodyguard that had been thrust upon him.

 _I just hope this is all over soon._

* * *

The lab was in an uproar when they arrived. Balan was hastily rifling through a large crate of papers while Mary skittered about the room, pinning pages to corkboards and displays in an attempt to organize it all. Jude would have been surprised if this level of excitement wasn't normal for the team whenever either of them made a breakthrough.

"This is a goldmine! Why did it take so long to arrive?" Balan shouted, pulling another stack from the box and flipping through the contents. "There's so much in here! The old codger really _was_ holding out on us!"

"What's going on?" Jude finally made his presence known, tugging on his labcoat as he approached his colleague.

Balan grinned brightly and held up a binder labeled _Spirit Channeling in relevance to the size of the Channeler's Mana Lobe_. "They just arrived from Professor Haus's estate! It's all his research material that was missing from the lab!"

"The professor's research?"

Jude nearly knocked Balan off his feet in his excitement, leaning over the edge of the crate and pulling stacks of papers and notebooks and piling them onto the table. Research notes, theses, unpublished theories, hand drawn diagrams… It was a mountain of knowledge that might have been lost to the world if these materials never made it to the lab. A gift, a blessing, a chance to finally get their research on the road.

The binders were all neatly labeled, but the contents were messy, a smatter of ideas across multiple pages of rambling theories and charts. It wasn't the first time Jude had come across the professor's notes; the man was brilliant, but like many brilliant minds, he left the cleanup and organization to his assistants, Jude included. His first two weeks of internship were spent putting these very binders together, tidying all the pages into content-specific books to be used for reference later.

It had been time-consuming, and at the time he had almost regretted taking the position, but seeing all of their hard work again after so long made him feel nostalgic. It felt like he was holding a piece of his past, a simpler time, where all he wanted to do was learn and follow in Haus's footsteps.

Jude missed that, he really did.

"This is brilliant stuff." Balan pulled another notebook from the crate, skimming over the pages. "But… None of it seems to be related to his most recent research…"

Jude continued his dig into the crate, finding more notebooks, and sadly, recognizing a majority of them. "This must be the research work he had done before coming to Elympios." Jude said, setting another binder onto the worktable. "Most of these I had to put together myself, actually. It was a good way to learn the material when we first started working together."

One of the notebooks was plucked from the pile by Alvin, who looked over it with mild curiosity. "So none of this stuff is even worth having here, huh?"

"I wouldn't say that, exactly." Jude leaned over the edge of the crate, having to stand on his tip toes to reach further in. "A lot of this stuff is unknown to Elympions, so maybe it'd be worth look-" He paused, spotting something near the bottom of the box, a stack of binders he didn't recognize. "What's this?" He reached for it, scooting the other binders out of the way to reveal a small stack of notebooks, new ones, with printouts with Elympion writing sticking out of them.

"Hey, Balan, I think I found someth-" Jude slipped from the edge of the crate and fell headfirst into the materials, landing with an startled yelp. He managed to right himself among the papers as both Balan and Alvin peered down at him, trying not to laugh. Embarrassed, Jude held up the stack of notebooks with a sheepish grin. "Uh… here."

The notebooks were handed over to Balan, who immediately began scouring the numerous pages. The grin on his face widened and he held their findings aloft, "This is it!" Balan proclaimed. "These are his research notes!" He took the papers over to Mary, who began pulling down unneeded notes and replacing them with the new ones.

Jude struggled to escape the metal prison that was the shipping crate, finding his height to be a disadvantage, as usual. Thankfully, Alvin was there to offer a helping hand, or in this case, grab him under the arms and pulling him bodily from the crate. Once again he was grinning to mask his embarrassment. "T-thanks…"

"Got a little excited there, huh?" Alvin teased, setting him on his feet. "Is the stuff in that notebook really what you're looking for?"

"It has to be." Jude affirmed with a nod, heading over to where Balan was working. "Professor Haus's notes could be the difference between completing our research in a year or ten years. It's very important!"

The notes were messy, and numerous, as expected of his mentor, but as he and Balan went over the contents, something wasn't quite right. With each new page, the notes became messier, as if written hastily or under duress. The further they went, the more things seemed less coherent and pieceier, confused. It took the both of them a moment to realize.

"Balan."

"Yes, I see it, too."

"But why?"

Concerned, Mary peered at the notes. "What's wrong?

Jude pulled the file from Balan's hands and began sifting through them more thoroughly. "There are pages missing. A lot of pages."

"Are they still in the crate?"

Jude shook his head, pointing to the spine, the scraps of paper still clinging to the metal coil. "Look here. The pages were ripped out…" His gaze rose to meet Balan, who appeared lost in thought. "Balan, is it possible that someone went through the crate before we got it?"

"The crate had the security tape still on it when it arrived. I imagine that they would have searched it before sending it up here."

 _That makes sense but… Security wouldn't have taken pages from the bottom of the pile, right?_ Jude fiddled with a stray strand of hair, evaluating their next steps. Having just a little research was better than none at all, but one had to wonder how useful those notes would be. They could try finding the extra pages, but…

A hand laid heavily on his shoulder. Alvin. "Jude, did Haus give you anything before he passed? Any papers or discs?"

He glanced to his bodyguard, shaking his head. "No, not a thing. I didn't think he was doing any work at home either… Usually he'd have me help if he was onto something…"

There was a collective sigh from the occupants of the room. Balan shook his head, one hand on his hip. "Well, at any rate, see what you can make if this, Jude. Perhaps we can fill the gaps with what we already know."

Jude gave a determined nod and crossed the room to his desk, setting the notebook down and getting to work. There was a lot of material, much of it that didn't make sense. _What was going on in Professor Haus's head when he was writing all of this? When did he write all this? Shouldn't he have called me or Balan if he had made a breakthrough?_

The more he thought about it, the more it didn't add up. Everything seemed so normal up until the night of the attack, what could possibly…

The night of the attack... What the professor had said… _He said he was going away for a while after the event…_

Realization dawned on him; the notes, the research… _What if the professor knew he was in danger? That his research had landed him in some sort of trouble and he was going to be a target?_ Jude flipped through the notebook again, noting the missing pages, the hurried, frantic scribbling.

 _What did you find, professor?_

"Jude." Balan's voice derailed his train of thought and Jude whirled around to face him. "You're the only one who was close enough to the professor to decipher his notes. It's imperative we find out the missing pieces sooner, rather than later."

"Right, sorry…" _I can't tell Balan about this,_ Jude thought. _If I do, then he could become a target, too…_

The stress must have shown on his face, because as soon as the apology left his lips, Alvin was on the defensive. "Give him a break, Balan." He scolded. "The kid has been working his ass off, even when he's at home."

A blush rose to his cheeks for the third time in less than an hour as Jude stared up at Alvin, honestly surprised that he was coming to his defense. It was… nice, to have someone stand up for him like that. Somehow having Alvin do it was even better.

Balan, however, didn't agree. He crossed his arms, the lights from the lab equipment shining off his glasses. "Jude, did I ever tell you about the time Alvin ate an entire bag of cheese crisps, and cried in the bathroom for two hours?"

Alvin recoiled. "W-what?! Balan, don't tell him about that!"

Balan completely ignored his cousin, instead turning his attention to Jude. "He thought he was going to die, so he wrote his last will and testament in crayon on the back of a magazine."

Jude quickly covered his mouth, trying his best not to laugh. "W-what? You can't be serious."

"Balan…" A warning from Alvin, one that went entirely ignored.

"He left all of his toys to the little girl down the street that he fancied, and demanded peach pie be served at his funeral. He was _five_."

"Spare me, _please_."

Jude couldn't hold it in anymore. He started laughing, harder than he had in a long time. It was the sort of contagious laugh that had the rest of the group holding their sides. At first, Jude felt bad for laughing so hard at Alvin's expense, but then he realized Alvin was chuckling along with him, his ears red from either embarrassment, rage, or both.

It was nice, Jude thought, laughing with everyone like this. It made it easier to forget the madness that had occurred just a day before.

When the guffaws died down, Jude wiped the beginnings of tears from his face, casting a brilliant smile to the group. "Thanks, guys. I really needed that." He looked up at Alvin, his smile suddenly apologetic. "You must have been a really cute kid, Alvin."

Alvin clapped him on the back with a grin. "Yeah, well. Remind me to tell you about the time Balan got stuck in a tree."

"Do not tell him about that," Balan warned.

Alvin just waved him off, dipping low so he could whisper in Jude's ear. "I have to make a call, wait here."

"Huh? Oh, okay." Jude watched him leave the lab, curious. But before he could dwell on it too long, Balan had pulled him into another discussion about their schedule and the new materials they had acquired. They had a lot of work to do.

* * *

"Dinner?" Jude echoed, bewildered.

The two had just left the base when Alvin popped the question. Casually, of course; it was rare that Alvin said anything without a joke in his voice or a sultry wink in Jude's direction. But this one seemed at least somewhat serious, if only for the fact that Alvin was avoiding his gaze.

"Yeah, dinner. There's a place in Duval I go to a lot. The food isn't the greatest, but it's quiet. I usually go there with my friends during off-time."

Jude didn't know what was more shocking; the fact that Alvin was asking him to dinner, or the fact that he wanted to take him to a place he frequented with friends. Did Alvin consider him a friend? Weren't they in a strictly working relationship?

He was blushing before he knew it, and Jude glued his eyes to the ground just to avoid showing his red face to Alvin. "What, is this a date?"

Alvin stifled a laugh. "I was thinking more of a 'Thank you for not letting me bleed to death in an alley' type of dinner." He pat Jude on the back, an odd offering of comfort.

Then, a pause, as if Alvin finally realized the stipulations of his offer."…Do you want it to be a date?"

Did he? Jude had to wonder. Alvin was kind, strong, attractive, and he put up with all of Jude's quirks that Leia always said would keep him single forever. Hell, even Leia liked him, which was rare; she was a great judge of character, or so she claimed. And it was true that he did enjoy Alvin's company, probably more than he should for someone that was being paid to stay with him.

Jude realized he knew very little about him, but… _going on a date with Alvin… That's part of getting to know someone you like, right?_ _But what if he just wants to be friendly? A friend date_? _It's just dinner._ He reminded himself. _And he was hired to keep an eye on me, so I shouldn't make it awkward, but…_ Jude swallowed thickly, his face burning up. He somehow couldn't manage the words. _What am I thinking? Do I seriously want this to be a date?_

Jude stopped dead in his tracks. _Oh, no… Do I… Do I actually like Alvin like that?_ Suddenly Jude was hyperaware of the heat in his face. He had known for a long time that he didn't care if the person he liked was a man or a woman, and the guys back in Fennmont always teased him for acting like a nervous git whenever he talked to the secretary at the hospital. He knew he liked her, but… _Alvin_. He didn't feel nervous around Alvin. Alvin made him feel safe, not just because he was his bodyguard, but just his presence, the way he carried himself. It felt like… Just being near him, things were going to be okay. Alvin didn't have to try to comfort him when he was scared, but he did. He didn't have to go out of his way to get Jude food or to carry him to bed when he was too exhausted to leave his desk. None of those things were required of a bodyguard, right? But Alvin did all that… _Does he like_ me _like that?_

Neither spoke, and Jude hoped he hadn't just made things difficult for Alvin. What would he do if he couldn't continue his work because Jude had made him uncomfortable? How would that look on his resignation to Bakur? _Sorry, can't keep this job, the kid has a crush on me._

The arm that was wrapped around his shoulders pulled him from his self-deprecating reverie, and Alvin was there, his face far too close for Jude to be comfortable with given his realization. "How about I take you on a date then?"

Jude didn't know his face could get any redder, but it somehow did. "Y-you're sure?"

And Alvin winked at him, erasing any insecurities he had on the matter. "Sure. This Friday, let's go on a date, Judy."

Jude glowered at the nickname. "Don't call me that."

It was going to be an interesting weekend.


	7. Chapter 7

Jude had been to Duval before.

At one point, Jude had considered living there, if only because it was easily the cheapest place to rent an apartment. But once Professor Haus had heard of this plan, he pushed for higher pay if only to keep him out of the slums. He was grateful after seeing it once; the dilapidated buildings stacked high and too close together spoke of the way people lived. The crime rate didn't help either; one of the highest in the area, even compared to Trigleph.

Alvin, on the other hand, didn't seem to mind the state of the town. "Duval's one of the best places to get work," he said, pointing out the job board littered with sheets of paper of varying colors. "If you don't mind getting your hands dirty with monster extermination, you can make a decent living."

"Monster extermination?" Jude knew the area had an unusually high population of feral creatures, but he hadn't pictured Alvin as the type to go out and fight them. "Isn't that dangerous?"

Alvin shrugged. "Of course, why else would people pay so much for it? So long as you don't die, you can make enough money to actually get out of Duval."He draped an arm around Jude's shoulder, tugging him close as a group of people pushed by them. "Speaking of, keep a hand on your wallet or _you'll_ be the one stuck in Duval."

Jude didn't know if he was blushing because Alvin was practically hugging him, or because he was spaced out enough to get pickpocketed. He put his wallet in his front pocket, just in case.

The two made their way through the winding streets towards a small tavern. Alvin had mentioned that it was a place he went to a lot with friends, and somehow it made sense that it'd be a bar instead of an actual restaurant. He just seemed the type. That _did_ make him wonder what his friends were like; were they all smooth-talking mercenaries like Alvin?

His question seemed to be answered once they arrived at _Film Noir_.

"Alvin, is that you?" A man dressed in typical Auj Oule garb approached them, a friendly grin upon his face.

"Yurgen!" Alvin seemed just as surprised, but pleasantly so. He pulled away from Jude long enough to give the stranger's hand a shake, returning the smile in kind. "What are the odds? Did you just get in?"

The man, Yurgen, shook his head briefly. "No, heading out actually. The proprietor of _Film Noir_ wants to start carrying Twilight Shochu, so we were finalizing the delivery schedule."

"Oh, so you'll be in town more often now," said Alvin, returning to Jude's side. "You'll have to swing by Trigleph and have a drink with me sometime."

"That's right, you took a job in Trigleph." Yurgen's gaze fell to Jude, who suddenly felt self-conscious. Just who was this guy?

Thankfully, Alvin filled the blanks for him. "Yep, this is Jude." He stated, tugging the boy close again. "He's the studious type, so I'm making sure he goes to bed on time." A grin, a wink, and Jude had to fight the urge to swat his bodyguard.

"A-Alvin!" Jude's face turned beet red. _Why did he have to put it that way?_

Yurgen seemed to take this in stride, offering a hand to Jude. "It's nice to meet you, Jude. Alvin's a good friend of mine."

Jude accepted it stiffly, his curious gaze rising to Yurgen's. "L… Likewise…"

A friend of Alvin's… He was definitely not what Jude expected. He had imagined a group of rough and tumble mercenaries that spent their wages on booze and women, not a humble Rieze Maxian merchant. For a while Jude watched them talk, marveling at how naturally it came to the two of them. It seemed like they hadn't seen each other in some time, yet they retained the closeness of their friendship even at a distance. It reminded Jude of himself and Leia, how they often would go weeks without seeing each other but could catch up in a matter of minutes like they'd never been apart.

Jude smiled at the thought.

Eventually, Alvin steered the conversation back to their outing. "Anyhow, we're about to get some grub. Are you heading back to Xian Du tonight?"

Yurgen nodded, picking up his satchel from the ground. "Yes, but I'll be back later this month with more goods." His eyes darted to Jude, before returning to Alvin's. "If you're available, I could use some help getting shipments delivered. It always goes faster with you around."

Alvin gave Jude's shoulder a squeeze, a silent reassurance. "I'll have to get back to you on that. Jude and I are going to be together for a while, so my schedule is booked."

"Fair enough. I'll keep in touch." He offered a bow to the two of them, slinging his pack over his shoulder. "It was nice seeing you, Alvin. Jude."

"Say hello to Isla for me." Alvin threw up a wave and watched as the man left, smiling fondly to himself. Before Jude could ask any questions, he was led into the bar.

 _Film Noir_ was only slightly bigger on the inside. One entire wall encompassed tightly packed shelves filled with bottles of varying sizes and shapes. The counter was before it, stretching across a majority of the bar itself, with small groups of tables and chairs pushed against the adjacent wall. A smooth jazz accompaniment played on the jukebox across the room, making Jude feel like he had just stepped into an old detective film. He supposed that was the purpose of the atmosphere; a feel to match the name.

The bartender barely acknowledged the two as they walked in, hitching a thumb in the direction of the corner table. Alvin tugged Jude along, pulling his chair out first, then his own. Chivalrous, Jude thought with a grin, and took his seat.

Remarkably, it was Jude who attempted conversation first. "So, you used to work for that guy? Yurgen?"

Alvin nodded, picking up the drink menu from its placeholder on the table. "I used to spend a lot of time in Xian Du, so we ran into each other a lot. When he decided to try his hand at the courier biz, he asked me to help out."

"You make it sound like you traveled a lot." Jude said, picking up his own menu. Most of it was finger food, it seemed, with only a handful of actual entrees among the appetizers. The rest of the menu was all alcohol, and Jude wondered if he was even allowed to be in there at all without being of age.

"I did, with my work. Wherever one job ended, I'd pick up a new one. You tend to bounce between areas a lot that way." Alvin waved over to a server waiting behind the counter, and she scuttled over with a notepad and paper. Alvin ordered scotch on the rocks, Jude ordered iced tea.

Jude was surprised; he figured that Alvin had moved around quite a bit, but he never stopped to consider just how much he had traveled. "Do you have a house somewhere? Or do you just go from job to job?"

"I have a few places to crash, but I guess my home base is in Trigleph. It's more for storage than anything." Alvin tucked the menu back into its placeholder and turned his attentions to Jude. "What about you? What part of Rieze Maxia are you from?"

"Oh." Had he never mentioned it before? "I'm from Leronde."

"No kidding?" The waitress brought over their drinks and Alvin thanked her briefly before turning his attentions back to Jude. "I had a few jobs take me there, but I've never seen you around."

Jude shrugged nonchalantly. "That's because I haven't been there in a while." He took a sip of his own drink; cool, bitter, with a hint of lemon. He thought about adding a packet of sugar, but didn't want to feel more like a kid in a place that was clearly meant for adults. "When I was ten I left for school in Fennmont, I haven't really gone back since."

"When you were _ten_? Do Rieze Maxians push kids into the workforce that quickly?"

Jude was quick to correct him, hands up in defense. "N-no, it's not like that. Most kids stay in primary until they're fifteen, and pick up their university courses after that. I was a special case." He didn't want to make it seem like he was bragging, but he was. Jude had mastered all the coursework before he reached the double digits in age, and was the pride of Leronde. The townspeople even pooled their money together so he could attend school in Fennmont and follow in his parents' footsteps. It wasn't his ideal outcome, especially since he had all but abandoned the medical field in favor of spyrix research. His father hadn't been happy.

"So that's how you managed to become a doctor already. I'm impressed." Alvin took a sip of his scotch, making a bit of a face before setting it aside. "Your parents must be proud."

Oh, that was a sore subject. "Not… really." Jude fiddled with a strand of hair, avoiding Alvin's gaze. "Honestly, when my dad found out I was moving to Trigleph to pursue a research career, he was furious. He still sends letters demanding I return home and help out at the clinic, use my degree towards something useful. Leia's family is more supportive."

"That's right, you said you and Leia grew up together." Alvin pulled the menu out again and began looking over the drink choices, scooting the scotch glass further away with one hand. Jude tried not to laugh.

"Yeah, Leia was originally in school to become a nurse so we could stick together, but when I moved to Trigleph, she decided to pursue journalism instead. She just got hired on with a local paper, actually." Jude tipped his glass to his lips, taking a long sip.

"Are you two dating?"

And Jude almost spat out his drink. He managed to gulp it back, coughing with his hand over his mouth. "N-no way! Leia and I… We've been like brother and sister for so long, we're just close!"

Alvin was trying not to laugh at his reaction, and in spite of his previous aversion to his drink, knocked it back anyway. "So that means I have a chance."

What? Had he heard him right?

Before he could query further, the door to the bar swung open again. Curious, Alvin leaned in his chair to see who had entered, and blinked in surprise. "Is that…?"

Jude turned around in his chair to see what had caught Alvin's attention. Two men, the first tall, pale, with white hair with accents of black on his bangs. The second stuck close behind him, his dark features a stark contrast to the other; black hair, crimson eyes. His stance was commanding, yet it would seem he was there on a personal matter, given the close proximity to his dining partner.

The first approached the barkeep and asked for a table, and as the waitress was setting it up, he spotted Alvin across the room and waved sheepishly. Alvin grinned in return, giving the pale man a thumbs up.

"Do you know them?" Jude asked, perplexed.

Alvin nodded, watching as the two others were seated at the opposite corner of the restaurant. "Yeah, old friends. Never expected that though." _That_ , likely referring to the fact that the men were clearly on a very private date.

But weren't they on a date as well?

Jude decided not to inquire about Alvin's friends, and instead buried his nose in the menu.

The waitress came to them soon after, taking their food orders. Alvin decided on a seasoned steak, and after a moment of deliberation, Jude decided on a pasta dish that was apparently the house special.

They fell into a silence after that, Jude anxiously stirring his tea, Alvin taking an abstract interest in the drink selection. It seemed that both were struggling for some sort of topic of conversation, or in Jude's case, any topic that wasn't the fact that he was on a date with his bodyguard. He had been doing so well up until the other men came into the bar, as if their presence reminded him that he too was having dinner with a very attractive older man.

"Hey, can I ask you something?"

The silence was broke by Alvin and Jude answered almost too quickly. "Sure, what is it?"

The waitress brought another drink, this one in a taller glass lacking ice. Beer, probably. Alvin took a swig before continuing. "The other day, you used spirit artes on me to close up that hole in my stomach…"

 _Oh, that…_ Why did Alvin have to bring up _that_ of all things? Jude nodded, taking another sip of his tea.

"What's it like? Being able to do…" Alvin made a vague gesture with his hand. "The Mana Lobe thing. What's it like having one?"

Oh.

"What do you mean? Like, the physical attributes?"

Jude finally met his gaze and Alvin was watching him, leaning his chin thoughtfully against his palm. "More like, does it feel different? All Rieze Maxians have them, right?"

That was a good question; Jude had lived his entire life with a mana lobe, as did everyone around him. Having one was just so normal that it was difficult to pin-point what was different about it, if there was anything at all. "It's hard to say," he admitted, playing with a strand of hair at his temple. "It's just a part of you, like your arm. I've never gone without it, so I can't really say what it's like to not have one."

"Yeah, well our arms can't talk to spirits," he offered with a grin, having another sip of his beer.

Jude had a little laugh at Alvin's quip, but he raised a valid point. Had there ever been a time that he had gone completely without?

He recalled a time when he had first arrived in Fennmont, when he was homesick and running on fumes from too many nights of endless studying and lack of proper food. He ended up falling ill and missing almost a week's worth of classes because he was too exhausted to move.

He remembered how quiet it was, how uncomfortable that silence made him.

"It's like… A hum."

Alvin quirked a brow. "A hum?"

Jude nodded, "Well, maybe not a hum, but… A chatter, like listening to people talking in the distance. There's a presence that you can't quite pinpoint, but it's not frightening like a stranger, but like… an old friend."

"And that chatter comes from the spirits?"

"I think so, yes. It's a sort of background noise that lets you know the spirits are there, that you're not alone and that you can call on them if you need help."

"Do you still hear them now that you're in Elympios?" Alvin asked, curious. "Spirits are scarce here, right?"

Again, Jude gave a nod, thinking back to when he first arrived. There were so few spirits in Trigleph that Jude felt he was walking into a ghost town, yet it was fully populated with living people. It was eerie, uncomfortable, and made channeling even more difficult. "It took me a couple of days to adjust to the quietness. The spirits that are here are eager to help, but almost have no energy to do so. They seem to like me well enough, though."

"That's because you give them mana, right?" Alvin supplied, and Jude grinned. He must have been reading the reports that were shipped from Professor Haus's estate. It was nice to know that Alvin was taking an interest in his work, even remotely. Jude always felt like he was boring him whenever he talked about his findings in the lab.

The waitress arrived with another glass of iced tea for Jude, and she paused to look the boy over, as if she wanted to ask something. Instead of addressing Jude, she leaned down to whisper something into Alvin's ear, casting an incredulous glance the boy's way. Alvin chuckled and whispered back, waving her off. Odd. Before Jude could ask, Alvin was speaking again.

"So… You exchange mana for power from the spirits. That's how you fixed me up, right?" He paused, taking a gulp of his beer. "What happens if you use it too much?"

"That…" He paused, wondering if there was a subtle way to put it, and quickly found that there wasn't. "Well… Mana is finite, and if the channeler runs low, there are side effects." Jude's gaze returned to his glass and he wrapped his hands the cool surface. The condensation wet his fingers, a calming sensation, grounding. "It's the same as if someone were to lack food or sleep. They quickly become dizzy and can even faint. It's not uncommon for first-year medical students to collapse from overexertion when they begin their artes training."

"So there's a limit?"

"Of course." Jude nodded at the curious man's inquiry. "Just like any activity, doing it too much can hurt you. As for me… When I lived in Fennmont, I used to fill in for Professor Haus at the clinic. Healing things like sprained ankles or cavities didn't take much, but serious injuries…" Jude's eyes ghosted to Alvin for a brief moment and the guard looked away, unwilling to meet his gaze. "It takes a lot more mana. I'd have to leave those to the more experienced doctors."

"What if you go past that limit?"

"Huh?"

Alvin locked eyes with him as he repeated himself. "What happens if you keep going after you're already fatigued from channeling?"

It was something Jude had never witnessed, nor did he ever wish to. He had read about it in his school books, the dangers of pushing your mana lobe too far, cases where surgeons on the battlefield fell into comas from repeatedly straining their Mana Lobes past the breaking point. Jude nearly shuddered at the thought.

"You could die." He said plainly, and it felt as if the weight of the conversation took a tangible form. It was clear why Alvin was asking all this; he felt guilty for getting hurt, even if it was an accident. He must have noticed Jude's symptoms after, how he felt tired, breathless, even though he did his best to hide it.

In the end, it was all out of concern for his charge, and so Jude attempted to inject a little positivity into the conversation. "I don't mind healing you, but try not to get so injured that I collapse in the process, all right, Alvin?"

Alvin nearly choked on his beer, and Jude had to stifle a laugh. The guilt was still there, but Alvin was at least smiling a little now. That alone made Jude feel better about his confession.

The waitress returned to their table with a platter of food and drinks. She set their meals before them and another beer for Alvin. He was on his third drink now. Was that why he was talking so openly? Jude had to wonder…

 _Well, they do call it liquid courage._

"Hey, Alvin?" He gestured to the pint. "What's the drinking age in Elympios?"

Alvin quirked a brow. "Twenty-one, why? What's the drinking age in Rieze Maxia?"

"It's sixteen if you're at home or with a guardian." He said, very matter of fact.

It seemed Alvin knew what he was getting at, and the brow only quirked higher. "Are you asking me to let you drink?"

Jude nodded firmly. "It's legal back home, and it's not like I haven't before, so…" He lied; Jude had never tried alcohol, always too busy with his studies to bother with the stuff. But Alvin didn't need to know that.

The mercenary deliberated a brief moment before passing the drink menu his way. "Well, looks like I'm your guardian tonight."

The expression on Jude's face was nothing short of a pout. "Don't say it like that. You sound like a dirty old man."

Alvin winked. Jude blushed, but he had already made his decision. He spent all of thirty seconds looking over the drink selection before calling the waitress over, ordering a strawberry daiquiri with a triumphant grin. She gave a worried glance to Alvin, then to the barkeep. Both shrugged and she sighed. No one was going to stop the underage drinking tonight. It was legal in his homeland, so no harm, right? Or at least, that's what Jude told himself.

The waitress set down the frothy red drink before him and Jude wasted no time in taking a sip. It was sweet, yet bitter, and the liquid burned his throat all the way down. He made a sour face before taking a bite of pasta, hoping to mask the taste with tomatoes and garlic.

"I thought you said you drank before?"

"Shut up."

The rest of their meal went without a hitch. As the amount of alcohol in Jude's glass lessened, so did his anxiety, until he was talking about anything and everything with Alvin over their meal. He spoke animatedly about his time in Trigleph, how he first met Balan and Mary, and how hard of a time he had making friends among his peers. He confessed how much he missed home, how Leia served as a reminder of Leronde, yet he loved having her around because she was always so supportive of everything he did. Alvin listened intently to all of it, asking questions here and there, seemingly content with hearing Jude talk.

It was about when Jude started talking about his attraction to both sexes that Alvin suggested that they head out, his alcohol-addled mind forgetting what filters were entirely.

Their meal was paid for and Alvin led Jude from the bar and into the neon-lit streets of Duval. It was late, Jude thought as he leaned heavily against Alvin. All the lights around him felt disorienting, made him dizzy, but he could only giggle to himself along the way.

"I thought you said you drank before," Alvin said, tugging Jude a bit closer as they walked to keep him upright. He didn't sound mad so much as worried.

Jude let a soft giggle, leaning heavily to the other side, forcing Alvin to follow to keep him from falling. "I lied."

"You brat!" Alvin reeled him back in with an exasperated sigh. "I can't take you on the train like this. They'll think me some sort of pervert."

Jude looked up at him like a deer in headlights. "Why would they think that?"

Alvin groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Let's just crash at the inn tonight. We'll head back to Trigleph tomorrow."

"No train?"

"No train."

Jude blinked, confused, but allowed Alvin to lead him down another street towards the inn.

The whole 'don't ask questions' mentality seemed to be commonplace in Duval. The lady at the counter barely spared Jude a passing glance as Alvin handed over the gald for a room, even when Jude nearly fell asleep standing up. If he was sober, he'd probably wonder why that was, and why a man taking a clearly intoxicated underage boy into a hotel wasn't raising any red flags.

But he was drunk, and such complex thinking was put on the backburner in favor of watching Alvin sign his name in neat handwriting he didn't expect the man to possess.

Their room was at the far corner of the inn, or at least Jude thought it was. It felt like they were walking forever, the hall shifting and twisting beneath his feet. How was Alvin standing so easily when the floor was moving? He voiced this, but it came out incoherent, garbled to his own ears. Alvin just squeezed his shoulders and moved a little faster.

One moment he was in the hall trying to decipher what kind of contraption could cause the entire hotel to move, and the next he was laying upon cool sheets, staring up at the amber lights over his head. Jude blinked owlishly, his mind fighting to catch up on the events of just a few minutes prior. And then Alvin was there standing over him, his face shadowed by the lights shining behind him.

He was pulled upright and supported by a strong arm, a glass pressed to his lips. "Drink this." He heard Alvin say, and Jude obeyed, swallowing, welcoming the pure water into his alcohol-laden system

Jude laid back onto the sheets, curling onto his side. He felt sleepy yet energetic at the same time, body and mind conflicting. He wanted to go out again, see more of Duval, but if the streets spun like the room was, he was certain he wouldn't get very far. Not that Alvin would let him try if he asked.

Alvin.

Jude's gaze fell to Alvin, who stood at the window a mere meter away, the neon lights shining onto him in the darkness. Jude laughed, and Alvin turned to face him.

"You brought a _boy_ to your room." Jude giggled, grinning coyly up at his bodyguard. He wasn't sure if it was his words or expression that made Alvin laugh, but he did, and suddenly Jude was laughing too.

Alvin came to sit at the edge of the bed, grinning at his charge. "Yeah, I guess I did."

Jude scooted closer until his knees were pressed against Alvin's back. The other man didn't budge. The room went quiet, Alvin watching the neon lights flicker and flash in elaborate patterns, Jude staring at the man's broad back in fascination. He felt the urge to sleep again, yet his mind jumped and wandered from topic to topic, refusing to give him peace.

Ultimately it was Alvin to bring his focus back.

"Hey… Why do you keep this up, anyhow?" Alvin asked, his gaze still firmly fixated out the window, as if he was afraid to look at Jude as he spoke. "All the studying and research… What's keeping you from jumping ship and going back home?"

That gave Jude pause. He hadn't given it much thought before. All this time, he had been solely focused on completing his work that he never considered what would happen if he just dropped it all and ran. Exodus would have preferred it that way, wouldn't they? And his parents for that matter…

His parents…

That was why…

"My mom… She's Rieze Maxian." Jude began, curling closer towards Alvin like a cat seeking warmth. "But my dad… I didn't find out til I was older, but he's Elympion."

"Your dad's Elympion?" Alvin sounded shocked at this fact. It was rare that an Elympion made it past the border before the treaty was in place, that much Jude knew, but he never stopped to question why or how his father had managed to get to Leronde.

Jude nodded, continuing his story. "Both of them are doctors. My mother uses Spirit Artes, and my dad has to use practical medicine like spyrixes. Both are effective, but neither are perfect… But they keep everyone in Leronde happy and healthy."

Alvin scooted closer to him, and Jude could plainly see the smile playing upon his face. It made Jude feel warm.

"My parents are proof that Rieze Maxians and Elympions can work together for the greater good…" He chuckled, his eyelids feeling heavier, the spinning slowly starting to cease. "When I found out about Professor Haus's research… I thought… I could do so much good with this. I could help people live happier lives and restore Elympios… I could make both worlds a better place."

He felt a warm hand ghost across his forehead, brushing the hair from his forehead. Alvin gently stroked his hair, smiling, eyes filled with… something Jude couldn't quite comprehend. Too tired, too drunk.

"Get some sleep, Jude," was the last thing he heard before drifting off, that warm hand lulling him into a deep slumber.


	8. Chapter 8

Jude couldn't remember the last time his head hurt this badly.

He awoke the next morning with what he quickly discerned as a hangover and only a vague recollection of what happened after his third daiquiri. Everything after had been a blur of lights and sounds, muffled by the fog of his alcohol-laden mind. Jude could vaguely recall the sensation of being half-carried half-dragged, the image of neon signs, and a shadowy figure leaning over him, speaking softly and touching his hair.

It was the makings of every PSA flyer Jude had seen since he was old enough to venture out on his own, and for a brief second he feared for his virtue. But when he awoke his clothing was intact and Alvin had already been to the breakfast buffet.

Too bad that the very idea of scrambled eggs and bacon was enough to turn his stomach and send Jude scuttling to the bathroom.

The trip back home didn't go much better. The overhead lights were far too bright for his liking and the clatter of wheels on the train tracks were enough to make his head spin. Looking back, Jude wondered what possessed him to order not one, but three of those drinks.

No, he knew _why_ , and looking back it had been a stupid reason to begin with. The only reprieve came from pressing his face into Alvin's shoulder, affectively blocking out the offending light.

"Was that your first time drinking?"

Alvin asked, a chuckle in his voice that was equal parts embarrassing and painful. Jude had lied about drinking before, and for that he ended up getting completely drunk on the "liquid courage" that was supposed to make talking with his date easier. Now he was paying for it with the hangover from Hell.

Jude grumbled something along the lines of "shut up" and "too loud", but it came out as an unintelligible whine. Alvin chuckled again, shifting so he could drape his arm around Jude's shoulder, allowing him to bury his face in his coat. Unlike the scent of food from earlier, the musky cologne Alvin wore was far less detrimental on his stomach.

The train slowed to a halt outside of Trigleph station and Jude was eased from his seat by Alvin. "C'mon, kid. We'll get you something for that headache when we get back."

"I'm not a kid, Alvin." But he allowed himself to be led by his guard, keeping his eyes closed as much as possible. Jude was grateful not to have class, but he did intend to get some work done. That wasn't going to happen if he couldn't read a page without going cross-eyed.

"What time is it?" Jude muttered in his haze, fumbling for his GHS in his pocket. He flipped it open, fully prepared for his overly sensitive eyes to be blinded by the LED, only to be met with a blank screen. "Oh, it's dead…" An astute observation.

"Forget to charge it?" Alvin shifted closer to him, removing his own GHS and flipping it open. "It's just before t-" He paused, pressing a few buttons, his expression growing dark.

"What is it?" Jude sat up and ventured a peek, trying to see what had caught Alvin's attention. Seventeen missed calls from Leia. That alone set alarm bells off; Leia preferred texting, reserving calls for emergency situations. One glance at the messages she had sent confirmed his fears.

 _alvin is jude with you?_

 _and hes not home!_

 _the police are EVERYWHERE where are you guys?!_

 _I AM FREAKING OUT ANSWER YOUR PHONE ALVIN!_

"Police? I told her where I was going!" Jude protested. He was young and he trusted Alvin, but years of date safety lectures from his mother taught him to always tell someone where he was going. That, and as soon as he let it slip that he was going to Duval with Alvin, Leia had demanded to know the details of his prospective night out.

It only took one ring for Leia to answer. " _Alvin! Where's Jude?!_ " Her voice was nearly deafening to Jude's sensitive hearing, but her panic remained clear none the less.

"Calm down, he's right here. We're on our way back to Trigleph right now."

" _Oh, thank goodness… I'm at his apartment now. You guys need to get back here!_ "

 _At my apartment?_ Jude grabbed for the phone, missing it entirely twice before Alvin just handed it to him. Jude pressed the speaker to his ear, bracing himself for assault against his sensitized hearing. "Leia, what's going on? What happened?"

" _Jude! Someone broke into your complex last night! I went to see if you were okay but your apartment door was kicked in!_ "

"What?!" Someone broke in? But that meant…

Jude took off, running ahead with Alvin's phone still clutched in his fist. He didn't care that the street was swirling around him still, making his stomach want to turn itself inside out. He didn't care that Alvin was following close behind, telling him to slow down, that he was going to hurt himself and that they needed to stay together while they were out. He just needed to get home, and fast.

Standing before the crumpled metal that was once his door, Jude looked into his ransacked apartment in horror. Shattered glass and sparking wires. Overturned shelves and a broken desk. Papers strewn around the room, some torn, some missing. His heart dropped out of his chest, heady bile rising into his throat. "No…" He took a wobbling step forward, eyes darting between the broken desk, the tipped shelves, the smashed computer monitor. His work, his research…

Jude dropped to his knees in the middle of the wreckage that was once his living room, trying to collect as many papers into his arms as possible. "This can't be… My work… All my work!" He cried, eyes darting around the room, what remained of months of his own research and years of his mentor's.

He just barely heard his name called from behind him. Alvin. Jude didn't wait for the man to speak again, didn't look his way, too absorbed in the cleanup.

"Don't just stand there!" Jude shouted, his voice cracking as he tried desperately not to cry. "All the progress, everything I've found…"

Alvin knelt beside him wordlessly, glancing around the vandalized apartment as if taking stock of the damage. Many other apartments had been kicked in too and a few had been looted, but none so badly as this one. It was easy to see why Leia had panicked so badly upon seeing the wreckage; the perpetrators were clearly out to do damage.

"Could they have been looking for something…?" Alvin observed, picking up a torn file, noting the numbered pages; none missing, but many torn.

"What could they have been looking for, Alvin?" Jude shouted, quickly losing the battle against his own emotions. He had spent hours, no, weeks, months of his time dedicated to his work not only for Spirius but for his own projects. He had done everything he could to progress quickly, so he could complete his task, all for the betterment of mankind as a whole. And what had it gotten him?

The first few tears slipped from his eyes not of sadness, but frustration, and Jude quickly wiped them away. No, he couldn't cry. Not in front of Alvin. Not again. "All I've wanted to do was to use my research to help Elympions, but every time I take a step, I get pushed back." His voice cracked as it rose in volume, his teary gaze aimed at his bodyguard, looking for answers. "Why does this keep happening, Alvin? Why… When I'm only trying to help!"

Alvin said nothing at first, only stood and carefully righted the bookshelf, looking anywhere but Jude in that moment. "People do things out of fear and hate, greed and power. Even if what you're doing is for the greater good, a lot of people can't look past their own agenda."

His words were telling, and immediately Jude knew what he was getting at. "You… You think Exodus did this, don't you?" It all made sense. The same people who had killed Professor Haus, attacked those people in the square… This thought only managed to compound the anger and sorrow he felt. "I… I can't figure it out. Why would they want the professor dead? Why… When we were both working so hard to make their lives better?"

Jude stood and surveyed the room again, thousands of pages filled with diagrams and research findings scattered about. His grip on the paltry stack of notes tightening, eyes falling to the sea of white at his feet; it would take days to organize them all again, and that was if there was nothing missing. "Wasn't it the Elympion government that brought us here? Didn't they want our help? Then why…" His voice rose with every word, Jude quickly losing his grip on his emotions. "Why do they continue to torment us? Why squander all our findings over some stupid grudge?!"

The papers were thrown down as the dam finally broke, and Jude cried, the frustration, fear, and anger all too much to hold in any longer. It wasn't fair. None of it was fair. Why? Why continue if all he'd meet were roadblocks set by those he wanted to help? Never before had he felt the urge to give up so strongly. He had always told himself to keep going, that things would get better, but every time he felt things were looking up, something horrible would happen and send him straight to the bottom again. It was such a feeling of hopelessness that Jude didn't know what to do with himself; he could only stand in the middle of his destroyed apartment, wrap his arms around himself and cry.

 _Maybe this is what they wanted… To break me, to make me feel like this wasn't worth pursuing at all._ The logic only served to make him cry harder as he realized their tactics were _working_ and it was all he could to keep himself upright while reality crumbled around him.

And then, Alvin's arms were around him, pulling him into a warm embrace. Alvin. Alvin was there. But his comfort only served to make Jude feel more weak, vulnerable, as the visage of the mature doctor melted away to that of a trembling sobbing child. "I don't understand…" He muttered, burying his face into Alvin's shirt. "What have I done to deserve all this, Alvin?"

Alvin just shook his head, running his fingers through Jude's hair. There was nothing he could say to make this better. Not now, not with months of research scattered at their feet and Jude barely clinging to his resolve.

In the back of his mind Jude registered Alvin's phone buzzing, yet he remained, holding him close.

They agreed that staying at the apartment wasn't in Jude's best interest. The door needed to be repaired, and the police needed to investigate the scene for any clues as to who exactly was behind the crime. It was a fruitless effort; Jude was already certain _who_ had torn his place apart, and the fact that they were virtually untouchable only made things worse for him.

Leia had volunteered her apartment first; it was small, but centrally located, and the familiar face would certainly make him feel better. But Jude couldn't find it in himself to accept her offer. Leia meant well, but with all that had happened recently, Jude knew staying with her would only put her in danger. That, and Alvin would have to stay in the apartment as well, and Leia's place was hardly equipped for one person, let alone three.

The option of going home was suggested again, and Jude immediately shot it down. Running home and giving up… As much as he wanted to, Jude couldn't bring himself to abandon all the progress he had made. It was what Exodus's wanted, and Jude wasn't about to give them the satisfaction of breaking him down.

Even if they were already succeeding.

In the end, Jude had packed up his clothing and what books he could fit in a duffel bag and went to Alvin's apartment.

It was larger than he expected, but sparsely decorated. The living room had a couch and a television, the bedrooms furnished with beds and dressers both. It reminded Jude of the dormitories he stayed in while living in Fennmont, before he had moved all his belongings in. Alvin had reiterated on the way over that he hadn't actively lived there in a long time, mostly because his work took him to far off destinations on the regular. But it was quiet, safe, and most importantly, gated. Jude wondered if his apartment would have been vandalized if he had lived in a place like this, with surveilled entries and security guards.

Almost immediately Jude threw himself back into his work. Over the course of a few days, the collection of books and materials piled up in the spare bedroom of Alvin's apartment. Files from the lab, what books he could bring over in boxes with Alvin's help, stacks of notes from Haus's research and his own, anything that could help speed up his progress. They all ended up in his borrowed bedroom, scattered about in an order that only made sense to Jude.

Haus's notes did bear some fruit; his research had discovered a new correlation between spirit fossils and spyrix technology. The research was vague, harried, but it was _something_ and Jude wasn't about to let any potential leads go to waste.

He hardly slept, keeping himself up with coffee pilfered from Alvin's kitchen and sheer will-power. Empty dishes and containers piled up next to the door for Alvin to retrieve while Jude remained hunched over his desk, filtering through note after note of loosely related material. Each passing hour yielded more leads, more studies to look into, a never ending trail of research and theories.

But they weren't more than just that, theories. Things they had covered before weeks ago and had lead nowhere. But Jude didn't want to let anything go to chance. Had they missed something before? Could a lead have gone elsewhere? He had to know.

Jude was going down a bad path, and he knew this, yet he couldn't bring himself to slow down, let alone stop.

By day three, Alvin had enough.

"Jude, give it a rest." Alvin was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. "You're gonna burn out at this rate." He was concerned, and why wouldn't he be? Jude had hardly left his room save for rummaging for snacks in the fridge, and even that was a rarity now. But he couldn't stop, not when he was making so much headway with his research.

Jude waved him off, not even looking up from his notes. "I'm onto something here, I'll sleep later."

"You said that this morning." Alvin came to lean on the back of Jude's chair, forcing Jude backwards, away from his notes. "What good is your research going to do if you're laid-up in bed from exhaustion?"

Jude gave a tired pout before swatting Alvin away, annoyed. "I have to do _something_ , Alvin. If I can just complete my research and present my findings to Spirius, then maybe…"

"You think it's going to stop." Alvin finished for him, staring him down. "You think if you crack down and turn in your findings, Exodus will leave you alone."

Jude refused to look his way. He knew he was right. Fear, frustration, self-doubt… He couldn't run back home without finishing his job, but continuing for the sake of his own moral code was becoming harder with each day. If he could just turn in his work, appease his employers, then maybe he could live peacefully.

His silence was all the answer Alvin needed.

Without warning Alvin lifted him bodily from the chair, provoking a yelp of protest from Jude. "A-Alvin! Put me down!" He shouted, flailing his arms and legs in an effort to get away from his guard. "I said, _put me down_!"

Alvin refused, carefully stepping over the piles of books and discarded papers that had overtaken the floor of his spare bedroom. Jude continued to squirm, pushing, swatting at Alvin, screaming and demanding to be let down so he could go back to his work. None of which had any effect, save for Alvin looking increasingly fed up with his tantrum.

Jude's fist connected with Alvin's nose with a spectacular crack. Alvin shout a string of curses in Old Elympion, just barely dodging a pile of books as he stumbled the rest of the way to the bed. He tossed Jude unceremoniously on the mattress, bracing both hands on either side of his head, effectively pinning him down.

"Look, I've been lenient with your crazy, self-destructive tendencies, but I'm drawing the line." Alvin all but spat, a trickle of blood dripping from his nose. Furious was an understatement. "I don't give a damn if you're on a roll, you're going to end up sick in the hospital if you don't take care of yourself! And who the hell taught you how to punch like that, huh? Are you _trying_ to break my nose?!"

It was probably the first time Alvin had yelled at him, and Jude was at a complete loss on how to counter. He was right, damn it, he was always right. All at once Jude realized how much of a fool he had been; going over the same notes over and over, retracing all his research and meeting the same dead ends… He was only placating himself with the illusion of progress if only to prove that he was still together, that he could still complete his job. But at this rate, he'd end up too far gone to recover.

And Alvin was only looking out for him, but instead of thanking him for being so supportive, Jude had hit him instead.

"I…" Jude tried to mutter an apology, but stopped short, realizing just what sort of position they were in. His mind drifted back to their date, the soft utterance of Alvin having a chance with him that he thought Jude didn't hear. He'd attribute the blush that crept across his cheeks to exhaustion, hormones, curiosity, _anything_ other than the fact that Alvin had him pinned to the bed and was glaring at him with such ferocity that his heart skipped a beat.

It was as if Alvin realized this as well, and only then did he back away, crossing the room to turn off the lamp and close the blinds. "Take a nap." He muttered, hand over his face to stem the flow of blood. Alvin quickly exited the room and shut the door behind him, leaving Jude to his thoughts.

The passage of time gave the impression of sleep, yet Jude felt he'd only laid in silence for several hours instead of actually resting. He'd close his eyes for a moment, only for his tumultuous thoughts to bring him back to waking in what felt like moments. It wasn't until the sun had set that Jude finally pulled himself from his borrowed bed, spurred by his hunger and the desire to see his friend.

 _I need to apologize, at least._ Jude thought, sitting up slowly. A quick glance at the clock denoted the late hour, and Jude felt a small wave of relief when he realized he had slept at least a little.

Peeking out into the living area, Jude could see the flicker of lights from the television set illuminating the room. On the couch lay Alvin, remote in one hand, tissues stuffed up both nostrils. Jude had to stifle a laugh at that; he really did a number on him.

Jude came to sit on the floor before the couch, his eyes drifting from Alvin's pensive sleeping face, the bruises that had formed around his nose. Alvin always woke up before Jude, and waited for him to fall asleep before bedding down himself. During his craze, had Alvin slept just as little as he had? How many times had he walked in to check on him, only for Jude to ignore him in favor of his futile efforts?

 _Alvin… He really does care, doesn't he?_

He pressed his hand gently to Alvin's face, drawing mana from the few spirits around him to heal the damage he had caused. Alvin winced, eyelids fluttering as he came back into conscious to a glow of blue and a wave of relief. Their eyes met, and Jude smiled.

"Sonya." Jude said, a soft chuckle in his voice. "Leia's mother. She's a martial arts master. She taught both of us how to fight to defend ourselves."

Alvin blinked, then grinned. "Remind me to never piss her off." He sat up, plucking the tissues from his nose and tossing them onto the coffee table to be taken care of later. His gaze returned to Jude, and he pat the cushion next to him. "Did you sleep?"

Jude came to sit next to him, sinking into the plush warmth. "I think I did… I _hope_ I did…" He sighed, letting his eyes slip closed. "I'm… I'm sorry for hitting you. You were only trying to help and…"

"I get it." Alvin cut him off, and Jude turned to look at him, surprised. "You're doing what you can to keep going, Jude. But you can't keep at this pace, you know?"

"Yeah…" Jude sighed, rubbing at his sore eyes. He really was tired. "Thanks, Alvin."

"Don't mention it, kid. Just try not to hit my face next time. If you ruin my dashingly good looks, what will I do when this job is done?"

Jude snort, rolling his eyes. "Right, there goes your dream of being a trophy husband."

"I'd remain a lonely bachelor with too many cats for the rest of my days. What will my mother think?" That earned Alvin a swat to the head, and they both laughed for the first time in days.

As the laughter died off Alvin wrapped an arm around Jude's shoulder, pulling him closer, making him feel safe, warm. "Get some sleep, kid." He said quietly, his hand coming up to idly play with Jude's hair.

Jude gave a slight nod, allowing his eyes to slip closed once again.


	9. Chapter 9

Jude was eternally grateful for the silence of Helioborg at night. How the security team ever allowed him to stay so late, he'd never know. It was probably Bakur's doing, or some unspoken rule that allowed obsessed researchers to stay locked down in base after hours to continue their work.

It was nice, Jude thought, to be able to continue without any interruptions in the dead of night when his brain seemed to be the most productive. Even Alvin hadn't nagged him about it, so long as he went to sleep at some point. They had reached a bit of an understanding after their last spat about his sleeping habits, and for that he was grateful. Alvin really was only trying to help.

 _Alvin_.

Jude leaned back in his chair and sought Alvin in the dim-lighting. He was exactly where he left him three hours ago: on the couch, GHS in hand, nodding in and out of sleep while texting. The scene brought a smile to Jude's face; when he didn't sleep, Alvin didn't either just so he could keep an eye on him. Another rule of being a bodyguard, he supposed, but it was appreciated. Sometimes Helioborg got to be a little creepy at night, and having someone else around to keep him company made things easier.

"Alvin, if you want to take a nap, I'll wake you." Jude offered to the tired man.

Alvin paused in his half-asleep texting to look his way, blinking rapidly before grinning. "Shouldn't I be the one saying that? You're going on twenty hours, aren't you?" And he was right, but once again, Jude was on a roll and didn't want to leave before finishing his current task.

Jude pushed back from his desk and stood, stretching with arms high above his head. "I know. I'm almost done scanning and cataloguing the files we got from Professor Haus's lab so we can find them easier." He walked over to the worktable and began shuffling through the mountain of paperwork Mary and he had sorted into piles based off their dates in hopes of making the process easier. So far it was still a mess, but they were making progress.

Alvin stood as well, arching his back with an audible pop from his spine. "How much longer do you think?"

"Four, maybe five hours."

"Jude." A tone of warning; he knew what was coming.

"I know, I know. I just don't want to leave it all for Mary to do, okay?" Jude sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. It was a battle he knew he couldn't win, and it was for the best that he conceded this one. He _was_ tired after all.

Alvin shook his head with a hefty sigh of his own. "I'll give you two more hours, but after that you're sleeping for at least five, you got that?"

"Three and four." Jude countered.

" _One_ and _six_." Alvin wasn't budging.

The battle was lost. Jude bowed his head. "Fine, two hours, then I'll sleep. But wake me, okay? I want to keep working on this."

Seemingly satisfied with their compromise, Alvin gave him a tired smile. "Deal. But if we're going another two hours, I need some coffee. Do you want any?"

"Please." The smile was returned in full. At least Alvin was trying to work with him on the whole sleep schedule nonsense.

Alvin pocketed his GHS and headed for the door, pausing at the entry to glance back at his charge. "Don't leave this room until I get back."

"I know, I know." It was the same warning as always, but a necessary one. Jude felt a little safer being left alone in the lab alone since the gates were locked and guards posted on the parameter, but the paranoia remained. Alvin never tried to disprove it, either, which was both comforting and not. Jude was never safe alone, but he was safe with _Alvin_ , or at least it felt that way.

Perhaps he was becoming too dependent on the man. Alvin was, and remained, his hired bodyguard. Eventually, his contract would end and Jude would be left to fend for himself. When that would happen, he was unsure. It could be when his project was done or when Exodus was gone, or even when Bakur decided he was no longer needed. What would he do when he no longer had Alvin to watch his back? To make sure he ate and slept properly and kept him company in the lab on late nights?

But Alvin wasn't just his bodyguard now… Right?

Since their tiff at Alvin's apartment, things began to feel different. Not in a bad way, far from it. They just seemed closer somehow. Alvin would often come to check on him while he worked, his hands lingering on his shoulders long after their brief conversations had ended, as if he had more to say but did not know how to bring it up.

When they were alone it was much the same, prolonged touches, longing gazes aimed his way when Alvin thought Jude wouldn't notice. But he was, and what Alvin didn't know was that they were being returned, shyly, by Jude himself.

There was something there, but it felt like Alvin was unwilling to act. It was frustrating for Jude, but he could hardly blame him either. Even he was unsure where to start, or if he even should. Their relationship was a professional one, and he could call him a friend at best. And yet more than once he had caught himself staring, his heart hammering in his chest at the mere thought of having the man closer.

Leia had noticed it too.

In fact, they had met up with her earlier in the day, an impromptu lunch date between friends. With his schedule being so packed (by his own doing, he'd admit) they hardly had time to see each other. Leia demanded lunch for being ignored so long, saying it was unacceptable for Alvin to talk to her more than he did.

Jude had to agree, but that did leave him to wonder what the two were chatting about constantly. He even made Alvin wait at the entrance, for safety, and so he could talk privately with his best friend.

"Are you doing okay, Jude?" She asked as soon as they were seated, the menus placed before them before the waitress scurried off to help another patron at the busy diner. "We haven't talked much since the break-in."

He may not always show it, but Jude was eternally grateful for her concern. When they were kids, he often shrugged it off as her being nosy, meddling. He was a boy and he should be able to take care of himself, that's what his father would say. But Leia had never tried to change him. She'd say that Jude didn't need to avoid things like cooking or reading just so the others would like him better, just like she wouldn't avoid training with her mother just to seem more like a girl. The unequivocal acceptance made Jude feel better, even when his own father would often belittle him for not living up to expectations.

As they grew older, Jude continued to appreciate the eternal ray of sunshine that was his best friend. Even when things were rough for her, she always offered all the support that Jude could ever ask for, even when she herself needed it more. Selfless was a good way to describe Leia, to the point that it hindered her own progress in life.

When they moved to Trigleph, they vowed to do their best, and in spite of all the insane things that had happened, Leia had already held up her end of the deal. She had made friends, got her own place, and truly grown independent.

Jude envied that of her. She had managed to keep things going for herself while Jude remained stagnant. He had to wonder if he'd always be this way, too afraid to move without someone pushing him.

But at least the people who pushed him remained, always willing to pick him up off the ground when he fell. Leia, Balan, Mary… Even Alvin. He didn't know where he'd be without them.

Well, he knew _where_ , but he didn't want to think about that just then.

"Things are going better." Jude said with a small smile. "I feel like I'm making progress again at the lab, even if it's slower than normal."

Leia shook her head, crossing her arms over her chest. "No, I mean you _personally_. You've gone through a lot in just a couple of months, and…" She deflated slightly. "And I'm worried. I know how you get when you're stressed."

All too well, Jude reminded himself. Even when he was a kid he had a tendency to push himself past his limit, to the point that he'd end up sick from exhaustion. Even more recently, when his board exams were upon him and he had procrastinated to the point of cramming for four days straight, Leia was the one he called when he felt too tired to crawl from his desk to his bed. It was a wonder she didn't hop the first boat to Fennmont back then, but she did stay on the phone with Jude until he had gotten into bed and demanded he sleep until he was fully rested.

But this time… It wasn't Leia that dragged him to bed, but Alvin.

Jude grinned sheepishly, idly playing with a strand of hair. "Ah… I did go a little overboard right after, but Alvin's been keeping me in line. He makes sure I don't go too long without food or sleep."

"I'm glad for it! You need a good kick in the right direction sometimes. You end up stuck otherwise."

She had him pinned, Jude had to admit. Leia wasn't his best friend for nothing.

The waitress delivered their drinks, and Jude wondered if he should bring Alvin over so he could participate in the meal. It was only fair, but the next words out of Leia's mouth reminded him as to why he was left at the door.

"Speaking of, just what is up with you and Alvin?"

Jude almost choked on his tea. He really shouldn't try drinking when someone is talking to him.

"W-what do you mean?" Jude coughed and he was sure Alvin was staring at him from across the room.

"Oh, don't play dumb, Jude. You guys went on a date, right? I never got the details out of you from that."

Right, he had promised details. Jude felt his face grow hot with embarrassment. He couldn't tell her that he had gotten piss-drunk in Duval and didn't remember half the night; Leia would never let him live it down. But lying was just as bad.

Better to just come clean about it.

Jude idly stirred his drink, unable to meet her incredulous gaze. "I… Well it was nice, and Alvin is…" He never imagined putting it into words would be so difficult. "Alvin is very kind, and considerate, and supportive… And I… Well…"

"You have a thing for him." Leia added, grinning slyly.

And Jude was wholly unable to disagree. "Yeah… I think I do, but…"

"But you think he doesn't have a thing for you."

Leia was a mind reader, he was sure of it. That, or Jude was horribly obvious.

The drink was set down and Jude gave a heavy sigh. "He's my bodyguard. He's paid to be around me at all times. Dating me isn't in his job description." Jude continued to tell himself that, and yet it always left him feeling just a little more depressed than before.

Of course, Leia had a quip for that mindset as well.

"Have you asked him about it?"

"Why would I do _that_? It'd only make things awkward!"

"Jude, _you're_ awkward." She wasn't wrong. "What if he has a thing for you too? Have you noticed any signs?"

"Signs?" What did she mean _signs_? Knowing himself, the only sign he'd readily notice would have been a neon banner over Alvin's head saying "I like you".

But… Thinking back, hadn't there been hints that Alvin might be interested? The lingering touches, the longing looks, the way he paused during conversations as if he wanted to say something but couldn't find the words. Fixing him meals, checking on him throughout the day, inviting him to watch his favorite TV programs with Alvin's arm around his shoulder just so Jude would do something other than work and study, and carrying him to his room when he inevitably fell asleep.

Protecting him, holding him when things got to be too much, not shaming him for crying, telling him things would be okay, that he was safe, that he'd protect him.

Were those things really in the job description of a bodyguard?

And then there was Duval, their "date", the words muttered into Alvin's glass when he thought Jude couldn't hear them. _"Maybe I have a chance."_

His face was lit a brilliant red.

Leia grinned smugly, as if she just witnessed the pieces coming together first hand with her help. "You should talk to him about it sometime. Who knows how much longer you two will be working together. You don't want to miss your chance!"

"You're right, but… How do I even ask Alvin about it?"

"Ask me about what, Jude?"

Jude almost ejected from his chair when he heard the older man's voice. Whirling around his eyes lay upon Alvin, who could only grin and offer him a nonchalant wave. "Hey, didn't your mom tell you it's impolite to talk about someone behind their back?" He winked playfully and Jude's face turned a spectacular shade of pink. Just how much had he heard?

Thankfully, Leia was there to bail him out.

"Alvin, come sit with us! We're about to order our food!" She patted the seat between herself and Jude, which Alvin took graciously.

The conversation seemed to recover from there, Leia leading the topic away from Jude's obvious crush on his bodyguard and more towards safe waters. Her work, the latest fashion, what they intended to do that weekend. Once again Jude was grateful to have her around; Maxwell knew he'd never survive in social situations without her.

The flutter of papers and folders broke him from his reverie, one of the files having toppled over onto the lab floor. Jude muttered a soft curse before kneeling to pick them up, hoping they hadn't gotten mixed together. It was one of the newer stacks, one filled with handwritten documents and incoherent diagrams left by his late mentor.

His eyes fell to one page in particular. A white sheet of paper with row after row of black boxes, arranged in no particular fashion, creating a strange design that covered the entire page. It was printed, that much Jude knew, but its purpose was completely foreign to him. _But if it is part of the files that Professor Haus kept, then it must have some sort of importance._

Jude carried the pile to the scanner and began feeding pages through, watching as they came up on the monitor one after another. One of the many benefits of Elympion technology; items could be transcribed into searchable indexes within minutes, making the search for materials in the lab much quicker than digging through endless piles of paper. That, and there was a shortage of trees in Elympios, so any technology that could be used instead of traditional pen on paper was greatly desired.

One after another, the pages appeared on the screen, a dialogue box transcribing them and saving into a file. The words would appear in a separate file, leaving the scanned image attached just in case there was a mistake in transcription. With how messy Haus's notes could get, having the originals intact was essential.

The computer suddenly played a horrid buzzing through the tinny speakers, several beeps following immediately after. It was enough to startle Jude into dropping the remaining files as several dialogue boxes appeared on the computer screen in rapid succession. Jude stood at the keyboard, trying to get the computer to respond, only for it to continue flickering through pages and displays until finally going black.

"Oh, great." Jude grumbled. "I broke it."

Jude glanced to the scanner, noting the most recent page to be sent through; the bizarre, black squared paper. _It must have freaked the software out,_ Jude mused with a sigh. He reached behind the tower to turn off the system, only to pause as another beep echoed through the empty lab. A new dialogue box appeared against the blank screen.

 _REQUIRES PASSWORD__

"Password…?" Jude's eyes drifted from the screen to the scanner. The last page to filter through was the one covered in strange boxes. Did that have something to do with it?

Curious, Jude sat down before the keyboard, wondering what password the machine was prompting for. Judging by the file name, it must have been something to do with Haus, or else created by the man himself.

Jude tried to think back to the passwords that Professor Haus used often, coming up with only a handful. The man wasn't entirely fond of the computers he was given to use, and often called on Jude to help with the work.

The only thing he could do was try.

He tried the most common one; _HOWE1_

 _INVALID PASSWORD__

Jude frowned, making another attempt. _MAXWELL_

 _INVALID PASSWORD__

Still nothing. Another. _EGGPRINCIPLE_

 _INVALID PASSWORD__

"Damn it!" Jude growled, frustrated. Why did Professor Haus wait until he got to _this_ file to get creative with his passwords? He leaned back in the chair, scrubbing his hands across his face. _Password, password… What was the password…_ Jude racked his brain for any sort of clue, any idea of what his mentor would have used to lock this particular file.

He leaned over the keyboard again, typing in another shot at the required word.

 _SPIRITARTES_

 _INVALID PASSWORD__

 _RASHUGAL_

 _INVALID PASSWORD__

 _FENNMONT_

 _INVALID PASSWORD__

Nothing. None of the obvious passwords were working. Jude stared at the screen, as if waiting for the answer to pop out at him. What would be easy for Haus to remember, but difficult for anyone else to guess?

An idea occurred to him, one that felt conceited, and yet it might be simple enough to work.

Carefully he typed the new attempt, hoping for the best.

 _JUDEMATHIS_

 _PASSWORD ACCEPTED__

The screen flickered to black again before a dozen new windows appeared, filled with documents and scanned notes. They didn't appear to be anything of Haus's, why would they be in the archive?

The foremost article caught his eye, the bold print reading "Otherworld Reactor Plan", the date from ten years back. Jude began scanning over the lines, trying to ascertain the purpose of the document

He immediately wished he hadn't.

' _We the citizens of Elympios recognize that our continued survival as a civilization depends on the energy harnessed from spirits. With the recently acknowledged shortage of spirits, we recognize that we must harness more mana from other means in order to assure the livelihood of our country. We of Exodus…_ Exodus, Jude paused at the name, his heart skipping a beat. _…propose the reinstatement of the Otherworld Reactor Plan in order to harness the spirits residing in other lands.'_

The spirits in other lands… It didn't take a genius to figure out which land the document was referring to. While that alone instilled a sense of panic in the pit of his stomach, Jude forced himself to continue.

' _The recently proposed mana-siphoning device, EX-02-A (informally known as the Lance of Kresnik, see article 193) would allow the necessary mana to be drawn from sources outside of Elympios in order to power the technology needed to sustain our way of life.'_

Jude clicked over to the aforementioned article, a diagram showing a strange looking canon. The Lance of Kresnik, Jude realized. Large red print at the top stating, quite plainly, that the information was confidential and not for public release. His eyes glanced between the diagrams and the article as it went into more detail of the cannon's mechanisms. How it was powered, how the energy was to be stored. From what he could gather, it seemed the plan had been deemed a failure due to the team's inability to properly power the equipment. The spyrix just couldn't handle it without melting down and the article cited several accidents that resulted in loss of life.

In the end, the plan was dropped completely. _'Any further development of EX-02-A was formally ceased as of 10/02/2279. Any and all documents pertaining to EX-02-A are to be taken out of circulation.'_

And yet, these documents remained. Exodus, the Otherworld Reactor Plan, the Lance of Kresnik… Jude realized that these were the plans set in motion long before Haus and he were brought into the picture. But why did Professor Haus have all these? Where did they come from?

There must have been a reason, Jude thought.

Jude plucked the sheet of paper from the scanner. Whatever it was, it must have been what brought up the archive, with the file itself being on the hard drive hidden away. _I better get these together to show Balan. It looks like these were circulated publically at one point. Maybe he'll know why Haus had them saved?_

He clicked the file menu, selecting the export option. It was better to have these on a disc than buried in the hard drive and only accessible with a coded sheet. The dialogue prompted for a disc, and Jude grabbed on from the pile atop the tower and inserted it into the slot. The countdown began, 1%... 2%... It wouldn't take too long.

While he waited, Jude continued to browse through the documents. More schematics, the proposals from Exodus, and rejections from the Elympion government. All of them seemed to prolong the inevitable instead of solving the problem. He moused over to another article, and the color drained from his face as he took in the words. It appeared to be an internal memo of sorts, circulated via electronic mail. And the crowd it was addressing only served to make Jude feel ill.

 _'With the opening of the border, we of Exodus feel we can no longer stand aside and watch our own kind live in squalor in order to appease the government of Rieze Maxia. As we have established private support and have invited outside researchers for the task of resolving issues that previous halted our progress, I, Gilandor Yul Svent, formally reinstate the Otherworld Reactor Plan under privatized development.'_

That name.

Gilandor Yul Svent.

Svent.

 _Svent._

 _Alvin Svent._

Before Jude had even a second to process this thought, he heard a distinctive metallic click. He froze, breath hitching in his throat, before slowly turning around. He found himself staring down the barrel of a gun. Alvin's gun.

"Alvin, what is this…?" Jude's voice was small, frightened, looking to the man for answers.

The pistol remained pointed at his head, Alvin's finger on the trigger, his expression flat, emotionless. "Just give me the disc, Jude, and I'll forget I saw anything."

"Alvin, what's happening?" Jude asked, taking a step back, trying to put some distance between himself and the gun aimed his way. "What are all these documents? Does Exodus… Do they have something to do with Haus? Is that why…?"

"Stop talking, Jude." Alvin demanded, voice stern, angry. This wasn't the Alvin he knew. "This is not for you to know."

Jude braved a glance at the monitor, noting the export dialogue in the corner. 95%... 96%... "Alvin… Please tell me you're not part of Exodus." He needed answers, but he also needed to stall. Just a minute more, and then he could take the disc and run. "Please tell me you're not working with these murderers!"

A shot rang out, ricocheting off the metal casing of the computer just inches from his head. Jude stifled a scream, eyes locking with the man he had trusted to protect him, now the one after his life. "Alvin, what are you doing?!" He shouted, hand inching towards the eject button. Just a couple more seconds...

"I don't want to do this, Jude, but you leave me no choice." Alvin pulled the hammer back again, another bullet entering the chamber, ready to fire again.

Jude knew he had to do something, anything, to save himself, and something told him just complying with Alvin's order wasn't going to spare him Exodus's wrath. And Alvin… Alvin wasn't going to protect him this time.

The electronic beep from behind him was his cue. Jude shot forward, using one arm to knock Alvin's gun away, the other to connect fully with the man's jaw. While the man was staggered Jude grabbed the disc and made a break for the door, running as fast as his legs would carry him. He could hear Alvin shouting for him to stop, the sound of footsteps close behind, but Jude kept running, taking every corner he could just to keep himself out of the line of sight.

Jude took the steps two at a time, trying put as much distance as possible between him and his assailant. He stopped at the ground floor, pushing against the main entry door, only to find it locked. Jude cursed under his breath, quickly looking for the emergency signs. If he ran out one of those doors, the alarms would go off and the guards would come. That may be just what he needed.

Before he could take another step, another shot hit the door near his face, causing him to jump back. "Stop running, Jude!" Alvin shouted from the stairwell. How had he caught up so fast?! "You're only making this harder on yourself!"

Why?

Why was this happening?

Jude took off again, bolting for the nearest exit, praying it lead to freedom. But Alvin was always right behind, through every twist and turn, even as Jude began to lose his breath, his steps becoming haggard, labored. _Just a bit further, just a little more…!_

Alvin caught him around the shoulders as soon as his hands hit the emergency door, the two of them falling through the exit as alarms sounded throughout the base. Jude screamed, lashing out with fists and feet, anything to get Alvin off of him. A hard right to the side of the head dizzied his opponent, his grip loosening just enough to let Jude up. But it was short-lived, Alvin was on his feet again and ready to take him down.

Fists couldn't outdo a gun, but that didn't mean Jude wasn't going to try. But he was matched hit-for-hit, Alvin backing Jude into a corner of the yard. Jude went in for another blow to the head, needing a distraction so he could make a break for the gate, but Alvin seemed to anticipate this, bringing one hand up to block the hit while smacking the grip of the gun against Jude's temple with the other.

Jude staggered back, bracing one hand against the concrete wall to get his bearings. Before he could come to his senses, he was knocked to the ground once again, Alvin straddling his hips, pinning him firmly to the ground.

Another punch was thrown, connecting squarely with Alvin's jaw, splitting his lip. He growled almost ferally and gripped Jude's neck, the muzzle of his gun pressed against the boy's forehead. "I warned you, but you didn't listen." Alvin scathed, glaring down as he clawed at his arm, trying to get more air. "You could have backed down and gone home, but you had to play the damn meddling do-gooder. Now it's come to this."

Pinned down, gun to his head, Jude felt completely helpless. Alvin was too heavy to push off, and the hand around his neck only served to make him feel weaker and weaker. "A… Al… Don't…" He pleaded, tears brimming at the edges of his vision as he stared up at the man he had grown so close to. "Pl…ease… A-Al…vin…!"

The hand was pulled back from his neck, only to press painfully against his mouth. There was something different in Alvin's eyes. It wasn't just anger or rage, but sorrow, regret. But as soon as it came, it left, leaving nothing but coldness in his gaze to match the metal of the gun digging into the flesh of his forehead.

"I'm sorry, Jude." Alvin said softly, almost an apology, before pulling the trigger.


	10. Chapter 10

In those moments, he remembered his family.

Jude remembered his mother in Leronde, tearfully hugging him as he stood at the dock waiting for the ship to take him to Fennmont for the first time.. His father, not far off, turning away just when Jude thought he was tearing up as well, as if he didn't want to reveal how misty-eyed he was getting over his young son leaving home. There was Leia, who demanded he write her as much as possible and not forget to visit when he had breaks, and a promise that she would catch up to him someday.

Then the first time he met Professor Haus, how the esteemed researcher took him under his wing, allowed him to work far beyond what the other instructors were qualified. Jude could clearly hear his words of praise; "Even with your smaller than average mana lobe, you're proving to be the ideal student." And Jude felt like he was never deserving of such praise, but he accepted it only because his mentor would not allow him to deny it.

He recalled the harsh words of his father when he told him he was leaving Fennmont for Elympios. He called him a disappointment, that he was chasing a fool's dream by helping that dying world. It was hopeless, he reiterated again and again. The only way to reverse the damage done was to completely change their way of living. And Jude said he knew that, and that was why he was going. To change things.

Jude remembered taking that first, unsteady step onto the soil of Trigleph, looking at the dying city with a mix of anxiety and wonder. He recalled the weight of his suitcase in his hand, the tug of his backpack on his shoulders as he followed his mentor through the bustling streets that smelled of soot and decay. He was frightened back then, but the prospect of making a difference overrode any fears and spurred him onward.

His memory then shifted to that night, the look in the professor's eyes as he said he was going away for a while, that he wanted Jude to continue in his absence. If only he had known back then what would become of him, then maybe Jude would have known to leave while he was still ahead.

But he didn't.

He didn't and now it had come to this.

For a long moment, the only sound he could hear was the ringing in his ears, that and the quieter sound of his own ragged breathing. Eyes squeezed shut, frightened tears streaming down his face, Jude braced for the end. He waited for a splitting pain, the shattering of bone as the world would go quiet around him. And yet it only seemed to grow louder, even long after the trigger was pulled.

Slowly, tentatively, Jude opened his eyes. The ringing had subsided, replaced only with the echoes of fire alarms throughout the base. His trembling breath matched with Alvin's own, faint panting.

No pain, no hole in his head, just the thundering of his heart in his chest as that strong hand remained firmly gripping his jaw, silencing him. Jude locked eyes with Alvin only briefly before the man reached into the front pocket of his lab coat, plucking the GHS and quickly dialing a number. The line rang only twice before someone picked up, silence greeting him. Alvin didn't wait for the other party to speak.

"It's done." He stated, blunt, emotionless. The phone was dropped to the concrete and in one swift motion two bullets were fired, shattering the device beyond repair.

Alvin breathed a slow, steadying breath, before finally letting go of Jude's mouth. "Are you all ri-"

A fist collided with Alvin's nose as soon as Jude was released, hard enough to knock the man off his lap. Jude wasted no time in turning the tables, grabbing Alvin by his scarf and pinning him against the cold concrete much the same as the man had done to him moments before. "You _asshole_!" He shouted, arm coming up to sock Alvin across the jaw again. A cheap shot, but to Jude, it felt more than justified.

Alvin reeled from the punch, but took it all the same. "Okay, I deserved that." He groaned, flashing a haughty grin Jude's way. It was enough to make the boy want to punch him again.

"What the hell was that about?!" Jude's voice was shaking, the adrenaline rapidly leaving his system, leaving him feeling dizzy, worn. "Why are you doing this?! Who are you working for?!"

Alvin spat blood onto the concrete before gently tugging at Jude's wrists, trying to coax him to let go. "We can't talk here." He said softly, more blood dribbling from his split lip. "We need to get somewhere safe."

 _Somewhere safe?_ Jude almost laughed. The 'somewhere safe' had been wherever Alvin had led him. All this time, he felt protected because Alvin had been there, because Alvin was at his side, keeping any danger, real or imagined, at bay. But now… "You say this after trying to kill me?!"

"Damn it, Jude, there's no time!" Alvin grabbed his wrists more roughly now, tearing his grip away. "We need to go before the others get here!"

"Others?!"

Alvin pulled Jude brusquely to his feet, taking hold of his wrists and pulling him along. "We've got less than two hours before they realize I don't have a body to dump. We need to find a place to hole up before they catch us."

"They? Exodus?!"

"Less talking, more running!"

The trip to Duval went by like a blur.

Alvin had been running almost the entire time, keeping to the shadows of the side streets and alleys, his hand gripping Jude's the entire time. Always moving, constantly looking over their shoulders. It was as if Alvin thought they were already being pursued, but not once did Jude ask if this was true. He didn't want the answer.

They only barely caught the last train leaving Trigleph, the third-shift workers cramming into cars for final leg of their trip home. Alvin went along with the crowd, paying for one pass and using the last-train rush to mask his unticketed companion from the train's guards. Jude would protest if he'd noticed, but given the circumstances it would only fall on deaf ears. That aside, his GHS was gone; he had no way to pay for it anyway.

The whole trip Alvin kept his back to the wall, with Jude pulled close to his side as he hammered out text after text to a name Jude only vaguely recognized. Jude continued to watch Alvin, not speaking a word, as if the very mention of the group that was after him would make them appear. Jude was grateful for the amount of people around them; easier to hide, easier to blend in a crowd just in case Jude needed to make a run for it.

When they got off the train, Alvin led him down a familiar path once filled with fond memories of a night out, now clouded by anxiety and confusion. Alvin paid no mind to the _Sorry, We're Closed_ sign posted in the window of _Film Noir_ and pushed the door open, pulling Jude inside behind him. There, standing at the counter was a familiar pale man. Two-toned hair, smartly dressed in a blue jacket with suspenders and slacks, a pair of sizeable daggers strapped to his hips.

Jude knew this man, but only in passing. His name was…

"Ludger." Alvin wasted no time approaching the man, throwing formalities to the wayside. The other nodded, regarding Jude only briefly before pocketing his phone.

"I'm glad you made it safely." Ludger responded, his voice far different than what Jude would have expected. Soft, welcoming to his ears, a reprieve from the vibrato that Alvin always exuded. "I just got the broadcast. It's… It's not pretty, Alvin." He passed his GHS Alvin's way, letting him read over the mass text. "Julius has a team heading to Helioborg to intercept, but Rideaux's team is heading this way."

"Damn it… Breaking out the big guns for some kid." Alvin was becoming agitated again, and Jude couldn't quite understand why. Who were all these people? Were they all part of Exodus as well? Was he being led to his death? Jude wanted to ask, but Alvin continued before he could even form the question. "Does Julius know you're here?" He queried, handing the phone back.

Ludger shook his head, black fringe falling into his eyes. "No, I haven't spoken to him yet." He sighed, carefully tucking his hair back again before fiddling with the feathered charm of his GHS. "Even so, this is above both our heads, Alvin. The order is coming down from the board."

Alvin gave a short laugh at that, bringing a hand up to squeeze Jude's shoulder. "Figures. It's never easy, is it?"

Once again Ludger's gaze fell to the young researcher, eyes filled with worry and pity both. Jude was sure he looked just as petrified as he felt, standing there like a lost child hugging his lab coat close to his body like a security blanket. There was empathy in Ludger's gaze as a warm smile crossed his lips before disappearing completely, replaced with a determined frown. "This way." He hitched a thumb towards the back of the bar and motioned for the other two to follow.

With strength Jude wouldn't guess the slender man possessed, Ludger pulled one of the liquor displays to the side, revealing an old steel door. A single key was pulled from Ludger's pocket and jammed into the rusted lock, all the pins clicking audibly before the rusted door gave way to a narrow staircase. Ludger made the descent first, Alvin urging Jude to follow before heading down himself.

A thin chain was pulled overhead, the fluorescent panels flickering to life and illuminating the basement of _Film Noir._ It was small, the air around them damp and chilly. The furniture was scant, comprised of two single beds pushed into the far corners of the room, a worn dining set stacked near the entrance with a TV atop it.

"No one knows about this place except the barkeep and a few anti-governmentalists here in Duval. They won't look for you here."

"Thanks, Luds. I owe you one." Alvin clapped a hand on the other's shoulder, his expression almost triumphant.

Ludger, however, didn't appear so convinced. The friendly hand was brushed away and Ludger leveled a look towards Alvin. "You owe me an _explanation_ , but that's it. If they're sending Julius and Rideaux your way, you really got on Spirius's bad side."

Alvin shook his head, shrugging. "Not Spirius, I'm afraid. Not quite. I'll explain later."

Ludger's phone chimed and he pulled it from his pocket, frowning as he read over the text. "Stay down here. I'll signal if there's trouble."

Alvin nodded and Ludger disappeared up the steps, shutting the door behind him. It was then that his bodyguard finally turned to address him.

 _Former bodyguard_ , Jude reminded. _Bodyguards don't try to kill their charges._

"We should be safe for now." Alvin took a seat one of the beds, shrugging off his jacket and tossing it aside. "You should try and get some sleep. You had your two hours."

Jude crinkled his nose at the off-handed remark. How could Alvin be so calm at a time like this? There were soldiers hunting for him, Spirius agents even, and Exodus on top of that. Not only that, but Alvin had just tried to kill him, even if it was presumably an act to throw off their pursuers. The bruises from their scuffle remained on both their bodies, Jude far too shaken to focus on healing himself. There were too many questions to be asked, and they all started with Alvin.

"…You owe me an explanation, too." Jude muttered, eyes locking with Alvin's for the first time since he had pinned the man against the ground at Helioborg. He wanted, no, _needed_ answers, and Alvin was going to give them to him.

Alvin only held his gaze for only a brief second before looking away with a soft sigh. "You're probably wondering what's really going on."

"That's an understatement." Jude's anger beginning to bubble to the surface once again. He wasn't normally one to lose his cool. But this… This was an exception, and a big one at that.

"Fair enough." Alvin patted the spot next to him on the old mattress, inviting Jude to sit. Jude refused to go near him and instead pressed further against the cement wall. After what just happened, he didn't want to get near the man, let alone sit with him.

"Who are you?" He began. "Is Alvin even your real name?"

Alvin's expression faltered before falling completely. "You're not going to make this easy, are you?" He muttered before lifting his head to face Jude again. "My name is Alfred Vint Svent. I'm a mercenary and informant."

"And who hired you to watch after me?"

"Bisley Bakur of Spirius."

"And who else?"

Alvin didn't respond. Jude took a step forward, as if to threaten him. "Who else, Alvin?"

A moment later, Alvin answered, voice low and laced with what Jude hoped was genuine guilt. "Exodus as well."

Jude breathed a soft gasp as his fears were confirmed. The man who had been hired to protect him had been working for his pursuers all along. Then why-

"I know what you're thinking." Alvin interrupted his thoughts. "No, I'm not some crazy terrorist, and I've got nothing really against Rieze Maxians."

"But you do work for them, don't you?" Jude countered, voice shaking. He was afraid. Afraid of the man who for so long had been his constant source of comfort, now little more than a murderer out for his blood. "You work for the people who have been trying to kill me… To kill my people!"

"It's not that simple, Jude."

"Then simplify it!" Jude spat, bordering on losing it entirely.

Alvin was on his feet and before Jude in a flash, and he backed away, wanting as much distance between himself and the purported murderer as the cramped basement would allow. At the very least Alvin seemed to take the hint, allowing Jude his space.

After a tense few moments, Alvin finally spoke. "I was hired initially by Spirius to keep an eye on you and make sure you kept up your research."

"And… What did Exodus want you to do?" Jude asked weakly, almost afraid to hear the truth.

"I was also ordered by Exodus to get close to you, earn your trust, and make sure you stayed out of their hair."

Jude gulped thickly, hugging himself tighter, wishing he could curl up and disappear. "You knew, didn't you? About everything?" He muttered, eyes glued to the floor, afraid to face Alvin in that moment, as if locking eyes with the man would end with a pistol to his head again.

"Yeah…" Alvin answered quietly. "Yeah, I did."

Jude squeezed his eyes shut, fighting back angry tears as he continued. "The attack at the square…"

"I got tipped off."

"And… And the break in at my apartment?"

"They planned to interrogate you for information on Haus's file."

"The chem lab?"

"That one wasn't me." Alvin chuckled bleakly. "That was some freshman messing with dangerous chemicals."

Jude went quiet once again, the new information making his head spin. All those horrible things that had happened to him, Alvin had known about beforehand. He could have prevented them entirely, and yet he put Jude through more hell than he ever had to endure in his short life. And to what end? To get his unwavering trust? To make him so afraid of the outside world that Jude would have no choice but to rely on Alvin?

It was sick. Alvin was _sick_ and the room felt too small for the two of them. His chest felt tight, the musty air clogging his lungs as he absorbed the evidence he was given. Jude's limbs shook even more as he uttered another question, this one deciding whether or not he could ever trust Alvin again.

"…Professor Haus…" He mumbled, eyes slowly coming up to stare Alvin down. Frightened, yet determined. "Did you…"

"No." Alvin answered flat out, voice stern. "I wasn't part of that."

There was a soft sigh of relief with that knowledge, but not enough to uncoil the tightness in his chest. Jude continued, willing himself to keep his eyes on the older man. "So what was the point of all of it? Scare me until I gave up and went home?"

"Not quite." Alvin crossed his arms over his chest, appearing thoughtful whilst he spoke. "The idea was to keep you motivated. You were the closest to Haus, and the higher-ups in Spirius needed his research completed. But their reasons aren't as altruistic as they make them out to be." Another pause, as if Alvin was mulling over whether to let Jude know the next bit of info. "…Exodus also has a use for your work."

It all clicked.

"The Lance of Kresnik." Jude realized all at once why there was so much pressure on Haus and himself to finish their work. "Exodus wanted us to fix the Spyrix issue to power the Lance of Kresnik, is that it?"

Alvin was silent, but Jude couldn't take this sitting down. Jude sprung forward and grabbed Alvin by his scarf, yanking him down to his level. "Tell me, is my research going towards the Otherworld Reactor Plan?" Jude gave him a rough shake. "Are they going to use it to take the spirits from Rieze Maxia and use them as fuel?! Do they want me dead because I know about it?!"

There it was, that look of guilt again. Alvin couldn't meet his gaze, instead staring at the wall while gritting his teeth.

"It's better you don't know." He finally mumbled, but Jude wasn't hearing it.

"Like hell it's better!" Jude shook him again and Alvin finally looked his way.

"Easy, kid!" Alvin gently gripped his wrists, trying to get Jude to ease up on his neck. "You need to calm down."

Something inside Jude snapped and he wanted nothing more than to give Alvin another bloody lip for even daring to rebuke him in such a way. "Calm down? _Calm down?!_ " Each sentence was accentuated with another firm shake to Alvin's person. "My research is being used by a terrorist group and my bodyguard _works for them_! How am I supposed to _calm down!_ "

Alvin growled angrily before roughly grabbing Jude by his shoulders and shoving him, the other only barely managing to stop himself before his head collided with the wall. "If you're so worried about it, go home and forget about what you saw!"

"And then what, wait for Spirius to hire someone else to finish the job? Wait for Balan to figure out the loose ends? Is that what you want?!" He was shouting again, and didn't care. Too much, too much. "I came to Elympios to help your people. I can't just go home and wait for Exodus to destroy it!"

There's a knock on the ceiling tiles, a heeled boot dragged across the wooden floor of the bar above them. Alvin only took a split second to act, grabbing the cord for the lamps and killing the lights, enveloping them both in darkness.

"What are you-" Jude felt himself tugged towards Alvin, throwing him into a panic. He desperately pushed at the man's chest, struggling to get free of his grip. "Let me go!" Jude demanded, voice cracking with a desperate fear as he continued to fight against his restraints.

A hand clapped over his mouth and for a brief moment he froze, waiting for the pistol to press against his forehead again. But no such action came. Instead he felt Alvin's breath against his skin, shushing him quietly.

There was a parade of footfalls above their heads, knocking dust down from the ceiling and onto them. He could hear someone shouting demands, threats, and he realized that the team Ludger mentioned had barged into the bar, and that the thin man was up there alone.

More threats were made, commands that Jude could barely make out. Then, the sound of gunfire and shattering glass, the pounding of feet and cries of pain. Jude's heart dropped into the pit of his stomach at the scene he imagined was playing out a mere meter above their heads..

Jude tugged away from his mouth, "We have to help him!" He whispered harshly, only to have Alvin shush him again.

"Ludger can handle it." Alvin muttered into his ear. "He doesn't look it, but he's a Spirius Agent."

"But Spirius Agents are _after us_ , aren't they?"

The brush of hair against his skin gave the illusion of Alvin nodding. "This situation goes deeper than you can imagine, kid. Just remember that Spirius is the one pursuing you right now, not Exodus."

"That…" There was another shout from above, cutting off Jude's line of thought. The scuffle seemed to intensify before reaching a crescendo, then fell completely silent. Alvin and Jude waited silently as the boots filed out, leaving just the scraping of broken glass against old wood floors.

Another tap of boots overhead, then a drag, same as before. Alvin breathed a short sigh of relief before clicking the lights on again. No sooner did the room illuminate than Jude became keenly aware of how close Alvin was, his back pressing against Alvin's chest, arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders. Jude glanced up at him, almost shyly as the lights flickered just above Alvin's head, giving him an almost angelic glow as he smirked down at his young charge. A calloused hand came up to gently rub at the reddened patch left by Alvin gripping his mouth so suddenly, a sort of apology shared by touch. Jude allowed himself to lean into it, eyes fluttering closed, comforted by the tender touch.

For a glimmer of a second Jude felt at ease, Alvin holding him close, bringing him a sense of comfort, just like before. But the feeling left as soon as it had come, replaced with the dread stemming from too many lies revealed all at once. Jude roughly pushed away, backing himself against the wall again. No, this tenderness, the kindness bestowed upon him, it was all an act. It had been an act from the beginning so Jude would trust Alvin incontestably.

And this fact hurt just as much as the bullet would have.

"I can't believe this…" Jude breathed, pressed against the concrete wall as if it was the only thing holding him up. "All this time… Everything you did was just pretend, wasn't it?"

There was no confirmation nor denial, just the sound of Jude trying to keep his emotions in check and failing miserably.

And then, there was a touch, soft against his crown. "Jude, listen… I…"

Alvin's hand was smacked away, the fire in Jude's eyes only countered by the tears threatening to fall.

"Don't touch me!" He spat venomously, his voice sounding foreign to even himself. "I trusted you, and all this time you've been lying to me! You made me think that you… Actually…" he trailed off, unable to say what had hurt him the most. Everything Alvin had done, all those smiles, the longing touches, the unspoken words… _You made me think you actually cared…_

Jude's shoulders shook as the dam finally broke, tears cascading down his face as he sunk to the floor.

And Alvin said nothing, even as Jude sobbed into his knees. Too much… He played the part of the mature adult, but deep down… Jude knew he was still a child. He was vulnerable to the madness of this world, and it was because of this madness that he had reached out so desperately to Alvin when he offered his hand. He had relied on him fully, trusted him with his life and then some, only to have all of that crushed. And even now he couldn't understand why Exodus was going through such lengths to keep him on edge, or why Spirius chose to send people to take him back. What had he done? What was happening behind the closed doors of Spirius HQ? And… Why did Alvin choose to spare him?

Jude looked back to the events leading up to that moment, realizing who it was that had saved him at risk of his own life; Alvin had, each time. He ran in head first into a chemical fire to get Jude out safely. Alvin had gotten shot trying to get them away from the clash at the square. He even held him as he cried, lamenting over the destruction in his home. One could argue that this was inconsequential, that Alvin was doing it as part of the massive farce that was their budding relationship. An act, and nothing more.

But…

Alvin had asked him to go to dinner that night knowing that agents were coming for him. He had repeatedly urged Jude to stay home the day of the attack, yet he refused and went to class anyway. And the chem lab… Even if he didn't know about it, Alvin had still insisted on staying with him.

Was it all part of the plan? Or did Alvin legitimately care about him? Jude could know nothing unless he asked, and yet he was afraid of the answer he may receive.

He just couldn't bring himself to ask.

Finally, Alvin sighed and walked past him, presumably heading for the stairs. "I'm gonna check on Ludger. You wait here." And with that, he disappeared up the steps, the opening and closing of the door signaling that Jude was alone.

He wondered if it was better this way.


	11. Chapter 11

It felt like hours had passed, but the old clock on the wall begged to differ.

Jude had managed to pull himself up from the floor and onto one of the musty beds in a meager attempt at sleep. The bar above was quiet, Alvin and Ludger having left some time ago, leaving him alone in the dank basement. Part of him wondered if it was easier that way; for Alvin to leave him alone, give him the space he needed after what happened. Maybe Alvin wouldn't come back, maybe he'd take the opportunity to hightail it out of town and onto his next job.

Or maybe he was going with Ludger to turn him in. Wouldn't it be fitting, to Alvin turn him in alongside an enemy agent. Given all that had happened, Jude wasn't beyond believing it either. It hurt to think that the man he had entrusted his life to was one of the bad guys all along. Was it really only a matter of time before he outlived his usefulness and ended up with a bullet in his head?

 _But…If my research was helping Exodus… That makes me a bad guy too, doesn't it?_

He didn't know anymore. How much of his hard work had gone towards their mad scheme? How many days, weeks, hell, _months_ of his work had ended up in Exodus's hands, and at what cost? And above all, how had he not figured it out sooner?

Jude curled in on himself, pulling his knees to his chest. _I'm such an idiot… I thought all this time that I could help the Elympions… But everything I've done…_ The urge to cry came over him again, but Jude vehemently fought it off. Crying wasn't going to reverse what had happened. And yet Jude didn't know what he could do, or if there was even anything he _could_ do. He was just one person going up against a terrorist group and possibly the biggest corporation this side of the border. If Professor Haus couldn't stand against them, how was Jude expected to last? It wasn't just one lone gunman, but several groups of trained agents, all after his head and the information he had discovered.

 _But…_ It dawned on Jude. _If they're allocating all those resources to capture me, then…_

Jude sat up, his hand patting the front pocket of his lab coat, once a pristine white, now muddied and bloodied beyond repair. The disc from the lab remained there, unscratched, safe. _These documents… They could easily get the archive from the lab computer, but they're still chasing me. That means…_

The door at the head of the stairs slammed open and Jude was on high alert again. Had Spirius come for him? Had Exodus? He flung the musty sheets off and flew to his feet, fist raised in the stance that had been engrained in his mind since childhood. If he was going down, he was going down fighting with everything he had.

But there was no stamping of steel-toed boots coming down the stairs, no threats for Jude to surrender, just two sets of footfalls making their way slowly down the steps.

"You awake, kid?"

From around the corner came Alvin and Ludger, both looking like they had just come out of a lengthy brawl. Judging from the number of soldiers that had broken into the bar earlier, Jude wouldn't be surprised if there _had_ been a brawl. But by the looks of it, they had made it out on the winning side.

Relief flickered across Alvin's features when he caught sight of Jude, but he came no closer than the entry, as if sensing the tension from a distance. Ludger, however, took a seat at the old table with some effort. It appeared he had taken quite the beating, his arms and face bruised, dried blood caking his hair. Jude's first instinct was to go over and heal them both, but given the circumstances, he remained.

It was Alvin that spoke first. "Spirius is out in full-force looking for you." An obvious statement, but it confirmed Jude's theory never the less. "Ludger slipped one of Rideaux's cronies some false intel to throw them off, but we can't stay here much longer. We need a plan."

Questions remained, and with the grip on his emotions ever tightening, he decided to get down to business. "Alvin, how is Spirius involved in all this?" Jude queried, stance relaxing only slightly. His gaze trailed over to Ludger, suspicious of the soft-spoken man. Ludger was sitting quietly, gently massaging his right arm with his left, avoiding eye-contact. One had to wonder how many soldiers he fought through just to get back to the bar, and to what end. "Are they connected with Exodus?"

"Spirius as a whole? No, at least not that I know of. Some bigwigs in Spirius with a lot of gald to throw around? Yes, definitely." Alvin brushed past him and took a seat on the old bed opposite of Jude. Only then did he note the deep bruises on the mercenary's face, the tears in his clothing. How much was from their scuffle at Helioborg? Jude hadn't taken stock of either of their conditions as they were running, far too preoccupied with keeping his head down and out of sight. "Since you accessed restricted information at the lab and ran, they're using that as an excuse to take you in. It'll probably be on the news in the morning."

Jude lowered his arms fully, his face falling. "So that's how they're going to play it… Make me out to be some AWOL scientist trying to run with their corporate secrets."

"You don't sound surprised."

"Should I be?" Jude crossed his arms over his chest, frowning deeply. "It's obvious that my having that information jeopardizes their operation in some way."

Alvin shook his head with a bit of a sardonic chuckle. "So, you've already figured it out. Balan was right, you _are_ a genius."

The off comment would have once given him butterflies. Now, it only earned Alvin a deadpan stare. "Save it, Alvin." He ordered. It was about time he got the man to talk. He owed Jude at least that much. "You know something about that archive. I need you to come clean."

Just like that, Alvin's expression fell and appeared to take a particular interest in the color of his boots. He was being avoidant, just as Jude expected, but he wasn't going to allow it for long.

"I…" Alvin sighed. "I don't know the specifics. They keep people like me in the dark on things like that." Their eyes met, but Alvin seemed to have trouble holding his gaze. It was as if he were… remorseful. But as soon as Jude noticed, the mask was on again and Alvin playing the part of the care-free, cocky mercenary.

"Yeah, initially I was ordered to put a bullet between your eyes if you found out what Haus's research was going towards-"

"So it _is_ going towards the Otherworld Reactor Plan." Jude had already figured this much, but he needed Alvin to confirm it. He needed Alvin to tell him the _truth_.

On the other end of the room, Ludger's head snapped to attention with a soft gasp. Jude looked his way, surprised. "Do you know about it?" He asked of the pale man, and Jude realized it was the first time he had spoken directly to him.

At his question, Ludger shook his head sheepishly. "It was shut down when I was an infant. Nationalists continue to try and lobby it to resolve the energy crisis, but they're rejected due to the open border treaties."

"Even with the border restriction lifted, there are still people who think just _taking_ our spirits is the best option?" It was hard to conceive. Did the nationalists not understand how vital spirits were to Rieze Maxians? It was a virtuous cycle, one that allowed the citizens and spirits to co-exist peacefully and indefinitely. "If they remove the spirits, then Rieze Maxia will end up barren just like Elympios!"

"They don't care."

Jude and Ludger turned to face Alvin as he spoke, the older man's eyes glued to the ground once again. "If it helps them, they don't care whatever the cost. If it keeps Elympios going for another thousand years, then they've achieved their goal."

"But my people _rely_ on spirits! If you kill them-"

"You think I don't know that? You think I like going along with this plan?" Alvin was on his feet and towering over him, as if his height alone would be enough to intimidate Jude into backing off.

Jude wasn't about to give him the satisfaction. "You haven't told me otherwise, have you? When it comes down to it, who are you siding with? Spirius, Exodus?" He locked eyes with Alvin, staring, showing he wasn't going to back down. He couldn't, not if he wanted to make things right again.

Alvin gritted his teeth and tore his gaze away, raking his hands through his hair. He was struggling with something, that much Jude knew. But what it was continued to be a mystery, one that didn't sit well with the young researcher. Even if Alvin claimed not to know specifics, he was still part of Exodus, and that put him closer to the heart of this scheme than anyone he knew.

And in that same vein, Ludger was just as close.

The pale man stood, steadying himself against the old table that creaked in protest. "I need to call Julius." He muttered, swaying slightly as he pushed away from the worn furniture. Without hesitation Jude caught him by his forearm, coaxing him back into his seat. Their eyes met, Ludger's full of confusion, Jude's with worry.

"Let me look at your wounds." Jude insisted, gently lifting the dyed bangs from Ludger's eyes to reveal a sizable gash on his forehead. The bleeding had stopped, but it was bruised pretty badly. Ludger gave a soft noise, something between an agreement and a gasp as Jude cast the healing arte.

The room went silent as Jude put his skills to use. Every now and again Ludger would give a soft sigh of relief as the damage disappeared from his skinny limbs, leaving nothing to indicate he had been in a struggle at all.

"Ludger, was it?" Jude spoke while he continued to work. "You work for Spirius, right? Why are you helping us?"

At first, Ludger seemed perplexed by his question. Was it really so strange to ask? Or was it because he didn't know, himself?

It took him a moment to answer, but when he did, it surprised Alvin and Jude both.

"I'm a Spirius Agent, yes, but…" He shook his head, flecks of dried blood falling from his hair. "After hearing what was happening from Alvin, it didn't sit right with me. I couldn't just blindly follow orders and take the life of an innocent." This man was kind, Jude could tell. In spite of the training that Spirius Agents were known to endure, it would seem this man maintained the sense of morality that many others lacked. Ludger could have easily ended Jude's life and receive honors from his peers, and yet he was hiding along with them, helping the target that he was ordered to eliminate.

Jude wondered if, given different circumstances, Ludger and he could have been close. Perhaps even as close as he and Alvin were.

"You'd really go against everyone just to help some runaway researcher?" Jude asked, a little breathless from the exertion of healing already. "Even if it causes you trouble?"

Ludger smiled, a little shaky, but his resolve remained. "You're the one they called to help us, aren't you? You're trying to fix things for us Elympions. That's enough for me to consider your side."

It felt like the first time someone outside his circle of friends had acknowledged his efforts, and that alone made his chest feel infinitely lighter.

"Yeah… Yeah, I am."

Jude sat back on his haunches and smiled, feeling slightly dizzied from the exertion of healing so many injuries. Once again he was reminded of how difficult it was to use artes in a land with so few spirits to call on. The spell ended up being more of his own mana being poured into the patient's body than the spirits'. Alvin's injuries would have to wait.

After several moments, Jude stood, taking a deep breath to calm his shaking limbs. "Alvin." He turned to face his former bodyguard fully, pinning him down with a gaze. "I know you know what that disc means to Exodus. I need you to tell me."

Alvin sighed, raking his hand through his hair, looking everywhere but Jude. Again he seemed conflicted, struggling with the right words. Jude could only speculate why. "I don't know the specifics, but what I _do_ know is that the information on that disc is enough to shut down their plans for good."

Just as Jude suspected. He hadn't a chance to go through the files thoroughly, but he imagined there was more to that archive than just internal memos and publically circulated research papers. Haus had gathered those files with the express purpose of doing _something_ with them… But he must have known something would have happened to him, or else he would have gone public right away.

Except, he hadn't. Haus had intended to run, and as much as it hurt Jude to consider, leave him holding the bag as well. Had he been threatened beforehand? Did he know what he had gotten into?

It didn't do him much good to dwell on it now. Exodus _was_ after him now, and they _did_ intend on killing him. It was only a matter of time before they tracked him down, and none of them could stay in that basement for the rest of their lives. They needed a plan.

But… What?

Alvin seemed to have the answer this time.

"We have two choices." Alvin was before him before he could blink, holding the disc from the lab before Jude's nose. When did he get it? "We can either destroy this thing, pretend you never saw anything, and you seek asylum in Rieze Maxia. You give up your research and your goal, but you live the rest of your life relatively safe from Exodus's wrath."

He paused, and for a moment Jude wondered if he had heard Alvin's voice waver, or if it was just his imagination. "Or, we face them head on, blow this thing wide open. We take a stand against Exodus and the Board members funding them at the risk of our own lives."

Alvin took his hand, and Jude almost yanked it away, but before the fear could spur the action the disc was pressed against his palm.

"Which do you choose, Jude?"

Jude stared up at Alvin, unsure of which path he should choose. On the one hand there was the means to escape; he could go home, take up work at the clinic like his father wanted him to, and let Elympios deal with the problem they created. He could live peacefully and help people in much the same way his parents had, by supporting their tiny island community as their doctor.

But even if he ran, even if he claimed asylum, it wouldn't end. He'd spend the rest of his life looking over his shoulder, mistrusting every person he met with ill-conceived notions of their ulterior motives. Exodus would continue their work, probably drag another young student into their devious scheme, and eventually the research would bear fruit.

Or, he could stand and fight. Put an end to Exodus's plans, and save the spirits he had vowed to protect when he left home.

The very idea was terrifying, but... _If I don't do this… Who will?_

"I… I want to stop Exodus." His voice shook, fingers trembled, but the determination was clear in his eyes. "Even if it means putting my own life at risk, if I can do _something_ to fix things…" The disc was held close to his chest, Jude's eyes slipping closed, as if making a wish. This was his decision, his mission. "Then I'll do whatever it takes."

A myriad of emotions crossed Alvin's face, as if he was surprised by Jude's response, and yet not at all. He took a seat upon the musty bed, sighing softly. "You're ready to go up against Spirius and Exodus for this?"

"Of course I'm not ready." His grip tightened on the disc as if it were the only thing tethering him to that small moment of bravery. "But I made it my goal to help the two worlds. If I ran away now…"

The people he had met, the friends he had made… Even if he managed to escape Exodus's clutches, Jude knew he could never face them again. Not Balan, not Mary, not Leia… or Alvin.

Alvin…

Jude bit his lip. Disc or not, he was just one person facing down a veritable army. He needed help, and the one person equipped enough for that stood before him. For a moment he watched Alvin, looking for any sort of direction, any encouragement from the older man. And yet when Jude laid eyes upon Alvin he didn't see the confident man he had come to know, but one that was conflicted, as if torn between orders and his own emotions. Alvin had been ordered to take Jude's life, and yet he spared him. Now the both of them were on the run, with Exodus and Spirius on their trail. And so far, Jude had no idea why he had let him live. Was it because of some greater mission? Was he, too, ready to stand against Exodus? Or was it something more personal than that?

Whatever his reasons, Jude knew he couldn't face Exodus alone.

"Alvin." The call of his name grabbed Alvin's attention, yet the bewilderment remained on his features. There was comfort in knowing that Alvin felt just as lost as he did. "If I'm going to do this, I'll need your help."

Jude extended a hand to Alvin, a soft smile crossing his face, the first offered to the man since the incident. "Come with me, and we can fix this… For everyone."

The smile was returned, and Alvin took his hand. For a brief second Jude thought he saw Alvin lean closer, as if he intended to embrace him like before, but had decided against it. Instead, he stood, clapping a hand on Jude's shoulder.

"Sounds like my little Honor's Student is ready for some rebellion." He smirked Jude's way. The joke was forced, but appreciated none the less. "Well, if we're going against the big guys, we're going to need all the help we can get."

"I'll help." Said Ludger as he stood with considerably more ease. "I can keep Spirius off your trail long enough for you to get away safely."

Alvin seemed surprised by this. "Even if it means lying to your brother?"

Ludger faltered, but quickly recovered. "I don't know where Julius stands on all of this, but I can only hope that he'll make the same decision I am now."

"You two are really close, aren't you? What does Erston think of that?" Alvin elbowed his friend, grinning cheekily as Ludger sputtered and blushed.

Jude chuckled at the display; they must have been good friends. "Thank you, Ludger."

Ludger nodded, sheepishly scratching at the back of his neck. He was definitely someone he'd want to be friends with. Perhaps when this was all over, they could be.

"Welp." Alvin leaned back to pop his back with groan. "Sounds like I have some favors to call in." He winked at Jude before pulling his GHS from his pocket and dialing.

Her name was Presa, and she did not like Alvin. Or at least that was what Jude gathered from what could be heard of their conversation at the top of the stairs. Ludger and Jude continued to exchange concerned looks as Alvin received what could only be a verbal lashing that had been brewing for some time. If this was one of the favors Alvin was calling in, then he'd hate to see what the rest of his contacts thought of him.

The yelling eventually ceased as Alvin explained their situation, or at least the results thereof. He explained he needed out, and that he had to show "them" something. Who "they" were, Jude wasn't sure, but he imagined he'd find out.

The call ended and Alvin emerged from the steps, exasperated. Jude could count on one hand the number of times he had seen the man that irritated, and a majority of them were a result of his poor sleeping habits. His GHS was snapped shut and pocketed before he addressed the room.

"Tonight we're getting on a merchant cart to Marksburg. From there, we're getting on a ship to Lakutam Seahaven."

"Lakutam? We're going to Rieze Maxia?" For a brief moment Jude thought Alvin intended to run after all, or at least leave Jude somewhere away from Spirius's grasp. But the look in Alvin's eyes said he had a plan, Jude just hoped it was a good one.

"Once we dock we're heading to Xian Du. I have a place there we can rest. Then I'll talk to Yurgen about getting us to Kanbalar."

Jude blinked in surprise. "Kanbalar? Why there of all places?" But as soon as the words left his mouth, it occurred to him what was in Kanbalar, and it all clicked. "Wait… You don't mean you're taking this to the King?!"

Alvin gave a curt nod, crossing his arms. "Exposing this to anyone in Elympios will get us nothing but a cover up and a bullet in both our heads. But if we give the info to the big wigs in Rieze Maxia…"

"Then they can demand answers at the risk of destroying any diplomatic relations between the two countries." Jude finished, and Alvin grinned.

"Now you're catching on."

It made sense, but at the same time, it didn't. From Jude's standpoint going to Rieze Maxia with all the information seemed the simplest way to bring an end to the Otherworld Reactor Plan and whatever Exodus had in store for them. But at the same time, it put the Elympions in a situation where they could potentially lose all aid that their neighbors had provided, limiting trade at best, and closing the border at worst.

And where did Alvin stand on that? He had to know.

"Alvin, are you sure this is the way you want to go? Depending on the king's reaction, it could ruin what hope Elympios has for recovery." Jude took a step forward and Alvin turned away, his expression unreadable. This couldn't have been easy for him, could it?

"Don't get me wrong, kid. I love my country, but…" He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose between thumb and forefinger. "Just know that I'm standing with you on this."

"Even though you have family in Exodus?" The man flinched at the question. Jude recalled the memo, the name of the man that claimed to be in charge of their operation. He must have been someone Alvin knew.

Alvin didn't answer, just shook his head with a heavy sigh. It was all he would get out of him on the matter.

After a moment of silence, Ludger got to his feet, pulling his own phone from his pocket. "If you two are leaving tonight, then I need to make sure the roads are clear." He smiled over at Jude, appearing just as tired as Jude felt. Alvin wasn't the only one going against family in this. Jude couldn't imagine what it would have been like knowing that you stood on the opposite side of someone you cared about. If it were him… He didn't know if he could do it. There were already people that were probably worried sick about him just being gone this long, he couldn't imagine having to actually fight them.

Ludger gathered his things to leave and made it to the steps before Jude stopped him. "I know we're asking a lot of you, but I have a favor to ask."

The pale man paused at the foot of the steps, turning to face Jude, waiting for him to speak.

"In Trigleph, there's a girl working for the paper named Leia… Could you tell her I'm all right and that I'll contact her soon?" Jude chuckled a bit, toying with a bit of hair. "Once she gets wind of what's going on, she'll chase me across the globe to demand an explanation. So just tell her I'm safe."

Even Ludger had to laugh a little at that image, but he nodded all the same. "I will." He gave Alvin a wave before disappearing up the steps. He had his own work to do.

The door creaked shut at the top of the stairs and Jude felt himself deflate. What little fumes he had been running off of seemed to go dry completely, leaving him feeling utterly exhausted. He allowed himself to collapse onto the bed, staring sleepily up at the ceiling. How many hours had he been awake now?

"You should sleep while you can." Alvin took a seat on the bed across from him, bringing Jude to attention once more. "The cart won't pass through for another couple of hours, then we'll be off."

"Yeah…" Jude answered, half-hearted. Was he really doing this? Fleeing the country as a criminal and going to see the king? It all seemed so farfetched, like a wild story that Leia would have come up with after reading too many adventure novels. But it was the reality he was facing now, and Jude would have to accept that.

But it wasn't just his current goal, but the events leading up to it that he had yet to fully compartmentalize into cohesive thoughts. His brush with death at the hands of Alvin, the man he was now counting on to escort him safely to Kanbalar. Was it really all an act? Could he really trust him?

He wanted to, more than anything. Jude wanted that, and yet…

Jude rose, facing the man who sat resting with his face buried in his hands. "Alvin… About before…"

Alvin's head rose long enough to regard him with a grim stare before being buried again, his auburn locks swaying with as he shook his head. "I didn't want to do it, but if I didn't make it believable, they would have taken me out too. You gotta understand who we're dealing with, Jude."

Jude nodded even though Alvin couldn't see it. He accepted the man's words without question, though it only lead to more confusion. If it was all an act… What else was? And how much of what Alvin told him leading up to this was real?

He felt his chest tighten with rising anxiety, and decided to drop it for now. It would do him no good to dwell on petty things like that now; he had a mission, and he was going to complete it no matter what.

 _I will fix things, Alvin. I promise._


	12. Chapter 12

"Quit touching it, kid."

Jude had his hand swatted away from his hair for at least the third time that morning. In an attempt to keep them under the radar, Alvin had taken the time to style Jude's hair and offer him a change of clothes. Where the man had procured the clothing Jude hadn't the chance to ask, but he did have to wonder why Elympions had such an obsession with layers; two shirts and a vest, one pair of pants with what could only be described as chaps. The top fit okay, but he needed a belt to keep the pants from falling down his slim waist.

He felt mildly uncomfortable in such strange attire, and all but naked without his lab coat. But Alvin had insisted that the change in wardrobe was critical to their escape plans. When he wasn't in his school uniform he generally wore clothing brought from home, not being able to afford the pricey fashions of Elympios on top of his living expenses. Synthetic fabrics felt very different from the cotton and wool he was so used to sporting, but in spite of the many layers the outfit seemed to be easier to move in, a little airier. And at the very least he wasn't a walking billboard saying "I'm from Rieze Maxia".

He scratched at his head again, the gel making his scalp itch. Jude desperately wanted a comb to get his hair to behave, but he had been urged to leave it. The "I just woke up like this" style was apparently very hip in Elympios, and yet Jude was left to wonder why Alvin took the time to do his hair neatly every morning. Must have been part of his "fashion sense".

"Jude. I'll have to put more gel in if you keep messing with it." Alvin warned, gently grabbing his wrist, tugging it down to rest on Jude's thigh. The space they were allotted in the back of the merchant's cart was barely enough for the two of them, Jude having to sit almost awkwardly close, sidled against Alvin shoulder to shoulder. It was uncomfortable not for the cramped space, but for the close proximity to the other man. Before he would not have minded Alvin being so near, in fact he would have craved it. But things had changed in the last twelve hours (had it really only been that? Jude was still reeling from it) and now Jude only felt nervous and trapped.

Jude huffed to cover his nerves, pulling his wrist away. "It itches… When we get to Lakutam, I'd like to take a shower."

Alvin chuckled from his nose, bringing an elbow up to rest on Jude's shoulder, leaning close. "You know, that's a good look on you. Very sexy." He teased, which only earned him a swat on the arm from Jude. He couldn't wait to get to Marksburg, more specifically out of that cart.

 _Can I really do this?_ Jude asked himself, gazing between the canvas draping of the cart and out to the dirt road behind him. He had only just made his decision, yet he was already questioning his resolve. _Will the King even listen? Would giving him this information really solve the problem?_ He sighed, resting his head against the side of the wooden cart. _What if he doesn't take me seriously? He doesn't have any reason to believe me over any of the diplomats he has contact with… What will I do if he just throws out our case?_

Jude pulled the disc from the pocket and stared at it as he tried to piece together his tumultuous thoughts. _Maybe it'd be better just to go to Leronde and see my dad. Maybe he could help us?_ Jude quickly shook his head, dispelling the idea. _No, he's probably livid after hearing what happened on the news. I can't face that right now._

The disc was tucked away into the buttoned pocket of his vest and safe from view. Everything rode on his ability to deliver this information to the king and plead his case. Jude just hoped it would all work out as planned.

"Do you think Ludger is okay?" Jude asked, wishing to pass the time with something other than the topic of his appearance. They had left the man behind in Drellin with little more than a 'good luck' before parting. Now he was facing what could potentially be an army of Spirius agents for their sake, asking nothing in return. Jude made a mental note to buy the man dinner when they saw each other next.

If they saw each other.

"Yeah, Ludger will be fine. He's a spindly guy, but he's got powerful friends." Alvin shrugged, a motion felt all too well with their close proximity. "Not to mention that brother of his will probably drop Spirius like a bad habit once he gets wind of what's happening. He's loyal to his job, but even more loyal to his family."

"Does Ludger really have such influential people at his side?" Jude asked, honestly surprised. He didn't seem like someone who would have such a commanding presence that he would attract the purportedly powerful allies Alvin talked about.

Alvin cast a smirk his way. "You'll find out soon enough that you don't mess with Ludger Will Kresnik."

Jude wasn't sure what Alvin meant, but he wasn't sure he wanted to find out either.

They arrived at Marksburg by midday. The square was already bustling with pedestrians attending the market, providing plenty of cover for them to move through. Alvin ordered Jude to stick close, keeping a firm hand on his wrist as they weaved in and out of alleyways and side streets. They'd stop at each corner while Alvin took the time to check for anyone that may be a Spirius agent. Jude remembered him doing this once before, back when they were fleeing from the attack at Telegraph Square. He was playing the part of the proper bodyguard, and while that made Jude smile it also looked suspicious as hell.

Alvin waited for the crowd to debark from the incoming vessel before pulling Jude from the alley and towards the ticketer. Nailed to the post at the dock was a crudely drawn rendition of an aggressive man with black hair and gold eyes. Jude would have laughed if it wasn't a wanted poster, and if the rendition wasn't supposed to be him. All of a sudden he was thankful for Alvin taking the time to alter his appearance so drastically.

The ticketer was presented with fake papers, ones that were either very convincing or the man at the counter was too lazy to pick up on their illegitimacy. They were given passes for the ship leaving for Lakutam and made their way towards the boarding area. Alvin guided them to the loading end of the dock, pulling Jude behind a stack of crates to wait while the other passengers finished boarding. The less time they spent on the ship in plain sight while docked, the better.

Jude sunk to the ground, leaning back against the crates and breathing slow, even breaths. Just a little longer and they'd be out of Elympios and in the safety of Rieze Maxia, his homeland. There was comfort in that, but at the same time the butterflies continued to clog his chest.

Alvin crouched next to him, resting a hand against his shoulder. "You doing all right, kid?"

Jude nodded, wanting to brush the hand away, his touch making the butterflies rebel even more. Instead he went for a topic change. "Where did you get those travel papers?"

Alvin settled next to him, arms resting on his knees. "I've got connections. It's common in my line of work to need passes like that."

"And you had them with you because…?"

"…Why do you think?"

Jude frowned; he already knew Alvin's answer. _In case you needed to cut and run._

"Does it bother you?" The mercenary asked, leaning forward as if trying to catch Jude's gaze.

It only earned him another shake of the head, Jude refusing to continue that topic of conversation. Once his job was over Alvin had planned to leave Rieze Maxia and go onto whatever new mission Exodus had in store for him. Clearly having Jude alive put a wrench in those plans, but that did lead Jude to wonder why he had _two_ passes.

Maybe Jude had been part of the plan all along. He wished that was the case.

The bell sounded on the deck of the ship, last call for boarding. Alvin stood, dusting off his pants before offering a hand to Jude. It was denied, the boy instead getting to his feet unaided. "Let's go." He brushed past Alvin, heading for the loading ramp.

His small display of defiance was short-lived. No sooner had Jude rounded the crate did he run headlong into someone. He staggered back, rubbing at his nose and mumbling a quick apology. Then he looked up, coming face to face with a guard a helmet shy of full armor, and from _Helioborg_ no less.

Oh, of _course_ the patrol shift would have changed by then. And why _wouldn't_ the guards come to Marksburg to spend the day after their shift?

"Hey, aren't you-"

The guard had Jude's fist in his face before he could finish the question, downing him in one blow. From the other end of the dock shouts could be heard, more off-duty guards coming to aid their comrade.

 _Shit… I messed up._

Shots were fired their way and Alvin grabbed Jude by the upper arm, tugging him behind the crates again. "Really, kid? You _had_ to punch him?"

"I panicked!" He protested as the guards encroached on them. Alvin cursed, firing a shot blindly around the corner in hopes of warding them off. The ship began to pull away, the crew undoubtedly wanting to get as far from the firefight as possible.

Without warning, Alvin wrapped his arm around Jude's waist and hoisted him effortlessly from the ground, breaking out in a run towards the boat. Jude yelped in protest, squeezing his eyes shut as they rapidly approached the end of the dock, bullets flying around them. Jude had never been more grateful for the budget cuts to the Helioborg marksman program.

Alvin hit the end of the dock and leaped, catching more air than Jude thought possible without the aid of some sort of wind arte. They landed unceremoniously upon the upper deck of the ship, Alvin tumbling onto the planks with Jude skidding to a halt just a few feet away. The passengers gasped, backing away from the new additions to their group.

An official looking man approached Alvin, keeping his distance while he yelled at the two who somehow managed to _jump_ onto his ship. "What in Undine's name was that all about?" He spat, fists balled in an attempt to look menacing.

Alvin merely stood, shaking off the impact of their landing and with a cocky grin. "Oh, that? One of that guy's exes." He pointed to Jude, who squeaked at the accusation. "Not a friendly guy; gets violent whenever he sees him with another man." Alvin leaned closer, a hand shielding his face as if divulging a secret. "Never date Elympion guards. They're _possessive_."

The sailor took a step back, ears turning red. He quickly glanced to Jude before shaking his head, demanding their papers. He looked them over before shoving them against Alvin's chest. "Keep it at a minimum, boys. There are _children_ aboard."

"Aye, sir." Alvin gave him a wink, which only served to make the sailor redder before he left to attend his duties. The crowd dispersed, the passengers filing below deck to get out of the midday sun, the crew going back to their work.

Jude finally rose to his feet, his face just as red if not more than the unfortunate sailor. Alvin turned to face him, grinning triumphantly. "Well, that was easy."

The comment earned him a punch in the gut, causing Alvin to double over. Jude was all but glaring at him, blushing from ear to ear. "Really, _that's_ the excuse you give him?"

Alvin coughed, rubbing his stomach ruefully. "H-hey, it worked, didn't it? Not like I could tell him the truth."

There were so many things Jude wanted to say on that matter, but in the end he merely sputtered aimlessly, fighting for composure. Really, why did he have to make it about _that_ of all things?

It was as if Alvin sensed his struggling, and decided to try and change the subject. "Jeez, you really can punch, can't you? Maybe you didn't need a bodyguard after all."

There was a pause in his sputtering, but his face remained beet red. He played with a strand of hair, hugging his free arm around his middle. "Maybe I should work on that more. I haven't had as much time to train since coming to Elympios…"

A hand was clapped on his shoulder, pulling Jude's attention back to Alvin. "Yeah, when this is all over you should work on it. You've got the skill; just have to get back into practice."

Jude nodded, feeling a little more at ease. He pulled away from Alvin and came to stand at the railing, watching as the land disappeared more with each passing minute.

 _Goodbye, Elympios. I'll keep my promise to you, I swear._

Jude had never been to Xian Du before. He had met people from Xian Du; their medicine sellers often came through Fennmont to sell their wares to the hospital, but he had never actually visited himself. He knew that many tribes had congregated there at one point, and that the current king of Rieze Maxia had claimed his fame in the Coliseum, but the bare bones information did little to prepare him for the next leg of their trip.

It was well into the night when they made it to land, and while being out of Elympios meant they were out of immediate danger; Alvin insisted they keep moving until they reached their destination. Spirius may give up the chase past the border, but Exodus was everywhere. They needed solid walls and crowds to hide behind until they could reach the capital city.

The distance between Lakutam and Xian Du had to be covered on foot. It wouldn't be a terrible walk if it was flat like the commute he had to make from Trigleph to Helioborg before the ferry was put in. But this trek was almost entirely uphill, and while Jude considered himself in fairly good physical shape, his energy was quickly waning.

He wouldn't let that on, no, he didn't dare. If what Alvin said was true then they weren't safe, not until they made it to Xian Du.

It was this thought that kept him moving, the gravel and dried grass crunching beneath his feet, echoing off the rocky outcroppings. As they neared the crest of the hill Jude could see the lights of the coliseum in the distance, hear the roar of the crowd from late night battles of which the city was so famous.

"C'mon." Alvin urged, wrapping an arm around Jude's shoulder to encourage him to keep the pace. "We just have to meet with our contact and then we can rest."

 _So he knows…_ Not like it wasn't obvious, but Jude had hoped his exhaustion would be better hidden in the darkness. As usual, Alvin's intuition was spot on. That, or Jude was completely oblivious.

The streets of Xian Du were crowded with pedestrians. The bazaar remained open in spite of the late hour, merchants peddling curious wares to locals and tourists alike. There were even beasts in cages being displayed, some tame, some not. It was truly a bizarre town to be in, and a perfect place to hide in the shadows.

They ended up at a bar near the center of the city. Alvin pulled Jude inside, squeezing through a crowd of rowdy patrons clacking their mugs together and congratulating each other. A victory party?

"Alvin!"

At the bar was yet another one of Alvin's contacts, but this time a familiar one. Jude was tugged towards the counter where Yurgen greeted them with a brief bow and a warm smile. "I was curious when you'd arrive. Got yourself in a bind again, I see."

"Well, you know how it goes. Piss someone off, leave the country for a while."

 _That's an understatement…_ Jude groused internally, absently rubbing at his eyes. It was easy to stay up for a day or two straight if he was sitting down and reading, less so when traveling across the globe to escape a terrorist organization.

It would seem that Yurgen picked up on his foul mood and offered a hand. "It's good to see you again, Jude. Are you doing all right?"

Jude stared at the hand a moment before shaking it, smiling tiredly up at Yurgen. "It's good to see you, too, Yurgen." He chuckled, tucking a hand behind his head. This was the second time he had met Yurgen, and both times had been at a bar. Jude wondered if that impacted the man's perception of him. "I've been better, honestly, but…" He paused, looking to Alvin for guidance. How much did Yurgen know about what happened?

Alvin braced his hands against Jude's shoulders from behind, leaning over him with a cheesy grin. "Jude here has an audience with the king. Got some important business to discuss." His eyes met Jude's and he winked. "Isn't that right?"

The boy nodded dumbly. Alvin really did have everything planned.

"With the king? That's quite impressive!" Yurgen's praise only seemed to fluster Jude. He could offer no retort other than a silent nod, all wit having escaped him with the lack of sleep.

Thankfully, Alvin was willing to do the talking. "Yep, Judy here is important, so make sure we get there safely all right, Yurgen?"

Now it was Jude's turn to speak up. He knew there was a reason Alvin had wanted to meet with Yurgen, but up until now he wasn't sure what that reason was. "You're taking us to Kanbalar?" He asked, catching Yurgen's attention.

The tan man blinked in surprise, then smiled gently. It made Jude feel safer just seeing it. "Not quite. My tribe is one of the few that can train and command flying beasts called wyverns. This time of year, it's the only way to make it through the mountains surrounding Kanbalar without braving the caverns."

Alvin nodded, his hair tickling Jude's ear. "Yurgen got permission to lend us one, and that's why we walked all the way to Xian Du."

It made sense, and once again Jude was blown away by Alvin's ability to have every step planned. That, and how he managed to know all these people that could help them. Connections didn't even begin to describe it. Alvin seemed to have an entire network of people that he could rely on in tough times.

Absently, Jude wondered if he was one of those people.

"Well, it was more that your letter reached them before me, but I was willing to comply if it was to help a friend." The older man gave a nod, glancing worriedly at Jude. "You guys walked all the way here, right?" Yurgen turned to address Alvin directly, face serious. "I'll have the others prep the wyverns, but you'll have to wait until morning to fly out."

Once again his gaze fell to Jude, the worry clear in his eyes. It reminded him of all those times Alvin would watch him, wanting to say how awful he looked, how tired he must have been, but refraining in favor of silently fretting for the boy's well-being. "Do you two have a place to stay for the night?"

Again, Alvin answered for them. "We're going to Mom's place."

 _Mom?_

"Oh, I see. Well, if you need anything, you know where to find me."

 _Alvin's mom?_

"Right, we'll catch you in the morning, Yurgen. And thanks again."

Jude was led from the bar and into the streets again, trying to absorb the information he was given and finding it difficult with his sleep-deprived mind. Alvin's mother lived in Xian Du. He hadn't mentioned her in all the time they had spent together. Hell, Alvin hardly spoke of his family at all, save for Balan, and even then he avoided talking about their shared childhood. Jude knew he had someone in Exodus related to him, but nothing of his mother.

The two walked through the dimly lit streets towards the residential district, taking a lift to a small home tucked away off the main drag. Alvin rifled through his pockets and procured a small key, shoving it into the old locks and pushing the door open. He didn't bother to knock, didn't announce his presence to the darkened room. Instead he walked to one end of the small home, striking a match and lighting a candle.

 _No mana lamps?_ Jude thought it strange for the home to be missing such a common fixture. But then again, if it was Alvin's mother, she would have been Elympion and lacked the ability to use one. He surveyed the room, seeking out the woman in the darkness, only to be met with a well-furnished but otherwise empty room.

"This is… Your mother's home?" Jude asked tentatively, noting the tension in Alvin's shoulders, how he didn't turn his way when he spoke.

"Yeah, she lived here for about ten years, actually. Yurgen's fiancé, Isla… She was taking care of her."

 _Taking care of her…_ "Is she sick?"

Alvin nodded, walking across the room to take a seat at the desk where several letters were scattered. Jude followed, peering over the man's shoulders, noting the writing on each. Neat script, undoubtedly Alvin's, but the name signed was different.

"My father died in a ship accident when I was a kid. Only a few of us survived. Mom… was never the same after that." It was the most Alvin had talked about himself since Jude had known him. Alvin was always about the present, never wanting to bring up where he was even months before he and Jude met. It was painful to admit, but he knew little about the man. He didn't know about his parents, his childhood, how he grew up and what he had been doing up until their fated meeting that day in Helioborg.

One of the letters was held up, Jude taking it in hand. "My mom had dementia. The doctors in Elympios said there was no helping her, that it was only a matter of time. I brought her here so she could live peacefully, and away from anyone who would want to harm her."

Jude started to ask who wanted to harm Alvin's mother when something on the letter caught his eye.

" _Everyone is doing just fine. Alfred found a stray cat that he decided to take care of. He even gave it a name; Jude. He's really become attached to the little one. He knows he can't keep it at school, but he's determined to watch over it until it's grown."_

A cat named Jude, a letter to Alvin's mother written as another…

"Near the end, she didn't remember who I was." Alvin gently tugged he letter back, adding it to the small pile on the desk. "She thought I was my father; that her 'little Alfred' was still at boarding school eagerly awaiting his summer break so he could visit."

Near the end… Suddenly it dawned on Jude.

"…When did she pass?" He asked quietly, placing a comforting hand upon Alvin's stiff shoulder.

"…The day your apartment got broken into, Isla called to tell me the news."

 _So recent? Why didn't he say anything?_ But then Jude remembered what had been going on the days following the break-in; the impromptu move from his apartment to Alvin's, Jude's destructive spiral into his research, their brief fight… Jude had been so far gone in his own depression that he was utterly oblivious to Alvin's own struggle. If he had been in his right mind, would he have noticed? If Alvin thought Jude more trustworthy, would he have confided in him about his mother's condition, her untimely passing?

Jude felt at a loss for words. All this time, he had been so hung up on his own problems that he had completely ignored Alvin's declining emotions. He felt a familiar guilt borne from his childish selfishness that left him blind to the feelings of others.

"Alvin…" Jude gave his shoulder a squeeze. "I'm so sorry…"

The hand was gently brushed away, Alvin slowly rising to his feet. "Don't be." He muttered, coming to stand before the vacant bed, photos of himself, his family, pinned upon the wall near the headboard. "After the accident, my mother and I were cut off from the family's funding. Apparently our stake in it had been removed; she wasn't part of the Svent line, and I was too young to have any hold on it." Alvin took a seat upon the old straw mattress, head hung low, defeated. "The leaders of Exodus approached me for work. They'd give me odd jobs; working in the house of other lords to gather information, sneaking into secret military compounds to steal Rashugal's secrets… I got older, the jobs got more dangerous, until I was working as a full-fledged mercenary traveling the world."

Alvin paused, scrubbing at his face with what could only be frustration. "But Mom only got sicker, and _they_ knew that, and I always thought that there was no way to break the cycle I've been stuck in since I was six goddamn years old."

"Alvin…" In spite of the distance Alvin seemed to try to put between them, Jude took a seat beside him on the bed. "I'm sorry. If I had known, I…"

A hand was held up to silence Jude, Alvin finally looking his way. "I said _don't_. My mom…" He sighed, eyes returning to the floor. "She was suffering, had been suffering for a long time. I did a lot of shitty things to support her, thinking that it was good enough just to funnel gald into her account when I should have just stayed at her side." Alvin buried his face in his hand, shoulders shaking, breath coming in short, quiet gasps. He was trying so hard not to break down, but they both saw it coming and neither knew if it could be stopped.

"But I can't even claim such an altruistic purpose for my actions. I _wanted_ to live as a mercenary, using my skills to earn money without any regard for others. I wanted to live without any ties, to be free to do whatever I wanted with no consequences. And for what? So my mother would die alone while her useless son lined his pockets with gald?" He shuddered, raking his hands through his hair before ducking his head again. "What the hell am I supposed to do now?" He asked, voice quiet, broken. Shame, that must have been what Alvin felt over his mother's death. Shame and guilt brought on by a life he perceived as the easiest way out, only to wind up hurting those he loved.

Slim arms were wrapped around the man's shoulders, Jude pulling him into a tight embrace. Alvin remained stiff at first, but after a moment he relaxed into the hug, resting his head against the smaller boy's shoulders. Jude knew he couldn't do anything to bring Alvin's mother back, or even to fix all the things that had gone wrong in his life. But this, holding him close, comforting him like Alvin had done for him so many times before… This he could do.

Alvin took another calculated breath, as if doing everything he could to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. "I want out, Jude." He admitted, hand reaching up to grip the back of Jude's shirt. "He always told me that if I followed orders, she'd be safe, I'd be safe. I could continue to live freely but…" He shook his head, hand fisting in the fabric on Jude's back. "What's the point if I can't even keep one person I care about safe? What good is it when the people I care about are used against me for _his_ gain?" The question ended with a soft patter of warmth on Jude's shoulders, the beginnings of tears Alvin was unable to hold back anymore.

One had to wonder, was it his mother Alvin spoke of, or Jude himself? Had the man felt guilty for lying to him all this time for the sake of Exodus's will? Perhaps this was the reason Jude had been seeking; why he was spared, why Alvin was going through all this trouble to distance himself from Exodus. He wanted to run, and Jude was along for the ride.

Somehow that made it so much easier to trust him again.

"It's all right, Alvin." Jude murmured into his hair, hands rubbing slow circles into Alvin's back. "What matters now is that you're trying to get out, right? You're trying to keep moving, even though your drive is gone…"

Alvin didn't respond, just sat there silently while he attempted to recompose himself. They stayed like that for a time, Jude holding the older man much like Alvin had for him when he felt like the world was caving in on him. Alvin had been there for him even when his own world was crashing down, as if he could hold up the collapse with his broad shoulders, shelter Jude from the wreckage borne from his selfish desires.

Now it was Jude's turn to shelter him.

After several long moments of haggard breathing and soft whispers of encouragement, Alvin finally pulled away, face flushed and eyes puffy. He coughed to clear his throat, clearly embarrassed by his moment of weakness. "Sorry. I really didn't want you to see me like that." He muttered, scrubbing at his face with a groan. "Man, being around you has made me one hell of a softie. What will the cool kids think of me now?"

Jude chuckled, reaching over to smooth Alvin's hair from his face. "Even the cool kids get upset sometimes, right? And I don't think any less of you for it."

In the flickering candlelight, he saw Alvin smile, and things between them felt just a little bit lighter.

With a soft sigh, Jude leaned heavily against his shoulder, allowing himself to finally relax. "We… Should really sleep. I think those hours we agreed upon were up a while ago."

Alvin snorted at that, reaching up to ruffle Jude's hair. "You're right. We have to catch an early flight, don't we?"

Jude hummed a response, already falling asleep. Just being next to Alvin was comfortable enough.

Alvin toed off his shoes and took a spot on the straw mattress near the wall, patting the space next to him. "It's small but it's better than camping."

It was a little strange sleeping in the bed that Alvin's late mother had laid in, but at that point he didn't care, so exhausted was he. That night they shared the only bed in the house, packed tightly together for lack of space. But even with Alvin's back pressed uncomfortably against his, it's the best sleep Jude's had in recent memory. He liked to think Alvin slept well, too.


	13. Chapter 13

"Alvin, are you _sure_ you can control this thing?"

Jude's voice was just barely audible over the roar of the wind and snow that pelted them as they flew over the mountains surrounding Kanbalar. He clung close, arms wrapped firmly around Alvin's waist as they soared through the clouds on the back of the wyvern.

"Why? You wanna try?" Alvin called back with a laugh. He seemed to be handling the beast with only minor trouble, which Yurgen had told them to expect. Unless you were part of their tribe, the wyverns were likely to misbehave out of defiance. Thankfully this was not Alvin's first flight, and much to Jude's relief they had not been tossed off the saddle and sent tumbling towards the jagged mountains below.

Not yet, anyway.

The wyvern bucked in mid-air and took a sudden dive through the grey storm clouds. Jude yelped and gripped Alvin's waist even tighter, squeezing his eyes shut as he awaited the inevitable impact with the ground. Yet the wyvern leveled out moments later, the snow-capped mountains now whizzing by beneath their feet.

Alvin took one hand from the reigns and placed it over Jude's, giving him a comforting pat. "Look, you can see Kanbalar."

Jude leaned to the left, spotting the capital city in the distance. Admittedly, Jude knew very little of the area, and in relation, the new king. He had grown up in what was formerly the Kingdom of Rashugal, ruled by King Nachtigal. The late king was the primary supporter of the open-border treaty, insisting that it was high-time for Rieze Maxia to move forward into the technological age. "For the greater good of all in this world", he had said in a rousing speech to his subjects. It was almost entirely thanks to him that the treaty was passed, and the process of building new relations with their neighbor country truly began.

Sadly, he did not live to see his work come to fruition, passing suddenly a mere months before the border was officially open. Rumors attributed his death to those against the merging of the worlds, some even pointing the finger to the ruler of the neighboring kingdom. With Nachtigal gone and no clear heir named, the council announced that the two kingdoms would merge into one, acting as the United Kingdom of Rieze Maxia under the rule of Kanbalar's king, Gaius.

The ruler of Kanbalar had repeatedly voiced his disdain for assisting the Elympion "degenerates", stating that their continued isolation was the only thing saving them from meeting the same fate as the dying country. But it would seem that the people's opinions far outweighed his own, and being a man purportedly of his people, King Gaius ultimately continued with the treaty.

Knowing this, Jude felt a wave of anxiety at the idea of presenting his findings to the king. The information he had to offer would only paint the Elympion people in the very light that almost undid the treaty before it began. Would the king use his findings as justification to nullify the treaty, closing the border once again? If that were to happen, they really would have no hope of stopping Exodus _or_ helping Elympios. The fate of both worlds fell squarely onto his shoulders and Jude wasn't sure if he could handle the pressure.

The pressure, and the cold. It was unreasonably cold. He really wished Alvin had given him a coat to go with his new attire. Goosebumps rose on his exposed arms, his body wracked with shivers as the frigid air rushed around them. It was a wonder he hadn't developed frostbite from exposure alone. Alvin wasn't dressed much more conservatively than he was; wasn't he freezing as well?

Jude would receive no reprieve from the cold as they came in for a landing before the castle gates, snow sent flying by the flapping of the wyvern's powerful wings. The guards posted at the entry stepped back, allowing the beast the wide girth it required to properly land. The beast gave a non-committal growl before lowering its head, allowing its passengers to dismount. Alvin first, then Jude stiffly behind him.

Within seconds the guards approached, putting Jude on edge. "State your business." They ordered, pikes at the ready, only serving to rile him up more. Jude had had just about enough of hostile guards threatening him.

Thankfully, Alvin was there to step between them. "Whoa, easy there. We're expected."

"And whom is expecting you, Elympion?" The pike was turned on Alvin, the man throwing his hands up in defense. Were the people of Kanbalar just as distrustful of Elympions as their king?

Alvin looked over his shoulder at Jude, casting him an apologetic smile before returning his attentions to the guard. "I'm here to see King Gaius. This kid is requesting an audience."

"The king does not accept audiences unless a request is formally submitted in writing to the Prime Minister. No exceptions!"

"Of course…" Alvin grit his teeth, briefly glancing around before fixating on one corner of the stone wall surrounding the city. He frowned, hands still raised as he called out. "Are you just gonna watch me flounder or are you gonna help me out here?"

A blur of blue and black flicked across Jude's vision, a figure darting from above and landing before them, further startling the guard. Blonde hair, skin-tight attire, definitively female in form. She pushed up her glasses as she silently regarded Alvin before addressing the guards with a wave of her hand. "Let them pass." Her voice was decadent, sultry in her command. The guards obeyed without a single vote of protest, signaling to open the gate for the three to enter.

The three were escorted into the city proper, the gates clattering closed behind them. At the head of their group, the woman said nothing as she lead them further into the snow-covered streets, Alvin sticking close to Jude's side. He appeared tense, yet contemplative as he watched the woman almost _saunter_ along the path, silently leading them further into the city.

All the while Jude observed his surroundings, taking in the architecture of the capital city. It was strange to think that this place was now considered one of the most important areas of Rieze Maxia. Until recently, Fennmont had held that title, with a majority of Rashugal's trade being funneled through the military base, making it the first stop for anyone wishing to make their mark within the country. But with the passing of King Nachtigal and the uniting of the two kingdoms, the capital city shifted to this remote, mountainous region.

Strategically it made sense; Fennmont was near the coast and easily accessible to allies and enemies alike. Kanbalar, on the other hand, was surrounded on three sides with treacherous mountains, and one with a monster-infested marsh. It was clear why the trade mecca remained in Xian Du when you considered how difficult it was to actually _reach_ the castled city.

They came upon a secluded courtyard outside what appeared to be an old chapel. No townspeople were around, all presumably hiding within their homes to avoid the bitter cold that befell the city nearly year round. Alone, or at least as alone as they could be in the open, Presa finally turned on Alvin, wasting no time in laying into him.

" _Four years_ , Al." She seethed, grabbing ahold of the man's prized scarf as if threatening to hang him by it. "Four years, and the first time you call me is for a _favor_?"

Alvin grimaced, hands coming up to grab ahold of the scarf knot out of self-preservation. "Easy, Presa! No need to take my head off!"

"You're fortunate if that is all that is done to you within these walls. Do you have any idea what _hell_ you put us through when you left? The fact that you'd have the _audacity_ to call on me for help is so completely beyond me that I have half a mind to throw you into the dungeon to see how _you_ like it."

"Can you throw us somewhere _warm_ instead? Jude's freezing out here." Both looked to Jude, who had been watching with a mixture of fear and intrigue while the woman chewed Alvin out. _So this is Presa…_

Presa huffed, smirking Jude's way. "Oh, so _this_ is the one?" She hummed, letting go of Alvin's scarf and ambling over to Jude, grinning. "The studious researcher gone rogue for the sake of his mission, is that it, Jude Mathis?" She spoke softly like a secret, the air of familiarity completely bewildering Jude. Did she know him? Had he met her?

A single finger brushed along the underside of Jude's chin, Presa leaning closer, expression almost predatory. "You came all this way thinking you could simply walk in and plead your case with the King, is that what Alvin told you?"

Jude nodded, feeling the woman's eyes on him. It felt as if she were seeing right through, completely exposing his innermost fears to the world. It was unnerving, yet strangely familiar. "Yes, it's imperative that I speak with the king right away and-"

"He isn't here." She cut him short, pulling back and meandering over to Alvin like a defiant cat. "Stepped out to take care of business. Urgent, he said."

"What?" They had come all this way and the king wasn't there? Hadn't Alvin made arrangements for a meeting as soon as they arrived? "When will he return?"

Presa took an express interest in her nails, hips canted to one side. "By the morrow, I imagine. It's not like you can expect him to clear his schedule for a simple researcher and a spy."

"I… I didn't expect him to, but…" Jude looked to Alvin for guidance, but the man only shrugged, shaking his head. It would seem even his connections only went so far, and they were reaching the extent of his abilities.

The woman adjusted her glasses with a soft hum and once again Jude felt like he was being dissected by those eyes. Such a peculiar woman, and yet he felt as if he had seen her before at one point. But where?

"So, this is your new toy, Al? Your tastes certainly _have_ changed…"

Jude took a half-step back, face lighting up with a heavy blush. "T-toy? I-I'm not…"

"Oh? Is that not the case?" Presa cooed, only serving to make Jude blush more.

"Presa." Alvin warned, a firm hand on her shoulder. "Give it a rest. You're giving him ideas."

The woman chuckled, brushing Alvin's hand off before crossing her arms over her voluptuous chest. "Ideas he says…" She observed Jude a moment longer, seemingly amused by the heavy blush that was creeping down his neck. Instead of pushing the teasing further, she simply smiled. "I am Presa of the Chimeriad employed by King Gaius."

The Chimeriad… Jude had only heard of them in passing. They were said to be an unstoppable elite group of fighters that served as the king's personal guard. If this woman was part of such a group, then perhaps Alvin's connections went further than he originally thought.

Remembering his etiquette, Jude quickly bowed his head. "I'm Jude Mathis, a researcher from Leronde currently working in Trigleph. Thank you for allowing us into Kanbalar."

Presa all but giggled at his posture, bringing a hand up to cover her lips. "My, where did you find this one, Al? I didn't think cradle-robbing was part of your ledger."

" _Presa_ ," Again with that warning tone. "Leave it alone."

"You're Rieze Maxian, are you not? How did you get mixed up with this man of all people?"

Jude lifted his head slightly, still feeling unsettled by the woman's devouring gaze. "He is…" He caught himself. "… _was_ my bodyguard."

The woman seemed intrigued by that. Had she not known? Or was it Jude's reaction that piqued her interest? "You've a demon's luck to be stuck with this man as a bodyguard…" She quipped, each word accentuated with a little sway of her hips, as if mocking the man that stood behind her. It was clear that Presa held an almost unhealthy amount of disdain for Alvin, but for what reason, Jude did not know.

But if she was close to Alvin once, he wanted to know. In a brief flicker of courage, he stood up fully, putting on a brave face as he spoke. "Did you two work together before, Presa?"

Her expression darkened considerably, but the smug grin remained. Presa glanced over her shoulder, one hand on her hip as she regarded the man in question. "Oh, you didn't tell him?" She purred, earning a glare from Alvin. The man opened his mouth as if to cut her off, but Presa beat him to it. "We were engaged."

 _Oh._

The proverbial can of worms opened and more questions began spilling out. This woman was Alvin's fiancé? But she had used past tense, so they were not engaged any longer? What could have happened between them that caused such tension that they did not speak for four years?

Many questions arose, but Jude knew he would be denied answers for now. Alvin stepped between them in what Jude assumed was an attempt to reroute the conversation to something less damaging. "Presa, get down to business already."

"Oh? Don't want him to know our history, Al?"

What was she implying? Jude wasn't sure he wanted to know. In fact, he wasn't sure he wanted to know much about this woman at all. She seemed close to Alvin, or at least close at one time. What happened between them Jude wasn't sure, and it appeared Alvin wasn't keen on him finding out.

All he knew was that she was dangerous, probably just as dangerous as Alvin, if not more.

Seemingly having had her fill of Jude blushing, Presa turned to face Alvin, expression becoming serious. "You'll be barred access to the castle until Rowen or Gaius returns. Until then, you'll stay at the inn."

"As long as it has a fireplace, I don't really care." Alvin quipped, rounding the woman to stand by Jude's side, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. A protective gesture, or simply an attempt at keeping Jude warm? He'd opt for either at that point.

Presa said little as she led them down the streets of Kanbalar again, heading towards the solitary inn within the city's walls. Alvin kept him close, providing a welcome reprieve from the biting cold that seeped into his skin, making him hyperaware of each and every inch of exposed flesh. What he wouldn't give for the wool coat he had left behind in Trigleph.

The group came to a halt before the stone walls of the inn, Presa turning on heel to address the two. "I will report of your arrival. Once the king has agreed to the audience, you will be sent for."

 _Once he agrees to it?_ "But I thought that king was expecting us?" Jude queried, suddenly concerned that they had gone all that way for nothing. Hadn't Alvin made these arrangements already?

Presa crossed her arms with a sardonic grin, as if to comment on how naïve Jude was. "My, aren't we idealistic? With what little information Alvin was able to provide over the phone, it's a wonder that he's even considering hearing your case at all." Her gaze turned to Alvin, who only grimaced in response. She was teasing him, and they both knew it. "He will see you in due time. Until then, you will have to wait like a good boy." Presa cast a suggesting wink Jude's way, only serving to fluster the boy further. Really, what was she getting at?

"Don't heckle the kid." Alvin groused, voice stern. "He's been through a lot recently."

Presa rolled her eyes in response, canting her hips to one side. "I imagine much of that is because of you, Al."

Alvin didn't deny it.

A brief pause, then Presa's attention was on Jude again. She leaned close, voice low, but there was no play in her tone. "I'd do yourself a favor, boy. Part ways with that man as soon as you can. He'll only hurt you in the end."

The woman disappeared into the shadows as quickly as she had appeared, leaving Jude feeling vulnerable, bewildered. He couldn't shake the feeling that Presa knew him in some way, and not just from what little she had gained from the brief conversation with Alvin just a few days prior. Moreover, she seemed to know Alvin far better than he did, and held secrets that the man dare not share himself. Just how close was this woman to Alvin, and how much of his dark past would she be willing to divulge?

Jude made a mental note to ask later, but for now, he just wanted to get warm.

The room was about as cozy as one would expect of a rustic mountain town. Two beds lined with furs, thick curtains covering the windows as another round of snow began to fall just outside. A hearth nestled into the interior wall, a fire already crackling merrily within, warming the room. The door was closed behind them, finally affording some semblance of safety and privacy for Jude. They were out of the woods for now, safe within Kanbalar's walls, for however long that would be.

"I'll call one of the maids to run a bath." Alvin volunteered. "Why don't you go sit by the hearth and warm up? Your lips are turning blue." He stepped into the hallway, leaving Jude to his own devices.

Jude quickly made himself comfortable in front of the fire, taking a seat upon one of the fur rugs. Never before had he been more thankful for something so simple as a fireplace, relishing the feeling of his limbs slowly coming back online with pinpricks of a thousand tiny needles.

Alvin returned a moment later, taking a seat next to Jude by the fire, pulling off his coat and tossing it upon the bed. "Maid's working on your bath now. Shouldn't be too long."

"Thanks." Jude said quietly, holding his hands close to the flames. Having Alvin next to him again brought his mind back to the questions that had arisen during their short time with Presa. As much as Jude wanted to offer Alvin the luxury of privacy on the matter, too much had happened over the last few days for him to allow such secrets. That, and some of what Presa had said was… troubling.

"You were engaged?" Jude asked, hoping he wouldn't regret his decision to dig further.

Alvin sighed audibly, resting propping his elbow upon his raised knee. "Yeah, we were."

A pause ensued, Jude waiting for him, expecting more than just a frivolous response.

The other seemed to pick up on this and after a moment of silence, continued. "We were going to get married, but her orders conflicted with mine and I had to break it off."

"Orders?" Curious. Orders from the king? Or someone else?

Alvin nodded, staring into the flames, as if unwilling to look at Jude while he confessed. "At the time she was gathering intel working at the hospital. I just happened to be working for the Rashugal military, and… One thing led to another."

"Wait, working at the hospital?" Suddenly the woman's familiarity with him was explained, and Jude realized all at once that he _did_ know Presa. The secretary, the one that always seemed to give him furtive winks whenever he'd drop off files at the nurse's station. What was her name? Mouse? No, Mink. Mink, that was her name. Jude kicked himself for not realizing sooner; it had been a few years, but he should have been able to recognize her even without the typical employee uniform.

"Sounds like you've already figured it out." Alvin chuckled, laying his head against his outstretched arm, expression forlorn. "I ended up turning her in to the military. I'd like to say it was an act of self-preservation; she was feeding info on me and my troops to her employer. But…" He gave a half-hearted shrug. Alvin didn't have to say it out loud; he knew the reason why. It was another job, just like this one. The heads go to the highest bidder, and it just so happened that the sack of coin he received outweighed his feelings for Presa.

"Did you love her?" Jude asked, but did he really want to know? Did he want to hear what Alvin had to say about this woman he had intended to marry and had ultimately left behind?

A beat of silence, then Alvin answered. "Yeah. I loved her. But I had orders."

Jude's stomach tied itself up in knots as he realized how painfully similar Presa's story was to his own. Perhaps the exchange of vows was not involved in their retelling, but the closeness, the emotions, the inevitable betrayal… "So your orders override your personal ties… Is that why you cut her off?"

Another beat of silence, then a nod. Alvin seemed to be struggling with something within himself, but at that point, Jude wasn't entirely sure he wanted that fight explained. "That's right. It was better that way."

The tension was nearly tangible between them, Jude's thoughts almost loud enough for the other to hear. All this, the appearance of the long lost fiancé, the allusions to his own relationship with Alvin, and Presa's words…

"Was she your toy?"

"What?"

Jude felt his face grow hot, and it wasn't because of the fire. "Presa asked if I was your new 'toy'. That would imply that you've had them before, right?"

Alvin audibly groaned and scrubbed at his face. "That's… Damn that Presa, putting ideas in your head…"

"Alvin." Jude tugged at Alvin's wrist, bringing the man's attention back to him. "What did she mean by that?"

Alvin paused, staring sidelong at the young boy for a second before answering in the most deadpan voice he could muster. "She means if we're sleeping together."

Oh.

 _Oh._

Jude's face lit up a brilliant pink and he was suddenly very sorry he asked. Did they really give off that impression? Yes, he had definitely had a crush on the man, and before all the chaos started he was definitely considering asking him about a relationship. But right now there was so much more going on that needed his full attention. And even if there wasn't, they hadn't even made it past _holding hands_ , let alone actually…

His nose was flicked by Alvin and Jude was abruptly brought from his thoughts and back to reality. "Stop thinking about it so much." Alvin stated curtly before rising to his feet. "When this is all over, you won't have to see me again."

Alvin's words hung in the air as he exited into the hallway, no doubt checking on the status of their baths. Yet Jude wished he had stayed if only to get something of an explanation from the about his last statement.

 _You won't have to see me again_ …

"But… What if I don't want that?" Jude asked the empty room, and was grateful for the lack of answer he received.


	14. Chapter 14

The Palace of Kanbalar was huge and imposing, just as one would imagine it to be. Walking through those massive gates into the foyer made Jude feel small and anxious, and though Alvin was at his side, his presence did little to settle the nerves. It reminded him of his first day at Talim, the feeling of insignificance while standing in the presence of doctors and researchers so great he was sure he would never be able to look them in the eye. Except in this case, the person he was to meet was not an esteemed researcher in the medical field, but the king of all of Rieze Maxia.

And instead of secretaries and students, he was surrounded by guards and servants, all with eyes on him.

Instinctively Jude clutched at his shirt pocket, feeling the disc still safely tucked away. Any moment now and he'd be standing before the king, explaining his findings. His fate, his _home's_ fate, hung on whether he could convince the king to listen to their cause. Again the nagging voice in his head iterated that he was just a young boy, that the king had no real reason to consider his words.

Perhaps if he had grown up in Auj Oule he would not be so nervous; King Gaius was hailed as a hero in this land, much like King Nachtigal had been back home. If Jude had been called before the courts in Rashugal, he'd be nervous still, but honored that he could meet such a prolific figure. Nachtigal was known as a kind and just man, but Gaius… He knew nothing about him save that he won his position through battle. Jude wasn't even sure what he looked like, let alone what to expect personality-wise.

The lack of preparation was wearing on his nerves more than he liked to admit. It felt like forever since they were called to the palace to finally meet with the king, yet they were still standing in the foyer waiting, with Jude worrying over his words. He had already gone over his pre-prepared speech a dozen times in his head with different outcomes, some good, most bad. Was it really right to be so fearful of the king? Was he not considered a benevolent ruler?

"Stop thinking so much." Alvin commented, bringing him out of his thoughts and back to reality. In spite of Jude's own unease, Alvin seemed the picturesque of calm, even if his expression was already bleak.

"Then why don't you tell me what you're thinking?" Jude countered, ceasing his fidgeting and instead turning his focus on Alvin. "This isn't your first time meeting the king, is it?"

Alvin quirked a brow at his accusation, but chuckled all the same. "You figured me out. Yeah, I worked for him at one time."

"You _worked_ for him?" That much was a surprise, and yet after he gave it some thought, it shouldn't have been. Alvin had been working for Exodus while being contracted to Rashugal, and apparently the same went for Spirius. How long had Alvin been playing multiple sides like that? But strategically, it made sense. What better way to gather information than to gain it from a source on the inside? Then again, that had apparently gone sour before, hence Presa's overall opinion of Alvin. Was it even a good idea to bring him along for this?

"Don't get all bent out of shape about it." Alvin shrugged off Jude's shock and attempted to set the story straight. "I didn't do anything bad, just gathered some intel that he needed. Not every mission I've had ended in broken hearts."

"Or murder?" Jude asked, still leery.

A low blow, and its effect was clearly displayed on Alvin's face. "Will you cut me some slack? I got us here safe and sound, didn't I?"

He had, to an extent, and yet Jude still felt embittered by Alvin's actions. He had thought he was doing better after that night in Xian Du, after hearing Alvin's motives for keeping up with Exodus and the admission of his faults. But Presa's words still hung in the air; about being hurt, being led on, then abandoned by Alvin. And then there was Alvin's statement from the night before, how he intended to leave once this was all resolved; perhaps that was what put Jude in such a foul mood while waiting for the king.

But was that really fair to Alvin? He had his reasons, right?

 _Or are you just running, Alvin?_ Jude wanted to ask, but let it drop. It wasn't like him to be so malicious about things. Didn't he tell himself that he'd give Alvin another chance after hearing his story back in Xian Du? Besides, it wouldn't do either of them any good to hold this over the Alvin's head right now. They had more important things to worry about.

With a sigh, Jude shook his head, casting a remorseful look Alvin's way. "I'm sorry. I guess I really am nervous about meeting the king…"

Instead of Alvin giving Jude any flack for his worries, he simply draped an arm around his shoulders, giving him a quick squeeze. "Hey, don't sweat it, okay? Yeah, he's bit on the severe side, but Gaius is a good man."

"You act as if you know him personally."

"You'd be surprised…"

Before Jude could ask about his cryptic remark, a guard approached them. Standing at attention, he spoke quick and stern. "His Majesty King Gaius will see you now. Do not waste his time." The guard warned, and Jude wondered if this was the same pikeman that they ran into at the city's gates for how bitter he was towards him.

It mattered little. The moment they were waiting for had finally arrived.

Alvin remained at his side as they entered the throne room; a long walkway decorated in red and gold over stone. Jude spotted Presa first, standing with arms crossed next to the throne. Three others assumed to be the remaining members of the Chimeriad were along with her; two men and a young woman, all watching him in an almost adjudicating manner as he approached.

And at the center was the king; dark skin and hair, elaborate red and gold robes, a stony gaze that pierced Jude's very being.

Jude remembered that gaze, that _face_ …

"You are…!" He stopped himself before he blurted it out. _That night at Film Noir, with Ludger!_

The familiarity seemed to go both ways, but Gaius did not act on it the same that Jude did. Instead, he merely cleared his throat and spoke. "And who is it that has come before me?"

Presa stepped forward, adjusting her glasses, as if she too had not anticipated Jude's reaction. "Presenting Jude Mathis of Leronde, and Alvin Svent of Trigleph."

"An odd pair to stand before me." Gaius eyed Alvin momentarily, whom gave him a casual wave that earned Alvin a quirked brow. His attention returned to Jude, addressing him with all the grandeur one would expect of an esteemed ruler. "Word has reached my ears that you have obtained information that is vital to the livelihood of my people."

Jude took a slow breath before stepping forward, holding his head high to feign confidence. "Yes, your majesty." He didn't want to think that his voice was shaking, but Jude was sure it was, if only minutely. "I am a researcher currently stationed at the Helioborg base in Elympios. My team and I have been working on developing a renewable energy source that would no longer compromise the livelihood of spirits."

"A noble cause to assist their kind in righting their wrongs." Just as Jude feared, the king's opinion on the Elympion's choices was not positive. This may not end well, he realized with a sinking feeling.

"I…" Jude paused and glanced to Alvin, as if asking for reassurance. "We have reason to believe that a faction within Elympios is intending to use a weapon against Rieze Maxia."

The king's expression became decidedly sour, and suddenly he did not look so benevolent as he did before. "…Go on."

With the king and the Chimeriad watching, Jude told his story. He explained how Professor Haus and he had been working on a solution to the energy crisis, the professor's untimely death at the hands of Exodus. Jude regaled being pursued by Exodus at every turn, tormented in hopes of speeding his work along. The parts with Alvin holding a gun to his head were skillfully glanced over for the mercenary's sake, but Jude was sure to explain in great detail his findings from the archive.

The disc was held aloft, a glint of light from the torches reflecting off the metallic surface. "This contains the documents announcing the reinstatement of the Otherworld Reactor Project, specifically a weapon called the Lance of Kresnik."

The king raised a brow. "The Lance of _Kresnik_ …?" He echoed, a note of recognition in his voice. There was irony to be had in Exodus naming their weapon after a prophetic sage from Rieze Maxian history, and even more so that said weapon shared a name with the man that the king was presumably dating.

Gaius's expression had transformed from concern to anger with only a moment's passing. But he was _listening_ and that was what Jude needed. What they all needed. "Yes, your highness. I was not able to read much of the material, but my possession of it has caused Exodus to pursue me. I believe the content of this disc is something they need, and I don't know how long they'll wait before making a move."

The room fell silent as Gaius crossed his arms, closing his eyes in contemplation. None dare speak until their king said what he wished to say. "We agree to offer aid, yet they use it to create a weapon to be used against my people." Suddenly Jude became nervous; his tone, his stance… It wasn't what he hoped for.

Gaius stood, addressing the room as a whole. "From the beginning our truce has been tentative. I am not deaf to the cries of my people being brutally slaughtered in the name of some false superiority these Elympions proclaim." His arms were lowered, hands balled into tight fists. "And to hear that people holding seats of power have been encouraging these acts… I will not stand for it any longer."

"Your highness," One of the Chimeriad, a tall bearded man with broad shoulders and tribal garb, step forward to gain the king's attention. "Surely you do not mean to denounce the treaty…"

"It is precisely that." Gaius reiterated, and Jude felt his heart drop out of his chest. No, this wasn't what he wanted at all! If the borders are locked down again, the problem would only get worse for Elympios! More people were going to die, the violence would only continue, and Exodus…

"It won't change things." This time it was Alvin who spoke for him, taking a step forward so he stood at Jude's side once more. "Yeah, there are people high-up supporting Exodus, but not all do. And not all Elympions support their actions."

Gaius seemed put off by Alvin's protest, that much was apparent by the searing glare the man received. "That matters little when that support exists. It is as the boy said; our aid was used against us and for that there will be repercussions."

"Yeah, I get that, but you're forgetting that Exodus themselves exist on both sides of the border. They have for decades, right under your nose." Just for emphasis, Alvin tapped his own nose, winking at Gaius. "But you knew that, didn't you?"

The king was all but glowering at Alvin now, and Jude wasn't sure if it was a good or bad thing that he was sassing the ruler of an entire country. Didn't Alvin have any sense of self-preservation anymore?

"You'd be wise to know your place, spy. Do not think I have not heard of your activities. I, too, have eyes beyond my border."

Alvin shrugged and Jude was beginning to sweat. This conversation was already going south and he was unsure of how to steer it back. And Alvin was _not_ helping in the least. At this rate, they'd be thrown out for disrespecting the king, if not imprisoned.

But just as Jude was beginning to apologize for Alvin's remarks, another voice cut him off. "Perhaps I may offer a suggestion."

From behind them entered an older gentleman, garbed in a suit typical of the Elympion highlife. His silvery hair was tied back in a neat braid, a well-groomed beard accenting his pale features; the picturesque impression of a wise sage. "Things are looking lively as usual, my lord."

"Rowen." Gaius's attention was pulled from Alvin with the man's approach. "You have returned."

 _Rowen… As in Rowen Ilbert?_ Jude knew that name all too well. He was a legend in his homeland, a man that was said to have turned many battles in favor of the Rashugal army on many occasions, earning the nickname _the Conductor._ He stood as Chief of Staff prior to the fall of the king, and came to act as Prime Minister once the kingdoms were united. He had been on television numerous times, speaking on behalf of Rieze Maxia on the many issues both countries were facing. A man of great prestige; Jude would have been star-struck if he were not so anxious about the outcome of the conversation.

He approached the king and bowed at the waist, addressing him formally. "Yes, and at no better time, it seems. I am afraid that I stand with these outsiders on this matter."

Gaius was taken aback by his statement, but it was quickly masked by that stern visage of which the king seemed fond. "I imagine you have an explanation, then."

"Indeed I do." With hands tucked behind his back, Rowen spoke, addressing the room with all the grace one would expect of the Prime Minister. "For some time I have watched over the state of unrest within Elympios, and I have seen their plight first hand. Their world dies at their fingertips, and they continue to scramble for a cure to the disease that is causing their world to rot." He turned to Jude, smiling gently at the stunned boy. "That is why we of Rieze Maxia chose to offer our great minds and understanding of the spirits to find a solution."

"And though we offer aid, they still seek to bring harm to our country. They treat my people like beasts to be culled." Gaius countered, becoming heated once again.

Thankfully, Rowen was a practiced expert at cooling his temper. "Yes, there are many who fear our kind, but it is merely a fear of what they do not understand. We cannot hold that against them. Their people see just as much discrimination on our land as we do theirs."

"So are we to stand idly by as they continue this malicious plot against us?" Gaius countered, the heat rising in his tone once more.

Yet even with the king's anger ready to boil once again, Rowen merely smiled. He turned to Jude, regarding him with the same respect he had offered the king. "Jude, was it? What is it you think we should do?"

 _What I think?_ Jude could only stare back in disbelief a moment, finding it difficult to string together his thoughts into words. This was it, the turning point.

"I… I never gave much thought to what was on the other side of the ocean." Jude began, doing his best to keep eye contact with the Prime Minister. "Most of the kids in my class didn't even know Elympios existed, let alone that there were people among us from there."

Jude glanced to Alvin, who gave him an encouraging nod. "A while ago, I found out my father was from Elympios, that he fled from his homeland in hopes of finding a better way of life. He met my mom and started his life over, taking care of the people in Leronde. We don't always see eye to eye, but I know he's a good person. Being Elympion had nothing to do with it.

"Then, everyone started talking about the border treaty. I remember sitting outside of Talim and listening to King Nachtigal's speeches, speaking of another world that needed our help… And I thought, I could do that. If we could work together, we could help those people, just like my parents worked together to help the people of Leronde." A smile spread across Jude's face, warm and reflective. He recalled how his chest would swell with pride whenever they made a small breakthrough in research, the handful of people he had helped to heal small scrapes or twisted ankles. Even if he didn't always receive gratitude in return, he at least could walk away knowing that he had done the right thing. Jude was helping people, and in the end, that was all he really wanted.

Jude finally worked up the courage to look Gaius in the eye, unwavering, standing tall. "More than anything, I want to continue helping the Elympions. I want to see both worlds work together to better our futures. Yes, there are people on both sides that would disagree, but we can't let their opinions force our hand."

"I don't think I could have said it better myself, lad." Rowen applauded softly with gloved hands, regarding Jude with a slight bow. "Perhaps there is hope for the young generations of our people should they all think as openly as you."

Jude blushed vividly, quickly ducking his head at that compliment. "That's… Um, thanks."

Rowen gave another nod before turning back to the king, stroking his beard with one hand as he thought out loud. "Since it is Exodus who wishes the destruction of Rieze Maxia, then it is Exodus that we must seek out. We should address this with the governing bodies of Elympios so they may assist in this endeavor."

"It's not gonna be easy," Alvin interjected. "There are a lot of people high up on the food chain with stakes in Exodus. You're more likely to end up dead in a ditch if you take that approach."

Rowen gave a soft hum of contemplation. "After working closely with said food chain, I'm inclined to believe you. And if there is such a weapon that could so greatly affect our country, then bringing them to the media's attention could force their hand."

"Then a diplomatic approach is still out of the question." Continued Gaius, taking on a thoughtful look himself. "I suppose declaring war would not be in our favor either."

"As much as I'd like to believe in our abilities, we cannot stand against Elympios's technology with mere swords and shields."

Rowen was right; the Elympion army fought with spyrix weapons and had airships at their disposal. A small cavalry could outgun an entire platoon of soldiers given the right conditions. A war would only end with Rieze Maxia's loss.

 _But..._ Jude realized. _It wasn't the military they had to fight, was it?_

"The Lance…" His words caught the attention of the others and suddenly all eyes were on Jude again. "If we destroy the Lance of Kresnik and bring their leader to justice, that knocks the legs from beneath Exodus, doesn't it? Then if we expose their plans, they wouldn't have the means to attack."

"That would make sense." Rowen concurred. "Though can you be so sure that will put a stop to their plans?"

Jude shook his head, his hand coming to rest against the disc in his pocket. "I can't be sure, but the documents that Professor Haus lost his life over dictated that the Otherworld Reactor Plan was their ultimate goal, and that means the lance."

And then, Jude turned to Alvin, the courage burning in his gaze. "Alvin, I know you have ties to Exodus." Family, he reminded himself, but left that out for Alvin's sake. "But I have to ask you to help us. You're the only one who can give us any idea of where Exodus is storing the lance."

Alvin looked at him as if he had grown two heads, as if trusting him with such a task after all that had occurred was completely baffling to him. But Jude only smiled, feeling that deep down, Alvin wanted to do the right thing by stopping this mad charade.

If only Alvin looked as confident in himself as Jude did. "Are you testing my loyalties, kid?"

Again Jude shook his head to the negative. "I have no reason to. You said yourself before that you wanted out. You have no reason to stay with Exodus anymore, right?"

Those words seemed to strike a nerve with Alvin, and he once again looked like he had completely lost himself in Jude's logic. What was going through his head right now, Jude couldn't be sure, but he had little time to dwell on it.

"Your majesty, I would like to request your support in finding the Lance of Kresnik. It's a long shot, but I feel like this is the best way to stop Exodus in their tracks."

The king watched him, unyielding, before crossing his arms across his chest once again. "I agree to this request, and come time for us to face their leader, I hope to stand at your side."

Jude was positively beaming as he bowed as deeply as he could. "Thank you, King Gaius."

"Gaius will suffice." He quipped, before giving Alvin a disparaging look. "And for you, Alvin, I have a message."

Alvin quirked a brow, cocking his hips to one side. "A message?"

"It reads, 'You owe me a new shirt and at least three stiff drinks.' I trust _these_ demand are in relation to your escape, and not something more malicious." There was a predatory glint to Gaius's eye, and Alvin gulped thickly. It would seem that the king was as protective of his lovers as he was the citizens of his kingdom.

"Right… Loud and clear, _Erston_." The quip was muttered under his breath, and if not for the distinct twitch of Gaius's brow Jude would have assumed he had not heard it at all. Perhaps he had been right to assume that Alvin and Gaius knew each other on a more personal level.

Jude did his best not to laugh at both men's discomfort as they were escorted from the throne room and to their quarters for the evening. They had a lot of work to do and they would need proper rest to do it. Jude just hoped they'd be able to find the lance quickly so everything could go back to normal.

 _If_ _they went back to normal…_ Mused Jude. _There's still no telling what will happen when this is all done…_ Silently he looked to Alvin, who was keeping his eyes straight ahead, avoiding every guard that looked their way.

 _I just hope things work out for everyone, especially you, Alvin._


	15. Chapter 15

The room they were allotted in the palace was just as grand as one would expect. Plush furs and fine silks lined the beds, a crackling fire pit inlaid into the floor to keep the room warm, and a grandiosely decorated stained glass door that opened to a balcony overlooking the city.

Under normal circumstances, Jude would be delighted to be staying in such fine quarters during a bleak, snowy night. But he had been ordered to stay put, to not leave his room for his own safety; a command handed down from Gaius upon further explanation of the risk Jude faced by simply being out in the open. Above all, Jude hated to sit around when he could be helping, but that was exactly what he was told to do.

It gave him too much time to think about what was going to happen after they completed their task. Once the lance was gone, would his job remain? He could only imagine what sort of story Balan and Mary were fed to keep things under wraps. They likely thought him just a crazed researcher that had gone off the deep end due to stress. Did they know about the Otherworld Reactor Plan? Were they aware of where their research was going? And even if he was allowed to come back, how much of their funding would be cut after Exodus was removed from the picture? Would they even be able to continue their research? How far up the chain did Exodus have ties?

Though his future as a researcher hung in the balance, Jude's mind continued to drift to issues closer to home. Namely Alvin, his involvement with Exodus, and what he would do when this was all over. Jude recalled the letter from the archive, the name listed there. _Gilandor Yul Svent_ … Svent wasn't a common name from what he knew, so the leader was likely a direct relation to Alvin. Whom and how close, Jude wasn't sure, but he obviously had enough pull in Alvin's life to tie him up in the sordid path of crime and deception.

Regardless of their relation, Alvin was just as likely to suffer the consequences of his betrayal as any other member of such a dangerous organization. Imprisonment, torture, execution… Jude shuddered to think what outcome Alvin would face if and when he was found. But Alvin must have known the dangers, and despite this he still volunteered to join up with the Chimeriad in searching for the lance's location, leaving Jude to wallow in his own thoughts for the time being.

He hated it, feeling so useless as he did, but Rowen's words as they were splitting up still remained in the forefront of his mind. "You are the one they are after, and it is your knowledge that will mean the difference between their success and failure."

And yet he couldn't remain inside as he was told. The room he was allotted was cozy, but in his current state it felt stifling, claustrophobic. As anxious as he was, he couldn't keep still, and being in such an enclosed space was only making him agitated. It was this that led him outside, standing out on the frost-covered balcony, watching the snow drift down from grey clouds in the night. He told himself it was only for a few moments. He'd be safe if it was only a little while, right?

It was freezing, his breath puffing into white clouds before his face as specks of white powdered his hair. But the frigid temperatures kept him awake and alert; the last thing Jude wanted to do right now was to sleep when his companions were in danger.

With a sigh he leaned against the railing, wondering where the others were, if they were safe, if they had found anything useful. Rowen had said that they split up to check out some leads Alvin had drummed up from his contacts. Where those contacts came from remained a mystery, but Jude had to remind himself that this was the best way, and that he needed to trust Alvin on this.

 _Trust Alvin…_

"I thought people from Leronde hated the cold?"

The decadent voice came seemingly from nowhere, and a blur of blue and black landed expertly on the railing. Jude gave a startled yelp before stumbling back, nearly losing his footing on the slick stone. Presa laughed through her nose at his reaction, delicately stepping off the railing and onto the balcony proper.

"P-please don't scare me like that." Jude rattled, taking a slow, deep breath to calm his already harried nerves. If he didn't know better, he would have assumed this woman had it out for him. Perhaps she did, judging from her incessant teasing since their first meeting.

Presa regarded him with a tilt of her chin before leaning against the railing herself, looking out over the city dotted with lamplight. "My lead didn't check out, but the others are still looking." She paused, glancing his way again, expectant. "Alvin's out there as well. I imagine we will hear from them by morning."

"So still no sign of the Lance of Kresnik…" Jude took his spot near the railing again, regarding Presa curiously. This woman… Even if she was not involved in the situation that forced Jude from his job and home on this wild goose chase, she seemed intimately aware of the situation they were facing. They all did, now that the thought of it. How long had they been watching Exodus, waiting for them to make a move? Was it their own observations or Alvin's intel that gave them the information needed?

In the end, he looked to Presa for answers. "How much do you know about what happened to me?"

"A fair amount." She answered nonchalantly. "I know that Alvin was hired to keep your research going while masquerading as your bodyguard, and I heard about the events that were staged in order to facilitate your escape." She paused, her expression suddenly growing grim. "I have to say I'm disappointed. This scenario is certainly not his best work. He's become sloppy in his age."

"Scenario?" Jude repeated, bordering on feeling offended. "Are you saying it's all an act?"

"You believe it isn't?" Presa countered, and Jude had to take a moment to consider her words. Yes, much of what happened was planned to gain his trust and cooperation, but even so, the emotions displayed said otherwise; his own feelings weren't an act, and neither were Alvin's.

Right?

Jude didn't want to believe that Alvin was acting. He wanted to believe that those times of comfort and tenderness, the raw emotions displayed in their moments of weakness were just as genuine as Jude's own feelings. After all they had gone through, Alvin wouldn't be lying about this, would he?

But Presa had thought the same thing before, right? When it was Alvin and her, save that they were more deeply involved than he and Jude. And she had been left behind, betrayed. Had she seen it coming or was she taken by surprise? Was that why she was being so cold about it?

"…Presa, what happened between you and Alvin?" The question left his lips before he had time to consider the consequences of his words. Presa looked at him, shocked, as if she too had not expected such a bold question from the purportedly shy boy.

And yet she smiled, resting her elbows against the balcony as she spoke. "I suppose it's only right to tell you, considering."

Jude wasn't sure what she was considering, but stood quietly and let her speak regardless.

"Alvin and I were both on assignments. At the time I was working for a small rebel group, gathering intel on the soldiers that would pass through Talim. I met Alvin, he was a soldier, and a handsome one at that." She looked off in the distance, hand resting against her cheek, wistfully recalling better times. "I hadn't told him of my mission; to him, I was merely Mink the secretary he had fallen into bed with. But seeing him every day, his charm, his smile, his strength… It was hard not to fall for him. He swept me off my feet with pretty words and promises of a brighter future."

Presa straightened, bracing both hands against the railing as she recounted her tale. "When he proposed to me, I thought: _This is it. I can get out. I can live happily…_ I came clean, I told him everything. I wanted no secrets between us. And he understood, accepted me fully…" Her expression grew dark, as did her story. "Then he sold me out to the Rashugal army and had me thrown into jail."

"He turned you in?" Jude had heard at least this part from Alvin. He had called it an act of self-preservation, that her feeding information about him and his fellow soldiers put him in danger. But if that were the case, couldn't it have been done differently? He loved her, right? And she loved him… They could have ran, or at least in an ideal world that was an option. Jude had never considered himself the type to think that love conquered all, and yet…

Presa sighed, brushing back a strand of hair as a means of composing herself. "I was… _coerced_ to give up the information I had gathered. My old group almost didn't want me back after that. I had been compromised, I couldn't be trusted. I'd probably be dead in a ditch somewhere if it weren't for Gaius…" Her arms were crossed over her chest as she turned to face Jude, seemingly gauging his reaction. "Meanwhile, Alvin had moved onto his next mission, leaving no ties to the men he sold me out to."

"That's…" Awful, horrible, inhumane. So many words to describe, and yet he couldn't bring himself to actually voice them. Was it because it was Alvin they were talking about?

Presa shook her head, cutting Jude off before he could speak. "You can see why I was so upset to be called on after so many years, as if the situation meant nothing to him. Even now, I feel like I was only worth the bounty on my head to him."

The two were silent, Jude having to process this information. While the details of her story were different, the situation as a whole sounded so similar to his own. In spite of himself, Jude had fallen for Alvin. His kindness, his laugh, the way he would dote on him and joke around. The way he'd call him kid and worry over him constantly even when Jude insisted he was fine. Those nights they spent at each other's side, just _existing_ together…

Were these the things that Presa felt four years ago? The same qualities that Alvin had displayed to gain her trust and affection? Had Alvin known of Presa's mission all along, or had he truly been sideswiped by her confession to the point that he felt compelled to tell his superiors?

And for that matter, why was Presa telling him all this? To divulge something so personal to someone you had only met a few hours ago, and had only seen in passing before. Was it because of Jude's involvement with Alvin, whom she had seen firsthand how crooked and dangerous he was? An attempt to scare him away? Or… Was she trying to prevent another tragedy from unfolding?

Suddenly Presa's words held a purpose in Jude's mind. "You think the same thing will happen to me, don't you?"

The woman nodded, canting her hips to the side. "You're just a child, Jude. You don't know what it's like to be strung along, to think you were part of something profound, only to find out you were used."

"But I do." Jude interrupted. "I _do_ know what that's like."

Once again Presa was caught off-guard by the boy's words, but her shock was quickly masked by a quirked brow and a sardonic smirk. "Do you now?"

Jude nodded. "All this time, I thought I was working to help save the people of Elympios, but then this whole thing with Exodus… All my research into safely harnessing spirit energy was going into the weapon to annihilate my own people, and I hadn't a clue." To say it out loud still hurt, but Jude continued, determined to prove that he wasn't just some inexperienced child blind to the ways of the world. "It may not have been by someone I loved, but I _was_ used, and that's why I'm here, making sure they don't do it again to me or anyone else."

Presa gazed upon him, shock fading into satisfaction as she chuckled lightly into her hand. "I see why Alvin has become attached to you… Your convictions…"

Jude could feel his ears burn. Alvin was… attached? Somehow that conflicted with everything Presa had said to him so far. "I… I don't understand. Weren't you just saying he was acting?"

"I never said that." She stated bluntly, running finely manicured fingers through her pale locks. "I merely stated that his scenario was sloppy. He was careless, getting so attached to his target."

"You tricked me." Jude stated with a huff. No wonder this woman did so well as a spy; she played him like a fiddle. Or was she merely testing his faith in Alvin?

The woman chuckled, turning to lean against the railing once more. "Alvin is… Kind, but he doesn't trust people. It's not that anyone gives him a reason to; it's just that he chooses to distance himself. He used to say he couldn't connect on that level, that it took a special person for him to tell anything to." Presa glanced to Jude, smiling almost sadly. "Even when we were in love, I found him hard to read. I could never really tell what he was thinking. But I was okay with that, because I had secrets myself…"

There was comfort in knowing that even those close to Alvin knew little about him. But her words begged the question; did Alvin trust him? He… wanted to trust Alvin more than anything. He wanted to think he had changed, that he really was trying to get out of that life and start over. But Presa's words once again cast doubt on those ever wavering convictions of his, and Jude found it difficult to voice these fears.

"Jude." Presa called him from his thoughts, her eyes seemingly staring right into his soul. "Do yourself a favor and don't get further involved with Alvin until this is all over. You never know where a turncoat stands until they show their hand."

Her words shouldn't have come as a shock, yet Jude found himself taken aback by them never the less. "You think that Alvin might turn against us?"

She shook her head, pushing away from the balcony and heading for the door. "I can't say, and that alone is cause for concern. Alvin sides with himself above anyone else." She looked his way, her eyes a warning. "Do not repeat my mistakes, little Judy."

"J-Judy…" Jude sputtered and Presa laughed. She definitely got a kick from getting a rise out of the boy.

The glass doors were pushed open and Presa entered the room, brushing the snow from her hair and onto the stone floor. "I must report to Gaius of my findings."

"Will they find the lance in time?" He asked, following her into the room.

"I'm certain _something_ will be found. No one can hide from the Chimeriad at full force."

Jude wanted to express his relief, but his mind was still stuck on the conversation they had on the balcony. So much had been revealed, and yet the information only brought more questions. Alvin's loyalties and where they lay. The fate of Exodus and the man that Jude had come to love. Whether Alvin had placed any trust in him…

Instead of any of those queries, he spoke the first one that came to mind.

"Presa, do you still love Alvin?"

The woman paused, and without turning to face Jude she merely snorted, arms crossed. "Love is giving someone the power to destroy you, but trusting them not to. I don't trust Alvin, and you shouldn't either." Such strong words, and spoken with so little bite… Perhaps she still held feelings for him after all.

"Get some sleep, Jude. We will move as soon as we have information."

And with that she pushed past the heavy oak doors into the main hall, leaving Jude to mull over the facts he had been given. He should have been thinking of their next move, what he would do once they found Exodus's hideout, or trying to figure out where the lance was being kept, yet all he could think about were Alvin and Presa's words. Trust, attachment, dedication… Did Alvin even trust him? Would Alvin abandon what ties he had made with Jude for the sake of saving his own skin? Would he turn him in to Exodus, just as he had turned Presa in for the bounty on her head?

Too many unanswered questions, none that he had any hope of resolving without Alvin at his side. She said not to trust him, and yet, Jude did indisputably. And Jude wanted it to be mutual. He wanted Alvin to rely on him just as he had for the last few months. He wanted to bridge the gap between his painful past and the brighter future, offer Alvin a means to start a new life free of those ties that held him to Exodus.

But could he? Would Alvin even allow it? Or would he run, just as Presa thought he would?

Nothing would be answered by simply repeating the questions to himself. He needed to speak to Alvin on this when the time was right. For now, however, they needed to focus on their mission; it was the only way for any of them to get out of the situation they were stuck in. If they just kept going, then Alvin would have the chance to start over with his life, and Jude would be able to continue on his path.

Jude lay upon one of the plush beds, hoping to get some rest. And yet, as expected, his mind would not allow him such luxury. He merely remained motionless, staring at the whirling snow that filtered past the decorative window, wondering if the others were out in it, or if their leads had brought them to warmer climes.

He wondered what Alvin was doing, if he was staying true to his own convictions and doing what he could to help them.

 _"Alvin sides with himself above anyone else."_

 _So if it came down to self-preservation… Would Alvin betray us? Would he leave everything we've worked for and just…_

The heavy door opened, a sliver of torchlight cast upon his still form. Jude froze in place, half-expecting a hostile party, only to be greeted by a familiar voice.

"You awake, kid?"

Alvin called from the entryway, yet Jude did not answer, only continued to lie quietly. Jude suspected he'd leave if he gave no response, feigning unconsciousness as an excuse to save his words. But instead of the expected silence, Jude felt the mattress dip, Alvin taking a seat on the opposite side.

"I wanted to say I'm sorry… For everything." The man recited the words as if he had been practicing them all day, as if he was finding relief in an audience that was supposedly not awake to question him. "When this is all said and done, I promise to never trouble you again… When Gilland is gone, I'm going to bow out of your life, everyone's lives…"

 _So this is it._ Jude thought, trying to keep his breath even, his body completely still through Alvin's confession. _He's really running away._ Somehow he hoped that Alvin would reconsider his plan, come back with him to Trigleph and let things go back to how they were before. Before the incident at the lab, before Exodus sent them running and shattered what hopes Jude held for their future.

"I don't know where I'll be going, or if I'll ever come back but… I just can't do this anymore." He sighed, and Jude felt the bed shift once again, and a warm hand came to rest gently on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Jude. It's better for you this way."

 _It's better this way? How is it better?_

 _You could stay, we could figure this out... If you're not happy with where you are, then let's change it. Let me help you. Isn't that a better idea? But… that's not an option to you, is it?_

 _No, you want to run. You want to cut ties. But why do you speak as though you're marching to your death? You… You don't think you can be saved, do you? You don't think you can come back from all of this whole._

So many things he could say, yet with a broken voice Jude spoke only one. "It's hard for you, isn't it?" He reached up to gently grip Alvin's hand, causing the older man to flinch. "To get close to others? To rely on them?"

"Jude…" Alvin attempted to pull his hand away, as if having his confession heard had thrown his confidence completely off-kilter. Yet Jude would not allow him to run, not when this could be their last night together, their last chance to speak of their feelings.

Jude gently laced his fingers in Alvin's as he spoke. "Then… Do what you need to do…" It hurt. It hurt so badly to hear that he was going to disappear, that he would never see him again. He didn't want Alvin to leave, but Jude couldn't force him to stay either. It would be selfish to demand that of the older man, so in the end, he wished to at least close the last door.

"Alvin, do you trust me?" He asked quietly, his grip on Alvin's hand tightening if only to prevent him from fleeing before his query had been answered.

Alvin remained silent for what felt like ages, and Jude didn't think his heart could hurt more from the lack of answer. Then, the man spoke again. "Yeah, I do. I know you'll make things right. That's your mission, after all."

Jude had thought those words would lessen the tightness in his chest, but it only served to coil it up more. He wanted to cry, but held it in, squeezing back the tears along with the urge to throw his arms around Alvin and beg him to stay at his side.

He couldn't do it. It would be selfish to tether that man when he so desperately wanted to get away. Jude could only make the most of this night, and hope that it would be enough to ease his aching heart.

"Then… Will you stay with me tonight?"

It took a long moment for Alvin to respond, and Jude feared that he would decline, choosing to spend the night on his own like he had been. But after another long moment, Alvin complied, finally pulling his hand away and settling down to rest at Jude's back.

One could call it desperation or even impulse, but Jude felt no reason to justify turning over and pressing himself to Alvin's chest, burying his face in his shirt. This was their last night, and he wasn't going to try and hide his feelings anymore; fear, longing, uncertainty, love… He could not put them into words, but he wanted to convey them with at least this action.

Alvin seemed to understand these unspoken words, wrapping his arms around Jude and holding him tightly, shielding him from the cold and his own thoughts. He needed it. They _both_ needed it, and it was a wonder it took so long for either to act on it.

As Jude finally began to succumb to his exhaustion, he muttered a quiet thank you against Alvin's chest. He hoped it was heard.


	16. Chapter 16

It was just after dawn when the rallying cries of soldiers woke Jude from his slumber. Without being told he knew what the sound meant; the lance had been found, and soon they would depart for the final confrontation.

As he sat up Jude's eyes fell to the bed, only to find it empty, the warmth having long since gone with the second occupant. He should have expected that Alvin would leave before the sun was up, but part of him wished he had stayed. It was their last night together; it would have been nice to see Alvin's peaceful face as he came into waking.

He quickly shook off the nagging sentiments. There was no time; the lance had been located, and within the next few hours this would all be over. Whatever consequences that entailed he'd have to face them head-on, with or without Alvin.

The others were already gathered in the courtyard when Jude arrived, Gaius standing among his men, Alvin mere meters away. As he approached the king's attention turned to Jude, regarding him with a short nod. "We received word as to the location of the Lance of Kresnik. Our scouts have confirmed the information to be accurate."

"Where did they find it?"

Alvin was quick to take a place at Jude's side as he provided the answer. "There's an abandoned cruise liner floating in the waters off of Marksburg; the _Zenethra_. It's been drifting between the two continents since an accident twenty years ago." He recalled the information with such clarity that Jude had to wonder how familiar he was with the ship in question. "The lance has been moved there."

"Moved there? Where was it before?"

No answer save for the shake of Alvin's head. "Doesn't matter. If it's there, then so is Gilland. Now's our best chance to take both out."

"We've already made preparations for an aerial assault on the _Zenethra_." Gaius announced. "We will utilize the wyverns to deploy soldiers to the ship, then destroy the lance from the inside."

"I'm going with you." Jude proclaimed suddenly, much to everyone's surprise.

Except Gaius, who looked upon the boy with expectant curiosity. "Are you certain? We know not how strong their numbers, and know little of what other weapons they keep." A pause, a glance to Alvin who immediately looked away, as if he too knew something that Jude didn't. "It is very likely you may not come back."

"I know." Jude stated, staring down the king with fiery determination to match the man's own. "But if it's my research that they're using to power the Lance of Kresnik, then I can stop it before anyone gets hurt." He had resolved within himself that he would not stand back and let others fix the mess he unknowingly caused. He would never forgive himself if things went to hell while he remained safe behind the castle walls. And so Jude decided to fight, for his future and everyone else's.

It was as if Gaius sensed his thoughts, and the barest of smiles graced his face. "Then you shall fly among us. We leave at the top of the hour." The king pushed past him, the Chimeriad following close behind, Presa bringing up the rear. She paused for a brief moment before he and Alvin, as if she wanted to say something but ultimately decided against it. Jude wouldn't ask; he had already heard her words, and decided to place his trust in Alvin.

Jude began to follow when Alvin suddenly grabbed his shoulder, stopping him in his tracks. "Jude, wait." There was a pause, Alvin swallowing audibly behind him. "You know you don't have to go." His voiced wavered as he spoke, as if uncertain of his own words even then. One last plea for Jude to stay behind where he would be safe from harm, out of Exodus's reach. But Jude knew he couldn't back down now. His decision had been made, and he'd see it through until the end.

With a soft shake of his head, Jude gently lifted the hand from his shoulder, turning to face Alvin properly. "I have to, Alvin. This might be our only chance to end this." Their eyes met, Alvin's expression almost blank. It was as if he had spent the morning steeling himself, preparing to lose everything just in case their mission went awry. And yet there was a furrow to his brow, the slight twitch of a frown when Jude took his hand.

"You said you trusted me, right?" Jude gently held Alvin's hand with both of his own, a small comfort to share. "Then trust me to fix things."

Alvin stared back, dumbfounded and unable to do little more than squeeze Jude's hand in return. For a long moment he kept that simple touch, a flurry of emotions running past Alvin's tired eyes. But in the end, they became blank once more, his expression returning to the same cold façade he wore that day in Helioborg. "You've already made up your mind then." Alvin's voice was barely above his whisper as he tore his hand away, as if unable to look at Jude any longer.

"Alvin…"

"The others are waiting." He called back almost coldly. "I'll ride with you." A parcel was picked up from the stone steps at Alvin's feet and tossed unceremoniously at Jude. The boy fumbled the package, nearly dropping it before finally catching it securely in his hands. "You'll need these if you're coming along."

Curious, Jude unwrapped the brown paper, revealing a pair of small, scaled gauntlets. A weapon designed for him? But when did…

"Alvin?"

This time Alvin did turn, the smile on his face bordering on somber. "I'm counting on you to make good use of them."

The smile was returned as Jude trotted behind his older companion, clutching the gift close to his chest as they caught up with the rest of the soldiers. Soon it would all be over and things could return back to normal.

At least, he hoped.

A small army descended from the sky on the backs of dozens of silver wyverns. The king's personal collection of aerial beasts utilized to the fullest for this mission. Gaius himself headed the assault, the Chimeriad flying in formation behind him with his soldiers taking up the rear. Alvin and Jude hung further back, their strategy to remain out of the line of fire until they landed.

Exodus was expecting them, as was apparent by the pair of heavily armed airships hovering nearby, flanking both sides of the rusted vessel. The gunfire began as soon as they came into range, aimed at the heart of their wyvern formation.

"Scatter!" Gaius called from the head of the group before taking a steep dive, narrowly avoiding the assault aimed his way. The soldiers behind him didn't stand a chance, a handful on the back of one unsuspecting beast taking the brunt of the blow before falling from their mount, tumbling to the ocean below as the wyvern fled out of self-preservation.

Their formation was broken, the soldiers steering in every which direction to avoid being targeted themselves. The cannons followed, tracking their movements with ease. "Use evasive maneuvering!" Gaius commanded, his words just barely audible over the canon fire. "Continue moving towards the ship! Do not give them an easy target!"

The soldiers shouted their affirmative, taking to flying in a zig-zag motion towards the _Zenethra_. All save for Alvin, who ducked below the cannon fire and circled around the outside of the group, eyes set on the deck of one of the airships. "What are you doing?!" Jude called over the chaos. "You're flying straight for them!"

Alvin tugged on the reigns and their wyvern suddenly pitched upward, Jude only barely hanging on as they rose. Suddenly they were above the deck of the left-most airship, the men manning the cannons on deck standing mere meters below them. Alvin pulled his pistol from its holster, taking only a half a second to aim before firing, taking out the cannoneers with expertly timed shots. Jude would have been amazed if he was not horrified by the scene unfolding before him. Even now, he didn't wish for people to be hurt, whether they were on his side or not.

The removal of the cannoneers only bought them a few moments. More Exodus soldiers spilled out from below deck, abandoning their previous posts in favor of dropping to the _Zenethra_ below where a skirmish had broken out between the two forces. "Take us down!" Jude ordered. "We need to help Gaius!"

"You itching that much for a fight?" Alvin quipped, pulling the reigns sharply and their wyvern dropped from the sky, gliding over the deck of the _Zenethra_ close enough to allow them to jump down safely.

No sooner had their feet touched the ground did the soldiers converge on them, as if they recognized the two as more a threat than Gaius's soldiers. Alvin wasted no time in taking them on, keeping as many at bay as he could with his pistol alone. Any that came closer than that were warded off with quick hits and kicks, courtesy of Jude and his years of martial arts training under Sonya's instruction.

From his back, he heard Alvin laugh. "Remind me to never get into a fist fight with you."

Jude snorted, finding Alvin's banter a welcome reprieve in the heat of battle. "You haven't even seen me in pique condition. Catch me after a vacation to Leronde."

"Right, your teacher lives there." Another round fired, another soldier falling to the deck. "I should have asked you to take me before. You could have introduced me to your parents."

That caught him off guard. Of all the times for Alvin to tease him, he chose _now_? "Can you be serious? We're in a battle!"

Alvin laughed as he put another bullet into a nearby soldier's chest. "And here I was going to ask if you wanted a break!"

Gaius himself finally landed nearby, as did the Chimeriad, and with their aid the battle quickly shifted in their favor. The king alone would have been enough to take on the number of troops that remained, but with his guards at his side the Exodus soldiers had no hope of victory.

For a moment the fight appeared to be won, until the roar of another airship arrived, reinforcement troops dropping onto the deck to join the fight and avenge their fallen comrades.

"We cannot continue as we are!" Gaius shouted over the din of the battle. "Let us seek out the lance and end this!"

"Right!" Jude threw another soldier off balance, watching as they stumbled backwards into an oncoming group of enemies. Both he and Alvin broke away from the fighting, running for the stairs that led below deck, Gaius and the Chimeriad in tow.

Jude had never imagined he would see a cruise ship in his lifetime. They were excessive luxuries that were not only impractical but also nearly implausible with their level of technology. But they were not above the Elympions, whom toted their technological prowess with pride. Yet Jude found himself wholly underwhelmed when he stepped below deck. The fixtures of the ship remained intact; crystal chandeliers, elegant staircases, decorative wall hangings that had faded over the years. But the rest seemed as if it had been gutted, lacking the furniture one would expect of a ship that was to house hundreds of people. Just how long had this vessel drifted, and why was it allowed to do so for so long?

Questions for later, Jude reminded himself. They had better things to focus on.

Alvin led the group, reaching into his pockets and revealing a roll of parchment with a detailed blueprint of the ship etched upon it. "Where did you get that?" Jude inquired, examining the faded text.

"I've had it." Alvin answered flatly, only sparing Jude a passing glance. "Remember that ship accident I mentioned?"

Jude's eyes grew wide. The ship accident that claimed his father's life, the one that he and only a few others survived… "This ship has been here that long?"

Alvin nodded, flipping the map over, revealing a set of numbers scribbled on the back. "It's been here since that day… It would figure hewould choose to bring the lance here. Gilland always had a fondness for irony."

The way Alvin spoke of him, that taste of disdain and familiarity in his voice. "You seem to know him well…"

There was no answer, only the swift folding of the map before it was placed back in his pocket. This time it was Gaius to break the silence. "Have you any idea of where the lance is being stored?"

Alvin nodded, pointing to a room down corridor, "The grand hall. The ceiling opens to the sky. If he's got it stashed here, that's where he'll put it."

"Then we move on." Gaius pushed past him, heading towards the other end of the corridor. The amount of soldiers below deck was sparing, the majority of them still fighting the army that remained upstairs. It wouldn't take long for them to show up, Jude imagined, and so he continued moving alongside the others.

Their progress was halted when they came across a strange corridor, blocked by quietly buzzing beams of light. Alvin held an arm out to stop everyone before they got too close. "Barrier bars." He stated, pulling the map from his pocket again, taking note of the numbers scribbled on the back. "I should be able to deactivate them." He stepped to the control panel stationed against the exterior wall, punching in the code and grinning with satisfaction when the display lit up green and the bars disappeared.

"Easy enough." Alvin walked through the entry as if to show that it was safe, turning to face the others with a grin and a wave. "Let's keep moving."

The group did not budge, all eyes on Alvin. Gaius crossed his arms, giving the mercenary a skeptical look. "Just where did you come across that code?"

Alvin lost the cheerful expression almost instantly. "I have my sources. Now let's move on."

"And which source is that? The same that told you the location of the lance?" Gaius was suspicious of him, and Jude couldn't really blame him. It was far too convenient, wasn't it? And yet…

"C'mon now, Gaius. I'm risking my neck trying to get you guys through here. Cut me some slack." He turned to Jude, as if requesting backup. "You believe me, right, Jude?"

Caught off guard, Jude could do little more than nod dumbly, brows furrowed as he sought reassurance from Gaius. The king only shook his head.

"We… We should keep moving." Jude stammered, stepping through the gate. But just as Jude crossed the threshold, a loud, mechanized buzzing sounded as the barrier activated, effectively barring the rest of the party.

"The hell?" Alvin fiddled with the control panel on their side, tapping in the numbers he had just used, only to have the display blink red with a denial. "Damn it… They blocked the access code." He growled, pounding his fist against the panel in frustration.

From behind the king, Presa scoffed, casting doubtful glances to her comrades. "Why am I not surprised?" She then looked to the king, as if asking what their next move should be.

In spite of his words just moments prior, Gaius kept his focus. He appeared to be carefully examining the strange blockade, as if thinking of a way to break through it by force. Alvin was quick to put an end to that idea. "You can't use a sword against it, the blade will just melt through."

"Can you disable it?" Jude looked at the control panel, noting its simplicity. He had a feeling just smashing it wouldn't do them any good.

Alvin pulled his map out, scanning for something before passing the parchment through the bars. "Find the generator rooms. They power the barriers. If you destroy them, the barriers will turn off again."

Gaius accepted the map with a stern nod before turning to his party. "We split up and destroy them individually. We've no time to waste."

The guards gave their king a proper salute before running off to complete their task. Gaius cast one last look in their direction before hurrying off to aid his men. Jude watched him leave, a feeling of dread creeping up his spine once again. "Will they be all right?"

Alvin's hand came to grip his shoulder but briefly before pulling away, continuing down the hallway. "We have to keep moving. We need to destroy the lance before Gilland has time to activate it." His voice was level as he spoke, calm. Too calm. The sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach only intensified, yet Jude followed regardless, remembering his mission, _their_ mission.

Their footprints echoed along the empty halls as Jude and Alvin continued towards their destination. Past the barrier bars there were no soldiers, no guards, not a soul to cross their path. Just a short distance away there were dozens of soldiers fighting, and yet the hall remained void of any life save their own. The strange desolation made the ship truly feel like it was abandoned, just as it had been for the last twenty years.

It was unsettling, this silence, and the tension only served to make Jude's nervousness all the more obvious. Were the others all right? Had they run into any guards? And Alvin… "Alvin, is this really all right?" He asked, seeking sort of explanation to ease his anxiety. "Shouldn't we wait for the others?" If they were supposedly meeting Gilland at the end of this, then wouldn't they need all the backup they could get?

Alvin remained silent, shoulders squared, eyes straight ahead. Nothing like the casual way he usually carried himself. And those incredulous looks from the others, the coincidental closing of the barrier that separated them from the rest of the group… Something was definitely wrong.

Jude grabbed his hand, stopping him in his tracks. "Alvin!" The man's shoulders stiffened but he didn't turn to face him. This only served to worry Jude more. "Alvin, you know something, don't you?"

Alvin visibly flinched, his head drooping slightly. "…I need you to trust me, Jude."

"You're making me question if I should." Jude quickly circled the taller man, standing before him so Alvin would be forced to look him in the eye. "If something is going on, I need you to tell me now."

Again Alvin couldn't keep his gaze, something Jude had already begun associating with his need for secrecy. "It'll be over soon, just bear with me a little longer, all right?"

"Quit talking like this is the end!" He hadn't intended to raise his voice, but his thoughts, his emotions were running away with him. All the words left unsaid, things Jude vowed to keep to himself for the sake of them both, came tumbling out in the heat of the moment. "You keep saying things like how you'll disappear, that I'll never have to see you again…" He was shaking, but he didn't care. He simply grabbed Alvin's hand with both of his, not once looking away. "But what if that's not what I want, huh? Why are you so insistent on running?"

At his outburst Alvin finally lifted his head just enough to see just how bewildered he was by the young man's words. "Jude…" Alvin chewed his bottom lip, eyes askance. "You don't know what you're getting yourself into. You don't know what I…"

"Quit assuming you know what I want!" Jude cut him off before Alvin had the chance to deprecate himself further. These words, the emotions behind him, Jude needed to make them known before he lost this chance. "I'm not a child. I can decide for myself who I'm going to stay with and who I choose to trust, so don't make me regret trusting you."

For a long moment, Alvin stared him down, a myriad of emotions crossing his face. Confusion, frustration, fear, longing… All culminating in the question he posed to Jude. "Those things Presa said. Those were true, you know. After all the things I've done, and all the things that might happen in the future…" His voice became low, pained as he drew his eyes away. "You'd really… With a guy like me?"

"Let me decide that." Jude gave an emphatic nod, and though his stomach was filled with anxious butterflies borne from the day this mysterious mercenary sauntered into his life, he still found it in him to smile. "When this is over, let's keep moving… Together."

"Jude…" Absolutely stunned by his words, Alvin lifted his free hand, reaching for something. Perhaps Jude's shoulder, perhaps his cheek, but hesitation seemed to get the best of him and the hand was retracted suddenly, the other pulled from Jude's grip. "I'm sorry, I…"

A sudden, mechanized rumble sounded from the end of the corridor and Alvin cursed. "Damn it… He's already starting!" He took off like a shot, running at full speed down the hall with Jude in tow.

"Alvin, hold on! Gaius and the others!"

"There's no _time_!" Alvin protested, pulling his gun from the holster and loading a fresh round. Jude stuck at his side, making sure his gauntlets were tight around his wrists as they made their way to their destination.

In a miraculous display of brute force, Alvin kicked open the door and they both rushed inside.

Even after twenty years of disuse, the Grand Hall remained immaculate and beautiful as if untouched by time. A gilded ballroom decorated with intricate, twisting metal fixtures and a crystalline dance floor that provided a glimpse of the complex inner workings of the ship. At the far end, a massive skylight with a stunning view of the setting sun... and just below, was the barrel of a massive canon aimed right for it.

The Lance of Kresnik was there, and standing before it, a man garbed in blue. Silvery hair accented by streaks of red, slicked back to reveal an aged man that bore an eerie resemblance to one Jude had seen before. It all came together when he slowly turned to face the intruders, his stoic expression evolving into one of twisted pleasure. _That day… The man I ran into at the square..._

Gilandor Yul Svent. The leader of Exodus. The man Alvin had called "Gilland".

From his place at the end of the hall he slowly turned to face the intruders, voice echoing off the glass interior. "Finally, _finally_ , you arrive. I was beginning to wonder if I would have to hunt you down myself." He stepped down from the platform, his weapon swinging at his side. A gun, like Alvin's own, but with a longer barrel that nearly scraped the ground as he walked. "It's good to see you, Alfred."

Alvin threw an arm out to bar Jude's path, or was it to protect him from this man? "Stay back, Jude."

"Ah, so this is Jude? The little kitten that Leticia spoke of? Now what was it she said…" Gilland placed a hand to his chin in mock thought. "You wished to take care of him until the end? Sound about right?"

Alvin growled, finger visibly twitching on his gun. "Leticia is gone, no thanks to you."

Gilland's expression faltered for only a second before the bemusement returned to his face. "Such malice towards your dear uncle… And yet, you eagerly obey just as the dog you are…" His eyes drifted to Jude, a sadistic grin crossing his pale features. "After all, you brought the boy, just as I requested."

Jude took a half-step back, a sudden panic gripping his chest. Gilland wanted Alvin to bring him here? Had he been ordered to deliver him to Gilland? His eyes drifted to Alvin, pleading for explanation. "Alvin, you… You didn't…"

Alvin did not answer.

"Was it not obvious?" Gilland chuckled, stepping closer with his own weapon aimed at Alvin's head while his eyes remained on Jude. "Did you think that I didn't _know_ that Alfred let you live after finding out about our plan? Or that you fled Elympios with the information I needed?" His expression turned decidedly dark, the muzzle of his gun drifting from Alvin's head to Jude's own. "I intended to execute you and him both for his little escapade, but Alfred was… _Remorseful_. He knew he had to atone for disobeying me, so we arranged this little meeting."

The more Gilland spoke, the more aggravated Alvin seemed to become. Yet he said nothing to defend himself, only cut his eyes away from Jude when the boy looked his way. Was it true? Had he been strung along, playing into Gilland's plans from the beginning?

Suddenly Alvin's strange behavior made sense. Telling him he didn't need to go, separating them from the group. He was orchestrating this deal with the enemy all along. One last betrayal, his final hurrah. No, Jude didn't want to believe it. Alvin wanted to get out. Alvin wanted to change. Alvin…

Alvin cocked his gun, aiming it straight at Gilland's head. "We had a deal, Gilland." He vehemently spat, his cool visage replaced with one of near uncontrollable anger. "Just take what you want and let him go."

 _What? Let me go?_

"Ah, yes, your little bargain…" More laughing, the very sound making Jude's skin crawl. "I had not expected such sentimentality from you, Alfred. All over this _kitten_ …"

Jude's gaze snapped to Alvin again, a mixture of horror and disbelief filling his voice. "Alvin, what have you done?"

The steely gaze that was trained on Gilland faltered with Jude's words. "It was the only way I could get you out of this, Jude." Alvin took his eyes from his adversary long enough to lock with Jude's own, as if to apologize. He had arranged this for him? At what cost?

Resting his gun against his shoulder, Gilland held a hand to Jude, beckoning him closer. "Now, bring me that disc, boy."

Instinctively Jude clapped a hand over his shirt pocket to protect the item in question. "No!" The bargain for his life, for both of their lives, was to give up the very thing he had risked everything to keep away from Exodus. How, knowing all this, could Alvin simply barter it away? Did he truly feel there was no other alternative? Was Gilland's hold over him really that strong?

Jude took another step back, and thankfully Alvin didn't stop him. "All that data, the research we were doing… I won't let you use it to hurt people!"

Gilland snorted, lips curling into a smirk. "Such naiveté. I've little use for the research on that disc now. We've already implemented what was needed. All that's left is to activate the Lance of Kresnik, and everything that we have accomplished with your aid will be complete."

"No…" Jude shook his head in disbelief. The Lance… It couldn't be already completed, could it? Was it a bluff? Or had this fight truly been for naught? He had to know. "If there's no use for it, why do you need it? What good is it now?!"

"The activation system." Alvin suddenly answered, expression flat even as he continued to aim his gun towards their enemy. "That archive you found contained the vital programs that make the lance run. Haus stole that and locked it away with that access card you found. Without it, the disc is the only copy he has left."

"You can't be serious…" Jude could not help but stare in shock as the plan was revealed. All along, he had been told it was because of the research and damning evidence that Exodus was so adamant about keeping hidden. He had fled the country, even contacted the king in hopes of exposing the conspiracy and putting a stop to the madness. But it was a lie, all of it. The Lance of Kresnik was already complete and there had been no need for him or his research. He was just being kept around to find the stolen archive.

And Alvin had brought it right to the man who sought to use it to destroy the spirits of his country.

 _How could I have been so blind?_ Jude clenched his fist, teeth gritted in frustration. _I was used as nothing more than a tool all along, and I didn't even realize it. And Alvin … He played me, too._

"My, what a _look_." Gilland chided, mocking Jude as he stood halfway across the room, gun idly aimed at his person. "Does it hurt knowing how fruitless your efforts were? And you were so _brave_ in guarding that little disc." Another snort of laugher, so pleased was Gilland of his plight. Jude felt the overwhelming urge to knock that smug look from his face.

"Knock it off, Gilland." Alvin interrupted him, cocking his pistol threateningly before looking to Jude. "Give him the disc, Jude."

Jude fervently shook his head, keeping one hand on the disc. "No!" He stepped back, checking over his shoulder. Could he run? Would he be gunned down if he tried?

"Jude, just do it. He'll let you go and you can figure out another way." Alvin's words were little comfort. This wasn't how this was supposed to go. They were supposed to apprehend Gilland and destroy the lance, not allow him to go on with his plan just to save himself. What other way was there?

"It won't matter if he's already destroyed my home!" Jude was starting to panic, quickly losing his calm with each passing moment. He had to do something, he had to…

Then, it occurred to him. If they needed the disc to activate the lance, then… "I'll... I'll destroy it!" He pulled the disc free and held it aloft, ready to throw it to the ground and crush it. That would be the end. Gilland would have no way to proceed with his plan, or at the very least he could buy them some time. They could go home. They could-

Shots echoed through the grand hall, and then silence. Time slowed to a crawl as Jude watched Alvin stumble back, spatters of red blooming across his left shoulder and chest. A hand came to grip his now ruined shirt, as if the pain had not hit him yet as he stared at the wound in disbelief. Alvin gave a wet cough, a trail of blood dribbling from his lips. "You…" The pistol slipped from his hand, clattering to the ground as his legs threatened to give from beneath him. "You _bastard_ …"

Then, another shot, a blossom of crimson striking Alvin's right leg just above the knee, taking them out from beneath him with a strangled cry. Alvin crumpled to the glass floor, pained curses tumbling from his lips as he curled unto himself in agony.

"Alvin!" The disc was tucked into his pocket as panic hit him full force. Jude scrambled across the glass floor to Alvin, quickly rolling him onto his side and pressing his hands to the man's bleeding chest. "Alvin, just hold on!" He pleaded, channeling his mana into the older man's body to heal his injuries. They were numerous and deep; the gun Gilland carried was unlike any he'd seen before. He had counted three shots yet there were many more entry wounds to tend to than that. Jude feared he would not have enough spirits to call upon in such a desolate place to piece him back together.

And yet while he was frantically trying to heal him, Alvin only pushed his hand away. "Damn it… Deal's off, Jude. Get out of here." Alvin's voice was strained with pain, yet he continued to try and force Jude off of him, push himself upright, only to have his shoulder give from the effort. He collapsed back to the floor, splatters of blood landed on Jude's clothing, much to the boy's horror. "Get Gaius and warn him. If that thing gets turned on…"

"I'm not leaving you to die!" Jude protested, channeling faster, pouring more mana into the man's damaged body. A voice in the back of his head asked why he was giving such an effort to save him after Alvin had just handed him over to the enemy, but he quickly silenced any protests. Even if Alvin had betrayed him, he was doing it for a reason he believed in, and that alone would not allow Jude to just abandon him.

He could feel himself losing strength, growing dizzy from having to pour so much of his own energy into the healing process. So hard was he concentrating that he didn't notice Gilland had come for him, hoisting him up by his arm before grasping his neck, holding him at arm's length with the barrel of his gun aimed straight at Jude's head.

"Hand it over, boy." Gilland seethed, pressing the muzzle against Jude's cheek. "If you cooperate, I may even let you continue that little project of yours…" The grin upon the man's face widened almost sadistically as he watched Alvin try to pick himself up off the ground again, attempting to reach his pistol. "Or… Is it this dog you want?" Gilland kicked Alvin's weapon out of reach, laughing darkly as the injured man cursed.

"You… You _monster…_ " Jude brought a hand up to grasp Gilland's wrist, trying to loosen his hold on him. "You never intended to let us out of here alive, did you?"

The mouth of the gun was pressed tauntingly against Jude's cheek as Gilland sniggered, as if taking delight in the boy's dismay. "It's as I said… Alfred wished to redeem himself, and I am offering that redemption. And once my plan is complete, _your_ continued existence is… Of _little_ consequence."

Jude continued to struggle against his grip, knowing that one false move would spell the end of him, Alvin, or them both. His eyes darted around the room, taking in every detail of their surroundings, including Alvin's desperate attempts at reaching his weapon as he bled onto the floor. He needed a plan, some way to stop all this madness and get the both of them out of there safely. If he could just somehow buy some time, wait for Gaius and the others to catch up…

"If… If I give you the disc, will you let Alvin go?" Jude managed as his flow of air was threatened by Gilland's grip. "You'll let me heal him and let him go?"

"Jude, _no_." Alvin protested, already struggling for breath with the wounds inflicted upon him. They both knew he would not last long without proper care.

Gilland hummed in appreciation of Jude's offer, his grip loosening ever so slightly. "You would bargain for this wounded dog? The one who has done nothing but lie to you for his own gain?" The gun was aimed at Alvin again and Gilland cocked it slowly without so much as looking the man's way. A threat; motivation for Jude to keep his end of the bargain.

It was working.

Jude gulped and nodded, hand still firmly on the disc. This may be his only chance. "Then… I'll give it to you." He affirmed, slowly raising it into Gilland's view. "But before I do… There's one thing I want to know." He locked eyes with the man, glaring as the gun remained trained on Alvin as he struggled to reach his own weapon. "What was the point of all this? Why the ruse? Why not just have Alvin bring the disc and be done with it? Why go through all the trouble of gathering a small army on a remote ship?"

At his question, Gilland sneered. "It's quite simple." And then, a low snicker, as if he was laughing at his own sick joke. "You're the fuel."

The bottom dropped out of Jude's stomach and his eyes went wide with shock. "We're… Fuel?"

Gilland laughed through his nose, an absolutely maniacal glint to his eyes. "It is true that your research played a vital role in the completion of the Lance of Kresnik. Our previous attempts failed _miserably_ because we simply had no way of powering such a massive device reliably. With yours and Haus's research, we discovered a way to jumpstart the system, so to speak."

"You… You can't mean…"

"That's right. Once I activate the Lance of Kresnik, every living being on board will be sapped of their mana and used to fire its maiden round, striking the cities of Rieze Maxia." As he spoke his voice remained steady, not once fluctuating even as he spoke of destroying an entire civilization. "Once it hits, their mana will be sapped dry. It'll be enough to power the lance again, and again and again _and again_ until _all_ of Rieze Maxia is reduced to ash, and _all_ that mana will be absorbed."

Jude slowly shook his head, the sheer horror of what he had just been told robbing him of his resolve. "Then the target for the Otherworld Reactor Project wasn't to absorb the spirits' mana…!"

Gilland was practically elated as he barked a laugh, tugging Jude closer with such force that he almost lost his footing altogether, as if he wished to experience his dismay more thoroughly. "That's right. Why waste the effort of trapping spirits when there's enough mana in those Rieze Maxian scum alone to power Elympios for thousands of years to come?"

"You…" Jude breathed, finding it hard to keep his calm after all this new information had come to light. "You really think you can get away with this? With killing off an entire continent?!"

"Oh, but…" Gilland pulled his gun back just so he could hold Jude a sparse three inches from his face just for effect. " _I already have…_ "

Jude watched him, fear playing across his eyes as he heard a gun click not far from him.

And then, he scowled. "Not yet, you haven't!"

With one swift motion Jude's forehead collided with Gilland's, knocking him back and loosing his grip upon Jude's neck. His gun fired, narrowly missing where Alvin lay, penetrating the floor and sending cracks spiderwebbing through the glass. Alvin rolled onto his side, using his uninjured arm to hold his gun steady as he fired a shot at Gilland's weapon, knocking the gun from his grasp.

With their enemy disarmed, Jude quickly attempted to overpower him, using swift punches and kicks to wear him down, utilizing every lesson he had ever been taught in a miraculous display of agility and strength.

It appeared that Gilland was not as strong as his nephew, as it took little time for Jude to gain the upper hand, backing his enemy further towards the platform as he waited for Alvin to reload for the finishing blow. Jude reared back, switching stances and preparing to give another round of punches to further wear down their enemy. He didn't suspect a thing when Gilland reached into his cloak, hand disappearing for a brief moment before appearing again with a glint of light off a gilded barrel and a sudden flash of gunfire.

He never expected the searing pain that ripped through his abdomen like a heated blade, nor the breath to be stolen from him so suddenly that he could scarcely cry out. His eyes sought out the source, finding it held firmly in Gilland's shaking hand. A second gun. Jude hadn't considered another weapon.

Seconds passed and Jude gagged, blood burbling up from his throat and into his mouth, dribbling down his chin. He stumbled back, a hand pressed against the wound that was already staining the clothing Alvin had picked for him with a deep crimson red. A breathless cry was ripped from his throat and Jude doubled over as the pain hit him all at once. His legs buckled and he fell to his knees, head swaying as the agony threatened to tear his consciousness from him.

"Jude!" He could barely hear Alvin calling for him over his pulse pounding in his ears. "Jude, heal yourself!" Alvin demanded from the cracked glass floor as he tried to drag himself towards Jude, as if he had any chance of protecting him when he was in a worse state himself.

His words at least registered, Jude closing his eyes and beginning to channel the last of his mana into healing his own wound. For a split second he thought it worked, only for the spell to fail, a feeling like fire singeing his hand as his body convulsed in protest, only further aggravating his condition. The distinct sensation of something being inside him that shouldn't made him feel like vomiting and it was everything he could do to keep from passing out.

Yet Jude continued to fight, holding a hand against his bleeding stomach as he struggled to his feet, refusing to give up.

And Gilland laughed. "Such determination! And all for naught!" He waltzed up to Jude and before he had a chance to fend him off, the disc was plucked from his pocket, and the injured boy knocked off balance with a mean-spirited shove. Gilland returned to the console, holding the disc high as he glanced over his shoulder at his defeated adversaries. "And now, the last act of our little performance."

The disc slid into the console with a mechanical whir, dozens of screens appearing onto the display. Gilland wasted no time in finding the executable file, setting his plan in motion with a simple press of a button.

All at once it felt like his weight had increased tenfold, Jude's already weakened body collapsing, brought down by an unseen force. He fell to the ground in a heap, the breath knocked from his lungs on impact and he could feel what little mana he had remaining being slowly drained from his person. This was it, the power of the Lance of Kresnik.

There was the distinct sound of another body hitting the ground nearby, Gilland cursing audibly, his voice strained to Jude's ears. As the boy struggled for breath he managed to lift his head enough to see Gilland sprawled upon the platform, seemingly unable to move just as he was. Was this the fate of everyone on the ship? Would they be drained of their mana and left to die, just like that?

"What… What are you…!" Jude posed the question of the delusional man, bewildered as to why he had not made his escape.

Gilland grunted, but grinned all the same. "A minor miscalculation." He muttered. "I need only withstand the lance's effects long enough for the first shot. Then, it will no longer matter. Whoever survives will return to Elympios with me and bask in glory as the heroes that restored our land's livelihood!"

So not even his own men were going to spared? How many soldiers were going to be sacrificed? How many did Gilland plan to kill for the sake of his insane mission?

 _No… No I can't let it end like this…!_ _All those people are going to die!_

But what could he do? Wounded, devoid of mana, weighed down as the machine absorbed all their energy so it could destroy his people…

 _That's it!_

With strength he was sure had left him already, Jude managed to roll onto his stomach, crawling, pulling himself along towards the steps, making his way to the platform and the console that resided upon it. _If I can just get to the console… I can…_

Bemused by his attempts, Gilland laughed from his place on the floor. "It's useless!" He shouted over the din of the lance. "Once it starts running, it will continue until the firing sequence is complete! You cannot stop it!"

"I'm going to _try_!" Jude shouted, unwilling to listen to anything else the man had to say. He continued to crawl up the steps, feeling weaker and weaker with each passing second. But he had to do this. He had to do _something_ or everyone in that room, the ship, and countless other people were going to die.

Perhaps it was the adrenaline, or some untapped strength he didn't know he possessed, but Jude somehow managed to hoist himself upright, his body wracked with pain from his wounds and the lance's power both. Finally he stood upon unsteady legs whilst leaning against the console, barely able to hold his head up to see the control panel's display. He keyed through the files left open by Gilland, scanning over the names, the command files there. _Something, anything, there has to be…_

Jude hovered over abort. _Abort the launch, abort the lance firing, but even if I do that, Gilland could just get up and try again, and the sequence would continue…_

He switched the cursor to the end of the list. _This won't end unless I destroy it… I have to destroy the Lance of Kresnik…!_

 _RUN ?__

 _YES_ NO__

"What are you doing?!" Gilland shouted, trying to sit up only for his strength to fail him. "If you do that, you'll decimate the ship! You'll doom us all!"

It was just what Jude needed to hear. With a weak but triumphant smile, he glanced over his shoulder to Gilland. "If that's what it takes, then…"

There was no hesitation as Jude pounded his fist against the key, a window full of string after string of code populating the screen as the lance made a jarring metallic noise. The code continued down the display until it stopped all together, a message taking its place.

 _MODULE OVERRIDE COMPLETED. SELF-DESTRUCT INITIATED__

 _EVACUATE AREA IMMEDIATELY_

A siren sounded that could be heard throughout the ship, one Jude hoped would be signal enough for the others to get as far away as possible. A timer appeared on the display;

 _90…89…88…_

The generators within the lance kicked into overdrive as more weight hit Jude, his arms only barely holding him upright as the force threatened to knock him down. "You fool!" Gilland shouted, his own voice strained from the lance's mana sapping force weighing down on him. "Do you realize what you've done?!"

Jude shook his head, what could he do? It was this, or the destruction of all of Rieze Maxia. The people here… They were going to get hurt, but what choice did he have?

He had no answer to offer Gilland. He merely watched as all the man's bravado was lost along with his master plan, crawling cowardly away as if to save himself.

Further out was Alvin, trying to get to his feet, blood coating his clothing, yet he seemed fixated on one thing. "Jude! Hurry up and get away from there!" He barked, arms threatening to buckle from the combined weight and effort. "There's still time, just get as far away as you can and save yourself!"

Jude heard his pleas and he understood. This had not been part of Alvin's plan either. He had intended to hand the disc over and make a grand escape with Jude at his side, leaving everyone else behind so they alone would survive. Or did he intend to take Gilland out at the last minute, swing in and rescue Jude from his fate?

A mystery that would remain, Jude thought as the strength left him and he collapsed against the console, unable to withstand the forces acting against him anymore.

 _65…64…63…_

"Jude, what are you doing!?" Alvin had given up trying to stand and instead was crawling for him, the glass floor beneath him cracking more and more with each passing second. "Get up! Get out of here!" His normally strong and charismatic voice was laced with abject terror, his eyes on Jude as he fought inch by inch to get closer to him. "C'mon, get up! Damn it, _just go!_ "

And Jude chuckled at the irony of it all, even as his body was coursed with pain, his body protesting his very breath. "I… I wanted to help people." He muttered, voice becoming weaker with each string of words. "I wanted… Everyone to live peacefully… So that's why… I have to do this…"

"Stop talking like that!" Alvin was yelling now, terrified. So close, yet so far. "Are you seriously going to sacrifice yourself?! Get up! There's still time!"

 _32…31…30…_

The sound of groaning and rending metal echoed through the grand hall, fixtures bending under the pressure of the lance. There was a distinct crack, the rusted ceiling panels beginning to buckle. The ship was falling apart.

Jude smiled sadly, more blood coating his lips, running down his chin. He didn't want his last vision of Alvin to be a fearful one. He wanted to remember the Alvin that was smiling, laughing, teasing him, holding him…

Trusting him… Loving him…

"I'm sorry, Alvin… And… Thank you…" With what little energy he rolled onto his stomach, slowly dragging his weakened body towards the stairs. He reached for Alvin, wanting to feel his touch just one last time. "Thank you… For…"

"That's it, come on!" Even now, Alvin was encouraging him, reaching for him. He was only a few feet away. "Just a bit more!"

 _Just a little closer… I want to touch him… Feel his hand once more…_

Jude recalled his cocky grin, the way Alvin would sling an arm around his shoulder. The feeling of warmth that filled his chest when Alvin would ruffle his hair, when he'd wink at him and make some off comment that'd make Jude blush.

"You're almost there! Come on, Jude! You can make it!"

 _Just once more…_

He remembered how safe he felt that time he carried him from the scene of the chemistry lab fire. How the fear left him when he was held close to Alvin's chest, how even when the world seemed too cruel, Alvin had been there for him.

 _15…14…13…_

Even if there had been lies, Alvin's actions rang true. Everything he had done, everything they had gone through, it was to protect Jude.

"Thank you… Alvin…"

Their fingertips brushed, the barest of contact.

"…For trusting me…"

The ceiling above them finally gave, chunks of metal debris falling all around them. The glass beneath Alvin finally shattered completely, sending the man falling deeper into the ship. In the final seconds of the explosion, Jude faintly registered Alvin calling his name, his voice fading as he fell.

The memory of his voice and the feeling of his fingertips on his own were the last things on his mind before his consciousness left him entirely.

The pain left his body as the world went white in a deafening roar.


	17. Chapter 17

Everything was quiet, peaceful.

He felt as though he was floating, unable to control his body, or what remained. Weightless, yet wholly unable to move, drifting aimlessly with the ebb and flow of an unseen tide. But Jude did not feel pain, the lack of discomfort both calming and alarming to him in his current state. He had been injured badly, hadn't he? Shot, bleeding out, caught in that explosion. He vaguely recalled fighting, falling, dying, death… He was dead, wasn't he? It felt… Not in any way he would have imagined. There was no fear, no dread to fill his chest, only all-encompassing darkness to engulf him.

Just nothing; a void, an abyss that wrapped him in cool arms as he continued drifting alone with only his scattered thoughts to occupy his time.

 _I wonder if the others were able to escape…_

 _Others_ , who all was there? There were people who were needed, ones he trusted, weren't there? Jude tried to place the faces, pin the names, and yet found he could not even recall who stood at his side in those final moments. Were they friends? Allies? Enemies? Mentally he reached for them, yet the more he tried the further away they felt, as if the very act of recalling them was too much for his already weakened consciousness to handle.

 _Were there others? Was there… Anyone? Has there ever been anyone?_

Jude tried to pull his head together, grasping for his thoughts, only to have them slip between his fingers as if he were grabbing at his own reflection in a pond. His home, his family, loved ones, the events that led to his demise… Everything that shaped him into the person he was, all dissipating, becoming one with the darkness around him, lost to the abyss.

The sensation that overcame him could only be described as fading, the very essence of his being coming undone, unraveling and taking everything he was with it. Soon, he realized, there would be nothing left of him; his soul would become one with the abyss, and that would be the end of it.

The "Jude" he was would cease to be.

This fact should have alarmed him, terrified him so deeply that he'd struggle, beg and plead to remain whole. And yet Jude didn't feel the need. He felt himself beckoned, pulled further and further into the infinite nothingness.

 _"Do not struggle."_

A voice carried across his thoughts, calming and child-like.

 _"I am here to end your pain, the suffering you endured in your life."_

 _My pain… Was I in pain? I can't…_

 _"Soon your soul will be cleansed and you will be created anew."_

 _Created anew… Oh, but… What will happen to me then?_

 _"Your rebirth, a new beginning. A new life to start again."_

 _I… That sounds… Nice…_

"Don't give in."

 _"Soon you will know no pain, no hardship…"_

 _I… I'd like that… I don't want to…_

"It is not your time to go."

 _"A chance to live happily, far removed from those who have hurt you before…"_

 _I… I don't want to be hurt anymore… I want…_

 __"Don't you have a mission to fulfill?"

A sudden flash and Jude was no longer floating, instead lying curled upon something cool and hard. The ground, he realized, but try as he might he hadn't the strength to open his eyes and survey the area around him. He sensed someone nearby, no, several someones, all standing around him where he lay.

The echoing clack of heels against stone, the shuffling of fabric, and then, a soft touch, fingers tracing across his jaw line. Was the void brighter? Had it been bright all along?

"You're a strange human, aren't you?" The voice, a woman, spoke tersely as she sat at his side. "Struggling to gain the trust of others, yet you continue striving to help the people who harmed you."

 _Strange…_ Jude repeated in his own head, unable to speak just yet. _I guess that is strange._

"I must ask you." The woman began again, a gloved hand resting against his shoulder. "Why was it you tried so hard for people who cared so little? They destroyed their world, then sought aid from you without a single ounce of thanks." Her voice was stern, the faintest hint of malice. "Would it not be easier to let them live with their mistakes? To save yourself the heartache such endeavors wrought?"

"That's…" Jude mumbled, his voice slowly coming back to him. "I… I wasn't asking for thanks… I just…" Just what? The woman was right; it would have been so much easier to have just dropped the project after Professor Haus died. No one would have blamed him for wanting out after watching his mentor murdered. Or when he was attacked in the square, or his apartment broken into… So many times he could have quit, left the work for someone else and avoided all the pain he had gone through, and not a single person would wrong him for it. He was just a kid, a scared kid who just wanted to do right.

But that was just it, wasn't it? He wanted to do right. He wanted to _help_ and that was why he stayed. It didn't matter that no one thanked him, nor that people still scorned him for being a Rieze Maxian in Elympios. He just wanted… "…I wanted to help them. The Elympions… They're afraid to lose the life they know… And… Even if they're afraid of me… I want to help them… So we…" People flitted across his mind, faces that started to come into view, names like whispers in his ears. Memories, emotions, the reasons, his _mission_.

"I want to help… So everyone… can live peacefully…"

That was his mission.

Something feather soft ghosted across his face, tickling his nose, and the woman laughed quietly. "You truly love this world, don't you?"

Jude couldn't tell if he was smiling, so unsure was he of his own form in that moment. "Yes… I do love this world…"

He felt himself lifted into warm arms, his face nestled against the woman's bosom, like a mother would a child. "That is what I wished to hear…" Lips pressed against his forehead, a warmth unlike any he had felt before radiating from the touch. After another small struggle, Jude finally cracked his eyes open. The world was too bright, nearly blinding, but he could just make out the face of the person holding him. Blonde hair, brilliant eyes, a knowing smile. Jude knew not her name, but his heart leapt at the very image. Beautiful, enough so to be a goddess…

"You…"

She silenced him one gloved finger against his lips. "It's time to go back, Jude." The arms left him, yet he did not fall as the world around him began to fade again. "I look forward to the day that you restore balance to that world."

Jude reached for her, hand just barely caressing the woman's as he fell. He called out, wanting answers; who was she, where was she going, what was going to happen to him. But his voice had abandoned him once more.

As the world went out around him, she just smiled, fading too as she spoke her last words;

"Do not forget your mission."

He felt his body being yanked violently, swept up in the forces of the tide, and the pain hit him so suddenly that he gasped, choking on saltwater and brine.

Then, nothing.

His head hurt.

That was the first thought that entered Jude's mind as he blinked into waking, eyes trying to focus on his surroundings as they came into view. A shelf overstuffed with books against the wall, family photos set on the side table, depicting a mother and child smiling happily. A window adorned with white curtains, swaying gently with the ocean breeze, the sound of seagulls coming in from the coast…

Leronde.

Home.

He was home.

He was _alive_.

Jude lifted his hand to touch his forehead, a task that was proving far more difficult than he originally anticipated. He noted bandages along his arms, more wrapped about his head. And if the tightness around his stomach was any indication, he had plenty more there as well. His injuries had been seen to, but the questions remained; where were the others? How did he survive? That woman… Did she have something to do with this?

"You're awake."

Jude jolted, head whipping to the side almost too fast for his vision to keep up. Sitting upon a chair next to the bed was Presa, dressed much more conservatively than last he saw her. But unlike last time, she didn't wear that teasing, all-knowing grin, but a grave look of concern aimed his way.

"I'm…" Jude pressed at his forehead, trying to calm the ache that was already threatening to worsen with the effort of speaking alone. "I'm… How did I…"

"Your answer is as good as mine. To be honest, we thought you were lost when the lance self-destructed." Presa rose to her feet, grabbing a remote from the shelf and clicking on the small television set that had been placed on the desk. From his spot on the bed Jude could just barely see a news program, photos of smoking debris floating along with the tides taken from an airship, the ticker reading _'Terrorist Attack Thwarted: Spirius Under Fire'_.

"This is all that's been on since the incident. Elympions do so love their scandals…" Presa set the remote down, taking a seat once again. "You were fortunate to have survived at all. The explosion decimated half the ship in an instant. We were able to evacuate using a commandeered airship, but…"

She turned her head to watch the news feed, a clip of Bisley Bakur being escorted from the Spirius building, dozens of reports clamoring to him, shoving microphones in his face. The headline ' _CEO Bakur Under Exodus Influence?'_ scrolled just beneath. It cut to a clip of Chancellor Ilbert giving a speech, the Prime Minister of Elympios at his side. Camera flashes lit up the room as he answered questions about the current situation between the two nations, to discuss if the open border was to continue, or if the foiled attack was considered an act of war. Thankfully the esteemed strategist seemed to be handling the situation gracefully, assuring the press that there was currently no intention to retaliate so long as justice would be served. The Prime Minister added that they intended to cooperate fully in this regard.

The reel cut back to the wrecked ship, or what was left of it. It had been reduced to scraps floating atop the water, the vessel itself likely having sunk to the bottom of the sea. Seeing only made Jude wonder just how he made it out alive.

If anyone _else_ in that room did.

"How did I… How did I live through that? I was…" Shot, bleeding, his mana almost entirely depleted thanks to the lance. For all intents and purposes, he should have been dead.

Presa shook her head, her gaze surprisingly gentle for someone who only a short time ago had acted so coldly to him. "We're not entirely sure ourselves. You were found washed up on shore near Sapstrath. Your injuries were… Not light, and your lack of mana has hindered your recovery."

Jude nodded along, trying to process what she was saying. Those final moments seemed so surreal; the lance, that crazed man's grand scheme, the fight… But as he fought to piece the timeline together it became more garbled, less cohesive, until he could only recall the pain and the sound of a voice tell him not to give up, the soft touch of Alvin's fingers before he…

"Alvin!" Jude bolted upright and immediately regretted it as a pulse of pain emanated from his stomach, causing him to double over. Alvin. Alvin was there with him. He had been trying to reach him, telling him to run, that he could still escape… But the floor collapsed, the ship blew… Jude looked to Presa, wanting, no, _needing_ answers. "Alvin, where is he?"

The woman's expression fell and she got to her feet again, seeking something just out of Jude's view. She returned a moment later with a familiar jacket, torn and stained with blood.

Suddenly Jude felt the urge to vomit and cry all at once, and he clapped a hand over his mouth to hopefully prevent both. _No, he… He couldn't…_ Tears stung at the corners of his eyes, shoulders shaking as he slowly reached for the jacket, pulling it into his lap. The smell of his cologne had been completely washed away, replaced by the pungent smell of sand and brine. But it was unmistakably his, the custom tailoring, the unique pattern, the bloodstains and burn marks…

"When you were found, you were wrapped in that."

Jude's head jolted up at those words, fretful eyes staring in shock. "When I was…" It took him unusually long to process this information. This was the jacket Alvin was wearing on the ship when Gilland attacked them, so… "Then, Alvin is…"

Presa shook her head, taking a seat once more. "He wasn't there when we arrived. We searched but…" Her expression grew somber again and Jude knew what she was trying to convey. Alvin was gone. Missing, possibly dead. His wounds had been terrible, hadn't they? Unable to walk, desperately crawling to him in those final moments even though escape was completely futile. The terror in his voice rang in Jude's ears even now; more than anything, Alvin didn't want him to give in, he wanted him to _live_ even if he was convinced he'd die himself in the process.

And perhaps he had.

But as Jude's arms wrapped around the musty fabric, a soft smile crossed his lips. Even when faced with death, Alvin had still thought of his safety, wanting to protect him even if it meant losing his own life.

A tear slipped down his cheek and Jude made no attempt to wipe it away as he held the fabric to his chest. _You took the bodyguard cover to heart, didn't you, Alvin?_

A deceptively delicate hand was laid upon his shoulder, giving Jude a reassuring squeeze. "That man always wanted to go out in style." Presa muttered, seemingly lost as to how to comfort this boy over a man she once loved herself. "But you know, Al is too stubborn to just _die_."

Jude snorted, wiping at his tears, smiling all the same. "I know. He… He had said he was going to leave when this was done…" He sniffled, eyes falling to the jacket in his lap. "I just have to trust that he'll find what he needs to, and that he'll come back someday."

Presa's hand fell away from his shoulder, seeming surprised at Jude's response. "You believe that he'll come back?" Though she didn't say it, Jude knew what she really wanted to ask: _You believe he'll come back to you?_

He could only nod, lifting his head and holding it high. "I know he will, when he's found the 'Alvin' he wants to be, and accepted the 'Alvin' that he is now."

For a moment Presa stared, unable to find any witty retort to counter Jude's words. An unfamiliar emotion flickered across her expression before she smiled, slowly rising to her feet again. "Hm… I feel like I should concede to you, Jude." She made her way to the door, sliding it open. "Good work."

"Huh?" What was that supposed to mean?

But before he could ask for clarity, the door to his room slammed the rest of the way open as Leia made her entrance. She pushed past Presa and all but pounced Jude, wrapping him in a tight hug. "You're awake!" She proclaimed, already near tears. "I'm so glad you're okay!"

"L-Leia… It hurts…!" Jude managed with gritted teeth. Leia wasn't that heavy, but the pressure on his stomach was enough to send him reeling all over again.

"Oh!" She loosened her grip, smiling at him as she fought back tears. "You big idiot! First you disappear and then I get a call saying they found you half-dead! Do you have any idea how worried I was?"

Jude chuckled, reaching up to pat her head with one bandaged hand. "I'm sorry, Leia. A lot of things happened…"

"I'll say! You better tell me everything! Every. Last. Detail." She pulled out her notebook from seemingly thin-air and began hastily writing. "This is gonna be a _huge_ scoop!"

"Leia…" Jude sighed, reaching back to prop up the pillows so he could lay more comfortably. Even though he had just woken he was already feeling drained, the excitement alone leaving him feeling utterly exhausted. "Wait till I'm on my feet again, then I'll give you your scoop."

The tone of his voice seemed to be enough to get his point across, as Leia set the notebook aside and instead took the seat Presa was occupying before. "Sorry, I probably should have asked with an easier question. Like, how are you feeling? Can I get you anything?"

Jude shook his head, his attention going to the latest news segment, this one with a headline even closer to home. _'Spyrix Research Suspended Pending Investigation'_.

"Guess I'm out a job…" He sunk further into the pillows, reaching for the remote and clicking the TV off. Jude figured it would end up like this, and he was fairly certain that his short-lived career as a researcher was swiftly coming to an end. He wondered what he would do next; continue school? Pick up a different job? Move back home? He couldn't afford an apartment in Trigleph on financial aid alone, so it seemed that moving back home was soon to be his only option.

Leia placed a reassuring hand on his knee. "Hey, we'll figure something out…" She offered with a smile.

Jude nodded, pulling the jacket closer to his chest. Even though it smelled too much of salt and iron, it brought him no small comfort to have the article so close. Alvin's final act of kindness before his departure was to offer him warmth, give him whatever he could to keep him safe. Even if he felt he was no longer worthy of staying at Jude's side, Alvin still wished to protect him.

And now Jude could only hope he would come back someday.

The silence between them was broken by a growl from Jude's stomach, causing the heat to rush to his face. But Leia gave him no grief, only smiled. "Hungry?"

Jude nodded, trying to adjust the blankets to more properly cover his bare chest. In the end, Leia had to do it for him, setting Alvin's coat to his side in the process. "Do you think your dad would make me that soup I like? With the oranges?"

"I'm sure he will!" She leapt to her feet with renewed vigor. "I'll go help him make it and be right back, so sit tight, okay?"

"I don't think I could go anywhere if I tried…" Jude snarked, but it was only met with a playful smile. He was grateful to have Leia around, especially now.

But something had been bothering since he woke. That woman, the one that had spoken to him before… "Hey, Leia, was there someone else here? Aside from you and Presa?"

"Hm?" Leia pressed a finger to her chin in thought. "I don't think so? Your mother is overseeing your treatment. Is that who you saw?"

Jude shook his head. "No, that's…" It wasn't anyone he recognized, but he felt like the woman was _familiar_ somehow, like an old friend. But he was sure he had never seen her before. "Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure?"

Jude smiled. "Yeah. Don't worry about it. Tell mom I'm awake on your way out?"

"You bet! I'll be back in a hot minute."

As soon as she left to fetch his meal, Jude immediately missed her presence. Alone in the quiet of the room, Jude's only company was his thoughts, those of which he needed to sort through before he could figure out his next move. Exodus in shambles, his job on an indefinite hiatus, Alvin gone…

He sighed, fiddling with the button of one of Alvin's jacket's pockets, noticing a familiar lump. He undid the fastener and pulled Alvin's GHS free, rich brown accented with gold paint that had chipped off over time. Curiously, he flipped it open, attempting to power it on. It buzzed menacingly but otherwise did not respond. The seawater likely did it in with no hopes of recovery. But there was something else that caught Jude's eye, something metallic that had slipped from the pocket along with the phone.

A charm in the shape of a six-pointed flower with a small stylized J at the center, attached to a keyring. On it was a single key, one that Jude recognized. The apartment that Alvin and he shared for that brief time. _This key… Did he make it for me before…?_

Jude clutched the key to his chest, smiling to himself. In that moment, for all the uncertainties he held in his heart, he decided what it was he needed to do. He'd keep moving forward for himself, hold tightly to the mission he undertook for the sake of the people of this world. _I'll keep moving… And finish what I started no matter what._

And maybe, just maybe, he'd see Alvin again.


	18. Chapter 18

"It's been a while, hasn't it?"

At a small café in Trigleph, Jude sat cupping his second mug of coffee with both hands. He looked up to greet his guest, smiling in spite of his fatigue. Ludger took a seat across from him, appearing just as tired as he was, but smiling all the same.

"Yeah, our work schedules aren't exactly merciful on our sleep cycles, are they?" Jude laughed, running a hand through his hair, chuckling to himself. "But at least I'm not running around chasing suspects all day. I'm just in the lab."

"To be honest, I think I'd prefer chasing suspects. I've seen the way you work." The waitress came over and poured Ludger a cup of coffee, which he gladly began adding creamer to. "But after receiving all that private funding, I can see why you'd put so much into it."

Jude took a sip of his own drink, his body craving the caffeine after pulling an all-nighter to meet his deadline. "Yeah, it just felt like there was a lot more at stake when we had the chancellor start handing us checks. Talk about nerve-wracking."

Ludger idly stirred his coffee, resting his chin in his free hand. "Didn't she make a big PR deal out of it too? Not sure what her motive is, but at least the funds are clean. You wouldn't believe how disorganized things are still with _half_ our directors missing."

"Even after all this time? I would have thought Julius would have things under control by now…"

A heavy silence fell over them, Ludger's hand stilling over his coffee as his expression fell. "Actually… That's one of the reasons things are so crazy. Julius quit."

"What?" Jude blinked in shock. Julius had been the director of Ludger's department for years, and one of the few that stayed on board after the Exodus investigation. He was dedicated to his job almost as much as he was his brother. To hear he just _left_ … "But why?"

Ludger gulped thickly, pushing his coffee to the side as he rested his elbows on the table. "He's gotten sicker, and it has been affecting his work. He thought it was time."

Jude lowered his gaze, sorrow welling in his chest. He knew Julius's condition had been rapidly worsening, but the man insisted on working because he wanted to support Ludger. It was only a matter of time before he wasn't able to push through the pain anymore. Jude felt for them; the brothers were close, and Julius was the only family Ludger had left. "I'm sorry, Ludger. I wish there was something I could do to help but… None of my spyrites can cure what he has."

The agent quickly shook his head, dyed hair falling into his eyes as he offered Jude a somber smile. "That's not why I called you out here. I know you did what you could when you came to see him last, and we're both grateful for it." A pause, another sip of coffee, before Ludger set it aside again. "I'm leaving Spirius, too."

"You too?!" Jude sputtered. Things had been hard, and yes, the corruption had certainly tainted the public view of the conglomerate, but "I thought you always wanted to be an agent? To follow your brother's footsteps?"

Ludger chuckled through his nose, as if he had expected this reaction of Jude. "It was, yeah. But after doing the work, seeing what I _had_ to do for the sake of my job… My heart just wasn't in it after that time in Duval. I think Julius leaving was the last straw."

"I see…" Jude wasn't sure how he felt about that. On the one hand, he felt responsible for involving Ludger in that mess, tainting his view of the company. But on the other he almost felt relieved; Ludger was skilled in combat, but he was kind, almost too kind for all the dirty work he was having to do in the name of Spirius. This led to another question. "What do you plan on doing then? If Julius isn't working either, then…"

The pale man smiled, brushing the stray bangs from his face. "The barkeep of _Café_ _Noir_ offered me a job as a cook. I've always enjoyed cooking, so I figured it'd be a good place to start. It's a huge pay cut, but…"

"But it's something you'd enjoy doing, isn't it?" Of all people, Jude knew exactly how it felt to have a job he loved and very little funds to show for it. It was hard, but far more fulfilling way of life. That, and Ludger's cooking was already restaurant quality in Jude's opinion. Why not make a career of it? "If it's something you want to do, then I'm glad for it. Just let me know if there's anything I can do to help, okay?"

A firm nod, another winning smile. "You'll just have to come down to Duval more often to have dinner from now on."

The two shared a much needed laugh. It had been a couple weeks since they had been able to sit down and enjoy each other's presence. Between Ludger's ever increasing workload due to the shortage of agents and Jude's research deadlines ever looming over his head, the two had hardly time for themselves, let alone visiting. But Ludger had left Spirius, and Jude had finally pushed his last prototype out to the field lab for testing. Now they could rest, and enjoy a few moments for themselves and their loved ones.

"How's things with Gai- I mean, Erston?" Jude ventured, searching for a topic of conversation that was far removed from their jobs. It was strange to think that a casual friendship with the ruler of his homeland was one of the end results of the Exodus ordeal. It was still a little scary speaking so plainly to the king, but Gaius had proved to be an honest and reliable friend. That, and he clearly adored Ludger, which was really all Jude hoped for in the end.

A heavy blush crossed Ludger's cheeks and he averted his gaze. "They're going well, I think. He's always busy with his royal duties, but he always takes time out to visit." He gave a nervous chuckle as his eyes returned to Jude. "He said if anything happens, he'd provide for me. I don't want it to come to that, but the offer _is_ tempting."

"A king providing for you… Isn't that a bit like being a concubine?"

The blush only worsened. "D-don't say it like that. It makes it worse!"

This time Jude chuckled, waving a hand to calm his friend. "I'm joking. But I'm glad things are going good. Erston is the kind of guy to speak bluntly, so it's easy to see what he thinks of you."

"Yeah." Ludger said, mind clearly drifting to his lover, judging by the grin on his face. Jude tried not to laugh. He was happy for them, but also a little envious. They had been together for a while, and Ludger always looked so _happy_ whenever he was around. For someone who was going through so much, it was nice to see Ludger genuinely smiling again.

It reminded him of a time he genuinely smiled for someone else. Such memories made his face fall, his previously contented expression fading.

"It's been two years, hasn't it?" Jude snapped to attention at Ludger's expression, the man's own face conveying the concern he felt for his friend. "Have you gotten anything from him?"

Jude lowered his eyes, slowly shaking his head. Without prompting, he knew exactly who Ludger was talking about. "No… Nothing."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't…"

"No, it's…" Jude was quick to cut off any apologies. Ludger had been friends with him too, it was only natural for him to ask. "It's fine. I just have to keep waiting."

"All this time though?" Ludger sounded genuinely surprised. "You'd think he'd at least send a letter or something…"

Jude knew what he was getting at; the person he was waiting for all this time… "I know, but he has to come back eventually, right?" Jude didn't quite believe his own words, but he voiced them anyway if only to keep himself going. "I'd be satisfied just knowing he was okay. So I'll just wait for him." A lie, a boldfaced lie, but this was something he had kept to himself. Ludger didn't need to know his feelings, how he was beginning to doubt the man would return, that he was even still alive. Voicing these fears would only give them validity, a place in reality, and Jude wasn't ready for that.

He wasn't sure if he ever would be.

Ludger reached across the table and gripped his hand, offering a sympathetic smile to his friend. They had grown so much closer since Jude's return to Rieze Maxia. Ludger had become Jude's confidante, his support when things get rough. And in return Jude had offered the same. In another time, Jude thought they would have probably ended up together, but Ludger had Gaius, and himself...

"I'm sorry." Ludger spoke, thumb running across the back of Jude's hand. "I shouldn't have brought it up."

Jude placed his other hand atop Ludger's, smiling as brilliantly as he could muster. "It's fine. I'm okay. Just gotta focus on work, right?" Another boldfaced lie and they both knew it, but Ludger wasn't about it point it out.

Ludger's phone went off and he pulled his hands away, retrieving the device from his pocket to check the message received. "It's from Erston, we're meeting up in Duval. Do you want to come? It's been a while since we all got to relax together."

With a laugh, Jude raised his hand to decline. "No, I still have a report to write up. Next time, okay?"

The phone was pocketed and Ludger stood, leaving some gald on the table for his drink. "All right, but call if you need something? Leia's been worried about you, too."

Jude nodded, feigning the smile as best as he could. "Of course. Same to you, though. I know it's rough with Julius's condition."

A hand was placed on Jude's shoulder, a familiar gesture. "Thanks, Jude. I'll call you later." He waved before heading in the direction of the station, leaving Jude alone to pay his end of the tab.

With a sigh, he stood, shelling out some gald before grabbing his bag and heading towards his apartment.

* * *

Over the course of the years, the near-empty apartment had evolved into something resembling a home. There still wasn't much in the way of decor; the living room was still mostly empty, with a few plants and a pair of lamps being the only new editions. What odds and ends he recovered from his old place had been brought over with the aid of Ludger and Leia. His bookshelves were set up in his room, his computer placed upon a desk. The room itself was still bordering on becoming a disaster area, but Jude did his best to keep it contained to just the bedroom and not let it spread into the living area. Maybe it was for the sake of bettering himself, or maybe it was because he wouldn't want anyone to see the apartment entrusted to him destroyed by his negligence.

Jude set the stack of mail he had gathered upon the kitchen counter and began sorting through it. Junk mail, bill, newsletter, bill, a notice from the landlord… He opened the notice first, feeling his pulse rise with the anxiety over what information the envelope could contain. He quickly glanced over the text; a thank you for a timely payment followed by a confirmation that his rent had been drawn from the account successfully, his dwindling gald balance following.

 _Only a few months left…_ Jude sighed, setting the letter aside and leaving the rest of the mail for later. Every month it was the same; the rent was pulled from account that Jude had no knowledge of save for its mention on the monthly notices. He had asked the lady down at the office at one point, only to have her shrug and say that the lessee had made a lump sum payment in lieu of a background check when he moved in some years back. But the amount was finite, and though Jude was doing his best to be conservative with water and electricity, the funds were drying up and he had no earthly way of affording such a luxurious place on his own.

It would be no small task to leave, financially, physically, and mentally. Though he had used the last two years of free rent to save every extra bit of gald he had, it was still only enough to cover the move and maybe a month or two of rent. Ludger had offered him a place to stay, but his apartment was a two bedroom shared between himself and his ailing brother; hardly enough space for a third person with a veritable library of materials he needed to keep. Leia offered as well, but the same issue arose.

The three had suggested finding a roommate to share the space; it was a nice apartment in a great part of town. He could easily split the cost and afford to keep it even on his researcher's budget. But Jude turned that idea down right off; moving out wasn't a desirable option, but having someone else live with him was just as bad. It wasn't that he didn't want to share the apartment; he'd probably enjoy having someone else's presence to drown out the silence. No, having someone else move _in_ meant moving stuff _out_ of the master bedroom. Stuff that wasn't _his_ to move. Stuff that belonged to _Alvin_.

Since his return to the apartment, the bedroom had remained largely untouched. Every now and then Jude would dust the furniture, open the window to air out the room. The pillows were fluffed, the blankets and sheets changed in time with the seasons. On the nightstand, the brown and gold GHS, still unable to power on, the ports corroded beyond repair. Everything remained as it was when Alvin and he still shared the home.

Mary called it waiting. Balan called it a memorial.

Jude wandered into the bedroom, as he often did when lost in the thoughts of the man who turned his world on its head. He admired the many colorful scarves that were carefully hung inside his closet, ran his hands across the fine fabrics of the suit jackets of which Alvin had always been so proud. Jude paused at one near the back, familiar hues of violet and maroon, pulling it from the collection and into his arms.

Though the scent of the sea no longer lingered, Jude was never able to get the bloodstains out of the expensive fabric. They remained, outlining the punctures in the cloth, the burnt edges of holes. Every time Jude looked at that jacket, he wondered if it was really possible for Alvin to have survived such horrific injuries. Jude himself had been shot once, and that was enough to put him down for a good month, but Alvin… He had taken no less than three shells. It seemed impossible for either of them to have survived, but Jude had been saved, found wrapped in that very jacket.

But Alvin was long gone when Jude had been found. And the more time passed, the more difficult it was to believe the man would return at all.

Jude wanted to believe in his words that day, that Alvin would come back when he had settled whatever score with whoever he needed to, whether it'd be an enemy or himself. But to go so long with nothing, he found he was losing hope.

Jude pulled his GHS from his pocket, staring blankly at the screen. It had taken months to recover the phone numbers lost when his old handset was destroyed, and even now he was still missing some. At the top of the contact list was Alvin's name, the number obtained from Leia. It went to voicemail for the first few months, now only leading to a generic out of service message. Looking back, Jude wished he had recorded the message on the machine, if only he could hear his voice again. But even if it always led to nothing, Jude would still call the number every now and again on the off chance that he'd get an answer, that he'd hear the familiar chuckle followed by "Hey, kid".

It was fruitless, Jude knew, but he still tried even if it hurt. It was hard hanging on, but even harder to let go. And for all his optimism, as the days passed with no word, Jude knew eventually he'd have to come to terms with Alvin's death.

With a ragged sigh Jude laid upon the unused bed, curling up with the jacket held tightly to his chest. He knew he had work to do, reports to write, dinner to make, but at that moment he didn't feel like doing anything but to lay there and try not to cry.

 _Maybe it's time I let this place go… Maybe he… Really isn't coming back…_

As a tear slipped down his face his phone buzzed in his hand, startling him out of his thoughts. Jude quickly sat up, rubbing his eyes as he looked at the display. A number he didn't recognize, and after hours too. Normally Jude would still answer regardless of the time; one never knew when he'd be needed at the lab. But right now Jude needed a moment to himself. He really wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone.

The phone went silent again and Jude sighed, setting the device upon the nightstand to join Alvin's broken one. But no sooner had his fingers left the smooth plastic did it buzz once more, the display blinking '1 New Voice Message'.

 _Maybe there's something going on at the lab?_ Jude picked up his phone and dialed his voice mailbox, pressing the speaker to his ear.

" _You have one unheard message. First unheard message._ "

There was no voice at first, only the sound of the wind and the distant murmurs of a crowd. Jude was beginning to think that perhaps it was a wrong number, a pocket dial message that would stretch until the timer was up. It wasn't the first time such a thing had occurred, nor was it likely the last.

But then there was a long, exasperated sigh, followed by a voice that stole Jude's breath from his lungs.

" _It's been a while, hasn't it? I'm glad your number is still the same._ "

Jude nearly dropped the phone in shock. _Was that…? No, it can't be…!_

" _I know it's sudden but… I wanted to see you. I can't expect you to come after what I did, but…_ " A dry chuckle, another shaky sigh, as if the speaker had to swallow his own emotions before talking again. " _I'm at the park near your old place. I know I can't ask your forgiveness but… I'll be waiting there._ "

Jude had his shoes on and was out the door before the message ended. He ran like a man possessed, pushing through the evening crowds without even so much as an apology to the people he ran into. His mind was spinning. The message, the words, the voice, _his_ voice. Was it really him? Had he finally…?

His lungs burned, his legs hurt, he tripped no less than twice as he rushed from one end of the district to the other. But the pain was the furthest thing from his mind in that moment. Just a couple more blocks, a few short minutes and he'd be able to see with his own two eyes the man he had longed to see for the last two years. The man that he had begun to think was never going to return.

The sun had begun to set by the time he made it to the hill that led to his old apartment. His pace slowed, no longer able to ignore his fatigue as he approached the crest of the hill. Jude tried to catch his breath as the park came into view, the children having all gone home for the day, leaving the playground empty…

…Save for one man.

As Jude stood at the entrance fighting for breath, he laid eyes upon broad shoulders, sun-kissed skin, brunette locks that reached just past his collar. His eyes were tired, worn from countless days away from home. The smile that graced his lips was tentative at best, but still undoubtedly Alvin's.

It was him.

It was really him.

Alvin threw up a hand in a half-hearted wave, trying to appear confident but only managing to look more unsure of himself. "Long time, no see, huh?"

As Jude fought for his breath he couldn't help but stare in disbelief. After so long, the countless nights of loneliness, the endless what-ifs, the gradually fading hope that the man who had changed so many aspects of his life was even alive at all, would ever return… The sorrow, the anger, the grief, the wish just to hear the man's voice, to know he was all right, even if he never got to see him again…

All these emotions bubbled to the surface so swiftly that Jude did the first thing that came to mind.

He gritted his teeth, biting back tears as he rushed up to the man, fist raised.

"You _bastard_!" His fist collided with Alvin's cheek so swiftly that the man was knocked flat on his back with a surprised yelp.

Alvin laid there a moment, groaning as he sat up. "Okay, I probably deserved that."

Jude was on him before he had a chance to get to his feet, straddling his lap and holding him still with two fists tangled in his scarf. "You deserve a lot more than that!" He spat, trying so hard to keep his emotions in check but was quickly failing in that department. "Do you have any idea what you've put me through?! I spent all this time holding out hope that you'd come back, only to watch the months pass with no calls, no messages, no letters, _nothing_! Do you have any idea how much it hurt watching everyone give up on you? Feeling like I should give up too? You were _dead_ , Alvin!"

"Jude, I…"

"Shut up!" Jude snapped, squeezing his eyes shut, trying to control his breathing. _Don't cry, Mathis. Don't you_ dare _cry right now!_ But even as his mind screamed not to, Jude was finding it hard to stave off the tears that were gathering in his eyes as he confessed all his pains from the last two years. "I _saw_ how injured you were! The ship blew up! They didn't even recover Gilland's body! They kept saying you couldn't have survived, that you probably crawled back into the water to die alone like some _animal_ that didn't deserve a burial. And I… I didn't want to believe they were right but…"

A thumb brushed across his eye, wiping the beginnings of a tear away. And when he opened his eyes all he saw was Alvin smiling sadly back at him and it was all Jude could do to keep from breaking down completely.

"I'm sorry, kid." He began, and for once Alvin didn't try to avoid his gaze. "I know I should have contacted you sooner. Bad on my part. I just…" He sighed, pressing his forehead against Jude's as his arms wrapped around the younger man's shoulders. "I couldn't. I just couldn't, knowing how much shit I put you through."

While Jude did not fight the embrace, he didn't reciprocate either. Instead he let his arms go limp, taking measured breaths to calm himself. "You think you were sparing me somehow? You thought I was better with you gone? Don't you remember what I said on the _Zenethra_?"

"But… That was before…"

"I said to stop assuming what I wanted!" He was shouting again, his voice getting away from him. "Maybe I _am_ better off without you. Maybe I _don't_ know what I'm getting into. But _I'm_ making that decision, not _you_. And what _I_ wanted was for you to _come back safe_!" Jude slowly wrapped his arms around Alvin's middle, hugging him tightly as if he was going to disappear at any moment, burying his face in his shoulder. "I wanted you to come back to _me_."

"Jude…" As Jude's shoulders shook, Alvin's embrace tightened around them. "After all I've done, the things I did... I lied to you, hurt you, I could have _killed_ you… You know all this, but you still…" He sighed, shaking his head as if his own resolve was crumbling with each word. "Why wait for someone as low as me? Why sell yourself short like that?"

Jude took a slow, deep breath before lifting his head, pulling back just enough to meet Alvin's gaze. "There was something Presa told me… The night before the _Zenethra…_ " This time it was Jude who pressed their foreheads together, hands resting against Alvin's chest. "Love is giving someone the power to destroy you, but trusting them not to." Alvin's breath hitched at the word love and he stared back at Jude in disbelief.

Jude could only smile in return. "And I trust you, Alvin."

There was the slightest quiver to Alvin's lip, a wavering in his expression. He quickly lowered his eyes, as if holding Jude's gaze was too much for him to handle in that moment. "You'd really want to be with a guy like me?"

"Let me decide that." And Jude smiled that same warm smile he had given to Alvin countless times before.

Alvin stared back, blinking slowly, leaning just the barest bit forward, pausing mere inches from Jude's lips, hesitant, unsure. It was Jude who closed the gap, pressing his lips against Alvin's own in a kiss that encompassed more than two years of yearning emotions and sleepless, lonely nights. Alvin responded slowly at first, then with fervor, holding Jude close as his own feelings poured from their contact.

They broke apart all too soon, Jude smiling even as his heart thundered in his ears. He rested his head against Alvin's shoulder, relishing the contact, the warmth of the man he had longed to see for the last two years.

"You're going to tell me everything." Jude demanded quietly. "Starting with what you've been doing all this time."

Alvin chuckled dryly, gently patting Jude on the back. "Aside from feeling lower than dirt and missing you?"

Jude reached up and gave Alvin a good knock on the back of the head. "Don't start. I'm being serious here."

"So am I." Alvin gently pushed at Jude's chest, coaxing him off his lap. Jude got to his feet and offered a hand to the older man, tugging him off the ground with only mild difficulty. Standing before the other, Alvin snorted, bringing a hand up over Jude's head. "Looks like you got taller…"

The younger man pouted, barely concealing a blush. He'd have to get used to Alvin's teasing again. "Two inches. It kind of snuck up on me."

"You make a proper armrest now." To accentuate this, Alvin draped his arm around Jude's shoulder, just as he had all those times before. "Ah, so much better on my back!"

"C-cut it out!" Jude playfully swatted at Alvin's chest, smiling wider than he had in years. Oh, how he missed this.

"Nope, I have two years of heckling you to make up for." As if to throw him off guard, Alvin leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to Jude's cheek, chuckling as the younger man's face bloomed in a brilliant red. "I think I can get used to that shade on you…"

"Alvin!" Jude's face only grew redder with each touch. He'd have to get used to that, too. "Save it for when we get home."

Alvin quirked a brow, his smirk widening. "Oh? You got something planned for me when we get home?"

Jude sighed in exasperation and ducked out from under Alvin's arm. But instead of pulling away entirely, he reached for Alvin's hand. "You can find out when we get there." He offered with a smile, cheeks still burning from his previous attentions. But Jude was quickly finding that he didn't mind, because it was Alvin that was giving such loving gestures to him. It was Alvin's whose hand he held so gently, whose lips he kissed with joy that threatened to bubble over with each touch. It was Alvin, and Alvin was home, Alvin was his.

"Let's go home."

Alvin smiled back at him, twining his fingers with Jude's.

"You've changed, kid." He commented, allowing Jude to lead him down the steadily clearing streets. Jude glanced perplexedly up at him and Alvin chuckled. "You seem more sure of yourself now, like you found your purpose."

Jude's confusion faded to a contented smile, eyes falling to the brick-covered street. "I guess I have a bit. I don't feel so lost anymore, like I was before."

Alvin smiled wistfully, chuckling to himself. "I envy that. Once I decided to leave the mercenary life… I haven't really known what to do with myself."

"Lost?" Such a strange thing to hear from someone that always exuded confidence. Then again, the way Alvin was acting, how he was carrying himself… It was as if he was still wandering, lost without Gilland and Exodus to dictate his life. All the talk about wanting out, leaving his old life of lies and betrayal; was he still looking for a way out? Or was his next move still lost on him? "So you're still trying to find the person you want to be…"

Alvin stared at him, surprised at his perception. It quickly dissolved into a short laugh. "You kids these days… You're wiser than us adults, aren't you?" He sighed, turning his head up to the steadily darkening sky. "But… You're right. I still haven't quite gotten over my bad habits, or even my inability to keep people close… Maybe that's why it's taken me so long to work up the courage to see you."

"Are you planning to leave again?" Once again the questions Jude posed seem to throw him off. But this one was laced with deeper meaning, words that Jude was still too fearful to express. _Are you planning on leaving me?_

Alvin shook his head, giving Jude's hand a reassuring squeeze. "No, I think… I feel like having you at my back will help. It's because of you I saw how messed up things were, how messed up I _still_ am."

"I won't be at your back, Alvin." Jude corrected him, his eyes filled with what could only be love. "And I don't want you at mine, either. Whatever it is we have to face, we're going to face it side by side. Even if things get rough, I won't run, and I don't want you to either."

"Jude…"

Jude stepped closer, holding onto Alvin's hand firmly as he gazed up at him, the setting sun haloing his hair. "So let's keep going, Alvin. Together."

Alvin smiled, clutching Jude's hand tightly, as if he too feared the boy would disappear if he let go. And Jude clutched just as tightly, leaning up on his toes to capture those smiling lips in his own, a touch that was eagerly returned.

Most people take a sabbatical after being involved in a terrorist attack, or getting wrapped up in a madman's scheme, or being forced to flee the country to escape harm. It had been offered, of course, but Jude steadfastly refused the time off. Jude claimed it was his commitment to the project, his determination driving him to keep going. But in truth it was his way of coping with the supposed death of the man he came to love in spite of all the hardships they had faced.

And now that man had returned to him, a little broken, a little lost. But together they could continue down the path of recovery, pursue the answers that they needed to finally find peace in themselves.

The road would be long, and they were sure to stumble, but Jude never felt more excited to start a journey as he did that day with Alvin at his side.

* * *

For side-stories and drabbles for this fic,visit my tumblr found in my profile. Thank you for reading!


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